Page 37 of Home to Me (The Andrades 2)
“I didn’t know what to think of Nick when I first met him. He has quite a reputation, you know? But underneath all that, he’s a good guy. Don’t give up on him too easily.” Janet ended her pep talk with a wink.
Rena spun around and walked into the doorjamb. She stumbled back and made a hasty second retreat. Once around the corner she leaned against the wall and caught her breath.
The idea that Janet was cheering them on from the sidelines shook Rena. Janet thought their relationship was real. Which made her face the ugly realization that Nick might have thought the same thing.
Rena couldn’t breathe each time she entertained the possibility that Nick might have feelings for her. Nor could she breathe when she asked herself how she felt about him.
Love and suffocation—who knew they could feel so similar?
Rena covered her face and repeated the scary realization to herself. I love Nick. I should have told him that when he came to me, upset and confused. I know his family well enough to know how bad that day was for him. But I was so afraid of admitting how I felt—even to myself—that I wasn’t there for him when he most needed me.
What kind of love is that?
Pushing off the wall, Rena headed back toward her office. If she truly had ruined her chance of being with Nick, her time at Cogent was over. Every window reminded her of a time they’d stopped beside it to tell each other about their days. She couldn’t look at the elevator outside her office without thinking about the first time Nick had kissed her.
Rena sat at her desk and stared at her computer monitor without turning it on. She refused to start crying again. She thought back to how concerned her mother had looked when she’d rushed into her house on Saturday. Rena had cried and cried in her mother’s arms until she had no tears left to shed.
She’d tried to explain, both to Kane and her mother, that she wasn’t upset with Nick; she was disappointed in herself. She’d always blamed others for holding her back from doing what she really wanted to do. She’d had this fantasy version of herself she’d clung to for years, telling herself if she had a chance she would be bolder, braver.
In the end, she hadn’t even been a good friend to Nick, and that was what she regretted the most. She’d told his brothers to have faith in him, but she hadn’t. She would never forget the look in Nick’s eyes when he’d walked away from her. Once again he’d been made to feel he wasn’t good enough, and this time it was her fault.
Kane had been furious with Nick at first but then, surprisingly, he’d promised to remain neutral. Rena guessed it was because he feared if he didn’t say so Rena was going to start crying all over him.
“Rena.”
She looked up quickly at Gio’s face, then cursed when she realized her cheeks were wet with tears. Angrily, she wiped them away. “Sorry,” Rena said as she fumbled to find a tissue in her desk drawer. “Allergies.”
“Come into my office.”
“Sure,” Rena said and followed him. She took a seat in one of the chairs before his desk, expecting him to sit behind it as he normally did. Instead, he paced back and forth beside it. Rena braced herself in anticipation of another lecture on why she and Nick didn’t belong together. Gio continued not to say anything until Rena couldn’t hold back her thoughts anymore. She burst out, “Gio, I know what you’re going to say. You’re angry because you found out Nick and I have been seeing each other and lying about it. You’re probably going to tell me you don’t think I should work here anymore, but before you do that, there is something I need to say.” Tears misted up in her eyes, but she blinked them back. “Nick is an amazing man. He’s honest. He’s funny. He never did a single thing wrong with me. In fact, he was better to me than I was to him. So if you’re going to be angry with anyone for this, I want to make sure you’re upset with the right person. Me. Nick wanted to tell you about us, but I convinced him to keep it a secret. He didn’t let you down, I did. You have your brother in your life again. Don’t let something I did take that away from either of you.”
Gio’s face tightened. “Is the Lyndon report complete? I gave it to you on Thursday.”
“Oh,” Rena said and choked in surprise at his question. “Almost. I was adding your final notes from Friday.”
“I need it finished by noon.”
Rena stood. “I’ll get right on it.”
“Your personal life doesn’t belong at work, Rena.”
Well, that’s a slap in the face if I ever felt one. “I understand, Gio.”
Gio walked around his desk and sat down. He sorted through the mail on his desk while he spoke. “Now, if you want to have dinner with Julia and me on Thursday night, we could make sure Nick joins us.”
Rena swayed where she stood. “Did you just say what I think you said?”
Gio looked up from the mail. “My brother would be one lucky son of a bitch if he ended up with you, and our family needs all the sanity we can marry into. I was wrong to tell either of you who you could be with. Let’s leave it at that.”
Rena rushed around Gio’s desk, threw her arms around him, and burst into happy tears. “Thank you. Nick and I need to figure this out on our own, though. I don’t think surprising him at dinner would help.”
He awkwardly gave her a pat on the back and said, “You know what would help, Rena? Work. I need that report.”
Rena stepped back and laughed, drying her eyes on her sleeve. “Yes, sir.”
“And, Rena, it’ll go a lot faster if you turn your computer on.”
***
Nick sat on the stone railing of his uncle’s patio and looked out over acres of manicured lawn. He’d traveled halfway around the world to attend an Andrade wedding, but this was Nick’s first time at the Andrade family home in New York. He marveled at the blend of old-world wealth and modern-day tricycles. The area closet to the enormous home was dotted with gym sets and sandboxes.
Alessandro stood a few feet away, gazing out over his land along with Nick. “It’s beautiful, isn’t it? Elise and I wanted our piece of the American dream, and this is where we found it. You came on a quiet day. Every Sunday that lawn is full of generations of Andrades. Maddy’s husband is a world-renowned French chef, but on
Sundays he cooks Italian for us. Do you remember all those cousins you met on Isola Santos? Half of them live around here. You should come by and get to know them.”
“I may take you up on that offer.”
“You’re always welcome here, Nick. You always were.”
Nick met his uncle’s eyes and saw only sincerity there. “Do you know my father’s second family in Venice?”
A sadness entered Alessandro’s eyes. “I know of them.”
“I knew about them long before I had proof. Even when my father was with us, part of him was somewhere else. That’s why I was the daredevil I was. He said he worried for me. I suppose I thought if I gave him enough to worry about he wouldn’t forget me when he went away.”
Shaking his head sadly, Alessandro said, “Your father loved you.”
“My father didn’t know what love was. He said he loved my mother, but you tell me what kind of love allows a man to lie to his family as much as he lied to ours?”
Alessandro walked over and laid a hand on Nick’s shoulder. “Love is a funny thing. It can bring out the best and the worst in people. I don’t agree with what your father did, but that doesn’t change how much I miss him. It’s okay to be angry with him, but it’s not okay to use him as an excuse to be less than the man you should be.”
Nick whipped his shoulder away from Alessandro’s hand. “What do you mean, less than I should be?”
In an authoritative tone, Alessandro said, “I don’t agree with how you’re treating little Rena. I met her. You should give her more respect and not hide what you’re doing. She deserves more than what you’re giving her.”
Nick folded his arms across his chest. “I’m not giving her anything anymore. We’re not together.”
