She shouldn’t. It broke her heart to be suffering under such a nagging sensation at all.
“You can tell me what you’re thinking. Please, Adara,” Chris said after the silence had stretched on for too long.
“I can’t tell you, because I don’t understand it. I just know that I’m in a country I’ve never visited before, and I’m with a man I definitely have feelings for but don’t understand why, and I have a whole life that’s a blank to me. When I’m with you, I’m contented. And yet something inside me tells me that I’m missing the bigger picture.”
“I understand that you’re frightened, my love — I can’t imagine that loss of memory is easy. But I’ll do everything in my power to make you a very happy woman.”
“Why do we need to rush all of this, though? Why can’t we take our time?”
“In my country, princes must be wed by their thirtieth birthday. I didn’t give a . . . whatever . . . for the longest time. I was willing to throw away my title instead of following the rules of a place I was unsure that I even cared about anymore . . .”
Now she was really worried. “Is that why you want to marry me?” The question hurt as she asked it.
“No. I assure you of that. I didn’t plan to marry . . . until I found you. I knew then that I didn’t want to live without you. And my sentiments for you made me understand that I did love my country. You opened my heart. And when I finally saw that I could have the best of both worlds, it calmed me. It saved me. I care about you, Adara — I can’t tell you how much — and I know that you feel the same for me. Though we might seem to be rushing this, love doesn’t work according to any set calendar.” Sheesh. Now he was parroting Xander’s words.
“I’m truly sorry I don’t have the words that you want to hear,” she said, sadness overtaking her.
“You can take your time, Adara. None of this has been easy on you.”
“I need to . . . powder my nose,” Adara told him. She needed a few minutes alone needed them desperately.
He released her hand and she stood up on shaky legs. And she nearly dissolved in tears when he stood at the same time. She loved the custom, loved how attentive a true gentleman he could be. But she just didn’t love not having the answers she needed.
Standing in front of the mirror, Adara pulled out her lipstick and refreshed her makeup. She was trying so hard to remember who she was and what she believed in.
Nothing was coming back to her, nothing at all, even as she pondered her reflection.
“Are you enjoying yourself with Prince Christopher?”
Adara’s eyes met a dark-haired woman’s gaze in the mirror. The woman certainly wasn’t smiling — hell, a deep rage seemed to be burning in this new stranger’s eyes. She was extremely beautiful, with her luxurious hair piled up artfully on her head, and her almost golden eyes highlighted by an expert stylist.
Adara turned to face the woman. “Do I know you?” she asked.
“No, but you should,” the woman said, her voice not rising, but scorn dripping from it.
“I’m so sorry, but I’m having a difficult time remembering anyone,” Adara said. “It’s a long story. What is your name?”
“My name is of no concern to you. All you need to know is that I don’t appreciate whatever spell you have put on my Christopher. He and I were quite happy together before you seduced him. An American, of all things. So tacky — I think that’s a word you know. And now I see you’re wearing my ring.”
“I . . . I don’t understand.” Adara took an instinctive step back. Just her luck to be in the very quiet bathroom alone with such a woman. A woman who spoke in what appeared like a stream of strange italics.
“Christopher and I have known each other since we were young. Our parents knew we would one day be joined together in matrimony. They planned it. And our romance lasted for years. Then he left for America, hiding away like a coward from his country and his responsibilities. When he returned, he had you in tow,” she said, and she took a step closer to Adara.
“He never mentioned that he’d been dating anyone else — not that I know of, at least,” Adara said.
“One expects princes to sow their wild oats. It’s a part of their genes, and one learns to turn a blind eye to these . . . derelictions of duty. Or indiscretions, if you will. But this is outside of enough. He’s placed a ring on the finger of one of his whores. That is unacceptable.”
Adara couldn’t help but blink, though she tried to keep her thoughts to herself. She didn’t owe this woman any explanations at all, but even if she’d wanted to give her any, she wouldn’t have been able to. And all she really wanted at this moment was to get far, far away.
“I see you’re afraid of me. That’s excellent. I can be a great friend, but I’m a nightmare as an enemy. And to make myself clear, if I haven’t already, you are most certainly my enemy.” The woman moved even closer, and her breath fanned Adara’s face.
