Page 19 of Last Letters to Ara
Fine. Theo wants to run before we walk? Let’s take that new leaf and fucking shred it, rather than gently turning it over.
“The only friend I’ve ever had ended up sleeping with my boyfriend behind my back for God only knows how long. Ergo, the destruction of all desire of mine to have close, trusting relationships again.”
Theo blows out a breath. “Thatisrough. But I’ll raise you from one ‘cheating ex with best friend’ to ‘cheating ex with my own father.”
“NO!”
“I wish I could cut out the section of my brain which stores that haunting memory.”
“You SAW it!?”
“Unfortunately.”
“How does that even happen!?”
“Well, when two people love each other very much...”
“Theo! I know how sex works. I want to know how your father had enough game to swoop in and steal your girl?”
“Is that a roundabout way of saying that you think I’m a catch?” he says with a little smirk.
A sound of frustration. “That’s not what I was saying!”
He smiles anyway. “I think it was less about his game, and more about his money, something I don’t go waving around.”
“How could someone do that to you?” It makes me genuinely nauseous thinking about what Theo must have gone through.
“I used to ask myself the same thing every day, until I realized that she did me a favor. Imagine if I had ended up spending the rest of my life with someone like that.”
I’ve never thought about it like that. It’s so...healthy. Why bother missing someone who doesn’t recognize your worth? “My sob story seems significantly less sob-worthy now.”
“I’m glad my life has made yours seem a tad less tragic, but no need to pity me. Real-life trauma is great inspiration for fiction.”
I could sit here and talk to Theo until sunrise. Maybe even longer. I want to ask him about his father, so I can learn about what kind of man could do that to their son, and thisawfulex-girlfriend. I would also ask him about the fiction he writes and how he can imagine such things.
I find myself wanting to knoweverything. It’s terrifying.
“On that cheery note, I should probably get back home and get some sleep. Turns out, I still have work tomorrow.” I joke.I JOKE.
He nods. “I’ll walk you to your car.”
I should say no.
But I don’t.
We make our way to the staff parking in comfortable silence, both of us processing how we ended up here tonight. My lime-green Volkswagen beetle comes into view when Theo finally speaks. “My phone died, and I should let my roommate know that I’ll be home soon. I’m not usually out this late and he might be worried. Mind if I borrow yours?”
“Yeah, of course.” I pull out my ancient iPhone and hand it over. I’ve never bothered with passcodes. Partly because I don’t have anything to snoop for, but also because even thieves have higher standards. I watch him type in a number, but instead of making a call, he hands it back to me.
Confused, I look down and see a new contact under “Theo” with the two dancing girls emoji. I can’t help my surprised giggle.
“That’s us, because we are already on our way to being BFFs.”
This weird feeling takes flight in my gut, as if I’m on a roller coaster looking over the edge of the next drop, full of anticipation.
“Sorry, but I don’t know if you could work that leotard.” I tell him with a little smile.
“That’s number five.”
