And here it comes—the booty call request. She remained silent and waited for it. Hearing it would come as a relief in some ways.
“I meant what I said about wanting to brainstorm with you on ways I could support Sophie’s charity event. You know her better than I do, and I value your opinion. I realize we’ll see each other at breakfast, but what are you doing after that? Spend the day with me.”
Lexi chewed her bottom lip. “Tomorrow?”
“Of course tomorrow. Or, considering the hour, today to be more precise. How brave are you feeling?”
Excitement and disappointment filled her. She wouldn’t say yes to him, but she wasn’t ready to say no to him either. “Brave? I don’t think we should—”
“Sorry, forget it. It was a ridiculous idea. Blame the time of night.”
Even though Clay was proving to be just like every other man she’d known, it didn’t make him a bad person. It simply meant he wasn’t any more special than they’d been. “It’s my fault. I shouldn’t have called.” Her voice was thick with emotion.
“It’s just that she asks me to visit every year, and I’ve always found a reason not to. I thought that since she’s only a few hours away this might be the year I drop in.”
Lexi sat up in her bed. “Drop in where? Who are you talking about?”
“My cousin Jacqueline. She grew up here in the United States and reconnecting with her has been on my to-do list.”
There was something in his voice that lent this topic importance. “But you haven’t.”
“No. She can be—intense.”
“So you don’t like her.”
“I didn’t say that. It’s a long boring story.”
“I wasn’t sleeping anyway,” Lexi said gently.
With that, Clay began a story of a boy raised by grandparents who gave him everything and demanded nothing except he keep a low profile in their lives. If he didn’t ask questions, didn’t cause trouble, everything and anything he wanted was at his disposal. He described his childhood as a happy one except for the times when Aunt Gina visited with her daughter. Although Clay and Jacqueline had been similar in age, Jacqueline had always been the top of her class. She had an opinion about almost every topic imaginable and the business savviness to achieve the goals she set for herself. Her fortune had risen, dipped, then risen again, and each time she came back stronger. “I know exactly how she’ll set me up,” Clay said. “She’ll list the companies she is now president or chief executive officer of now, then she’ll give me this tight little smile and ask ‘And what have you been doing?’”
“I hate that question. You might as well ask someone how much they weigh.”
“Exactly.”
“I can understand why you haven’t gone to see her.”
“She can be a real pill, but . . . she’s my only living relative. Look at the Barringtons, they have their issues, but they work it out. I feel like I should at least try.”
Lexi dug out the flash drive and hugged it to her chest. “And you wanted me to go with you?”
Clay cleared his throat. “Ridiculous, right?”
No, beautiful—the most beautiful Christmas present she’d ever received. “Let’s do it. Let’s go see that cousin of yours.”
“If it’s awful, I’ll make it up to you.”
“It won’t be,” she promised, although she had no way of knowing if it would be or not.
“What about your family, Lexi? You never talk about them. Where do they live?”
She told Clay about how she’d lost her parents early in life. Despite how different her childhood had been from Clay’s, in the ways that mattered, they’d been similar. Both were in search of something better. Taking turns, they compared the stupid mistakes they’d made over the years. She’d been rebellious, he’d been self-indulgent. Neither had been happy in their own way. They were both at a place where they were ready for a change, but not sure what that meant.
Most of what Lexi said she would never had shared with anyone because she knew the type of helpful, motivating lecture that would be showered upon her. She didn’t want to completely overhaul who she was, but she did have areas she could work on.
Clay was the same. He was by far not apologizing for the privileged life he lived, but he wanted to be more—for his time on the planet to have mattered. As Lexi listened to him describe his vague, nagging discontent with how he was living his life, she had to stop herself from saying, “I know exactly how that feels,” over and over again.
The sun came up and filled the room with light. Lexi looked at the clock beside her bed. “Oh, my God, it’s morning. We’ve been talking for hours.”
“So we have. What time do you want me to pick you up?”
A mild panic spread through Lexi. The last few hours had been good, so good, that she felt unexpectedly vulnerable. She wanted to believe.
In him.
In herself.
In possibilities.
Lexi had survived the loss of her parents and everything else life had thrown at her by telling herself she didn’t care. She had consistently chosen the thrill of the new over investing too much of herself in one person or even one career. Other than her sister and her best friend, Kenzi, she’d kept her attachments to a minimum. The less she cared about, the less life could rip away from her. It was a survivor’s philosophy, and she’d felt comfortable with it until recently.
Unlike the men she’d dated in the past, Lexi didn’t feel that Clay wanted to control her, or worse, change her. Her stomach did a nervous flip. Part of her wanted to spend the rest of the morning getting to know him. Part of her wanted to hang up and never speak to him again.
Something told her that if she wasn’t careful, this man could do something no other man had. He could break my heart.
Only if I give him the power to. One good conversation doesn’t need to change anything.
He wants to take me with him to see his family, but that means nothing more than he simply doesn’t want to go alone.
“I’ll meet you there.”
He chuckled. “Afraid if you let me in your door we’ll miss breakfast and spend the day in bed?”
“Yes,” she said honestly. A rush of desire spread through Lexi at the image. With nothing more than his voice, he’d lit a need in her so raw she wanted to suggest he come over right then, but she didn’t.
He groaned. “You’re not making it easy for me to respect your decision.”
“My decision?”
“To wait until New Year’s Eve.”
Oh, yeah. I forgot about that. She’d been testing him, sure he would back off as soon as he realized she wasn’t going to drop into bed with him. She could tell him now that she’d been joking, but it might be better if he thought she’d been serious. “It wasn’t meant as a countdown.”
“So you’re reneging on your bet? Even though I won fair and square.”
“I wouldn’t have bet sex.” Shit. I hope I didn’t bet sex.
He made a deep sound in his thr
oat. “Don’t tell me you can’t remember what you promised if you lost.”
“We were both drunk.”
“I remember every moment of that night.”
“Good for you. A gentleman would realize that whole conversation was a joke, and he’d drop it.”
His laugh was sexy and tempting. “I have been accused of being many things, but being a gentleman was never one of them. And you can claim to want one, but we both know I’m more your taste.”
“Keep telling yourself that,” she answered lightly. The way he said taste had her licking her lip as she remembered the heavenly feel of his mouth on hers. Even as she told herself the wisest course of action was to keep things casual, she couldn’t help but smile.
“That’s it, I’m definitely collecting on the bet.”
“Thankfully, I know when you’re not serious.” Lexi’s breathing came quicker. This was the other side of what they had—the sizzle.
“Do you? I’m going to enjoy testing that confidence of yours.”
No, don’t. It’s already unsteady. “I’ll see you at breakfast, Clay.”
“Say my name again.”
“Clay,” she said with a light laugh.
“Not like that. Softer, huskier, like it turns you on when you say it.”
“Clay,” she whispered in her best bedroom voice. Giving him what he wanted was its own pleasure. Not wanting him to see that she was equally affected she added, “Yes. Yes. Oh, yes, Clay.”
He made a pleased sound. “I’ll take that for now, although that last part will sound even better when I’m sinking into you again and again. On New Year’s Eve. Just like you promised.”
Lexi closed her eyes as a wave of hunger for him rocked through her. New Year’s Eve was a week away. Would they even be talking by then? If so, wouldn’t sleeping with him be a mistake? He wasn’t some guy who would fade out of her life afterward. As Dax’s best friend he would always be there, a potential long-term reminder of how she still wasn’t strong enough to make better choices.
But, oh, what a good bad choice he’d be. “Bye, Clay.” This time her voice was richer, full of the need he’d lit in her.
“Better. For now. See you at breakfast.”