“I’m sorry. I truly am. If Christopher is indeed in love with you, though, I can’t imagine he would . . . be with me. He’s an honorable man,” Adara said, finding strength as she said the words. She wasn’t about to cower anymore, dammit.
“Hah! Honorable. You don’t know your ‘Prince Charming’ at all. None of them know the least thing about honor. They do what they need to do to live in the manner to which they’re born.”
“If you really feel that way, why in the world would you want to marry this man?” Adara asked her.
“We are perfectly suited in every way. My noble lineage goes back many more centuries than you, as an American, could possibly comprehend. He and I would produce splendid offspring.”
“That’s not a reason to marry,” Adara told her. “Love should enter into the equation.”
“You Americans and your silly notions. What’s love got to do with it? It’s about responsibility and traditions. And it’s about genetics.”
Adara blinked. “I feel sorry for you,” she said. “You’re obviously a very unhappy woman.” She was done with this conversation.
She scooted around this insane person and was reaching for the door when the woman grabbed her.
“Don’t you dare feel sorry for me, you little bitch. You’re the one who will be sorry.” And then she let go and was suddenly gone.
Adara took a moment to compose herself before returning to the table where Chris was sitting. He looked up with his usual welcoming smile, but that smile quickly turned to concern.
“Has something upset you?” he asked as he rose, rushed toward her, and took her hands. “What is wrong?”
“It’s nothing. I just think the food didn’t agree with me.”
She wasn’t pleased with herself for deceiving him in that way, but she was reluctant to tell him about her visitor. Not yet, anyway. She had a lot to think about.
“I am sorry, Adara. Let me get you back to the palace.”
He pulled her into his arms and held her on the way back, and that helped — it helped more than she wanted it to. Being with him made her so happy. Or it did most of the time. Maybe she should just deep-six her feelings of unease, forget about the strange woman in the restaurant restroom, and just enjoy this moment, enjoy her time with Prince Christopher of Rubare Collina.
Yes, maybe that was exactly what she’d do.
Chapter Twelve
As Adara walked along the paths in the large gardens behind the palace, she came to a decision. Would she ever regain her memory? Who really knew? And she couldn’t just wait with that sort of uncertainty, wait indefinitely to live her life. Yes, all she had to go by at this point was the way she felt when she was with Chris now. Prince Chris. Prince Christopher. His Royal Highness.
Yes, that was a lot to deal with. But she felt wonderful.
So, even though she was still assailed by feelings of doubt, she knew she was going to marry this man. How could it be wrong? After all, it was already a decision she’d made, wasn’t it?
“Are you enjoying the weather?”
Adara turned and smiled up at Chris’s brother Bryan. “Yes, very much. What are you doing out here, away from palace business?”
“I’ve been working with Xander and Christopher on commercial business for our company, Dyholm, and I decided I needed a walk. It appears that you and I both had the same idea,” he said, easily falling into step with her.
“Yes. I was trying to clear my head. Or what I have left of it.”
“Anything to do with my brother?”
“Maybe,” she said, but she was hardly about to elaborate on that.
“You know, I’m sure that all three of us — my father’s sons, I mean — haven’t had an easy life in many respects, though that statement might seem surprising to many people. But if I may speak for myself and Xander . . . we’ve never been happier since we each found the woman we were meant to find all along.”
“Yes, I can see how much both of you adore your respective wives. It’s touching. And inspiring. And Chris is very kind to me.”
“And why do you think that is?” he said before answering his own question. “It’s because he feels the same way about you as Xander and I feel about the women we chose to marry.”
“Thank you,” she told him. She felt awkward about discussing her feelings for Chris, especially to one of his brothers.
“Adara, I’m not normally a man to talk about emotions, but finding my wife and the child I didn’t know I had changed me in many ways. Fighting against the Arcano has also changed me. Give our brother a chance and he’ll prove to you how loyal he is.”
Adara stopped, and Bryan was now a few steps ahead of her before he realized what had happened. He turned and waited.
“What is the Arcano?” she asked grimly. “Or who? And why do you have to fight against them?”
His face instantly became a blank mask, and it surprised her. “I’m sorry,” he said. “I thought that Christopher had spoken to you already about that secret society.”
