Page 64 of The Design of Goodbye
“I miss you.”
A shiver shot down my spine at Jules’s voice. I stared into my locker and willed her to leave. This was not how I wanted to end my school day.
She didn’t leave.
“You’ve been ignoring my texts and me,” she whined.
I pressed my lips into a thin line.
“Please, Madison, I’m over the whole Roo thing. I need my best friend back.”
I whipped around to face her. Ignoring her texts over the past few days proved to be much easier than ignoring her standing inches away from me and saying things likethat.
“You’reoverit? Do you have any idea what you put me through?”
“I’m sorry.” My resolve faded at those words. “I feel really bad about everything. Ineedyou.”
“Do you?”
It was an honest question. She’d been surrounded by friends the past week. She hadn’t needed me then. And she hadn’t missed me; I knew what missing someone looked like.
“I mean, think about it,” she continued. “We’ve been best friends for so long—you can’t ruin that. You, like...have to forgive me.”
My stomach rolled, and I suddenly felt nauseous. Not because of her terrible acting but because Iknew.
I was going to forgive her.
I desperately wanted to stand up for myself. I hadn’t deserved what she’d done to me, but the last few days without her had been lonely. Being alone was far worse than being friends with her.
But what about Liam?Isn’t he your—maybe—friend? You aren’t completely alone.I quickly pushed those thoughts away. If only I was strong enough to sit with him at lunch, choose his friendship instead.
And then I thought of my mom. She would be so disappointed with me if I didn’t forgive Jules. What if she came back and discovered Jules and I weren’t friends anymore? Would she turn around and leave again?
“Did you take the pictures down?” I asked.
Surprise didn’t cross her features. In our almost eight years of friendship, arguments between us weren’t uncommon. And in the end, I always forgave her, no matter what she’d done to hurt me.
“I will right now!”
She stood so close to me our shoulders touched. Her lavender perfume was overwhelming. I took in small breaths, trying not to breathe in. She pulled up Whirl on her phone and deleted the pictures. Deleting them didn’t really matter. Someone had probably saved them or kept one of the pictures she’d scattered around the senior hallway. They’d never really disappear.
“Don’t do it again.”
She flung her arms around me. “Promise.”
My arms stayed limp at my sides. I couldn’t get myself to hug her back. I was still so angry at her.
And at myself.
She pulled away, and I stepped back, my hip digging painfully into my open locker door. Taylor was standing a few lockers away, watching me. I looked away.
“Buzz?” suggested Jules.
“It’s Wednesday,” I said. “I have to work.”
Jules frowned. “Tomorrow? We could get Buzz and then watch movies, like old times.”
“Yeah, sure.”
