Page 33 of The Design of Goodbye
“Liam’s going to find out I told you.” I shifted nervously. “As soon as Tanner says something to him, he’ll know it was me.”
She shrugged. “Roo will probably think I was at the library and saw him.”
“Liam’s not going to believe that.”
I saw Liam across the lunchroom. As always, he was alone. Sadness filled me at the rumors that were probably circulating through the school—all because of me.
“I don’t get what the big deal is.” She huffed and glanced back to our table where Claire was beckoning her over. “It’s not like he’s your friend. Stop caring about him so much.”
No matter how much I wished I could strip myself of emotions and not care about Liam, it was impossible. Emotions weren’t a switch I could turn on and off. They justwere.
“You weren’t there,” I said. “You didn’t see him. You’d understand if you had.”
“What Iunderstandis I’m your best friend, and you helped me get Tanner back. Think about what you did forme.” She turned to walk away but then added, “But, seriously, Madison, you need to get your priorities straight. You’ve been acting weird the past few weeks. I don’t like it.”
She walked away, leaving me trembling with anger. To calm myself down, I bought a water, even though I wasn’t thirsty. Back at the table, Alex and Tanner were shooting grapes into each other’s mouths. Claire wouldn’t look at me, and Jules seemed far too happy. I didn’t have to wonder why for long.
The lunch bell rang, and Tanner grinned mischievously. “It’s time.”
“Time for what?” I asked him.
He pointed behind me. “Just watch.”
Liam was walking in the direction of our table. My stomach clenched with fearful anticipation.
Right as Liam walked by us, Tanner threw something at him and yelled, “Boo!”
A book hit Liam on his shoulder. Liam stopped.
“Wait, Roo,” said Tanner when Liam picked up the book. “Help me out because I’m confused. It’s not books you’re afraid of...it’s the library?”
Everyone laughed. I froze. Liam’s face was emotionless as he threw the book directly at Tanner. His aim was perfect, but Tanner fumbled the book; it fell out of his arms and under the table.
“For a wide receiver, that was a pretty embarrassing catch,” said Liam. “You might want to fit in extra practice before your next game.”
Liam walked away.
I felt sick.
“I’m done,” I said, surprising myself. “This isn’t funny. You’re bullying him because of some petty bullshit that happened during gym classlast year.”
Tanner turned red. As he struggled to form a good response, I stood and said to Jules, “I don’t want to be part of this anymore. The deal’s over.”
Claire gasped.
“You sure about that?” asked Jules.
“Post the pictures. I don’t care.”
Of course I cared. But, apparently, I cared more about protecting Liam’s feelings than my own.
* * *
After school, I showed up at Invisible Thread to find Taylor and her mom, Bev, arguing. Again. It was a weekly occurrence. They argued overeverything—if it was going to snow, if they should have fish or tacos for dinner, if they should repaint the lobby area blue or yellow. I never knew how to handle it. Their arguing confused and kind of terrified me. I’dneverargued with my mom, so witnessing Taylor stand her ground in front of hers kept me hovering silently in the doorway until they either saw me or came to an agreement.
Today, their argument was about how best to fix the long sleeves of a floor-length chiffon dress. Through their fighting, I’d figured out our frequent client, Charlotte, hated the long sleeves and wanted them designed into something different. Charlotte was incredibly indecisive and had left Bev and Taylor to decide on exactly what that something different would be. Bev suggested tank sleeves, while Taylor wanted flutter sleeves.
“Madison’s here,” said Taylor, throwing her arms up in defeat. “Let’s ask her.”
