Page 55 of I Kissed Shara Wheeler
“Well,” Rory says, “I remember it different.”
“Okay, well.” Smith shrugs. “Whatever.”
“Whatever.”
“Are we good?” Chloe asks.
“We’re good,” Smith says.
Rory looks at Smith for a long moment, then crams his hands into his pockets.
“Whatever.”
Later, she spends the remainder of seventh hour rewriting lines of Shara’s last note from memory in the margins of her AP Calc notebook and wondering why exactly this doesn’t feel the way she thought it would.
Somewhere, in a different classroom, Smith is confronting the fact that this girl he’s spent two years projecting a high school sweetheart onto is distant, not because she’s too complex, but because she didn’t want him to see who she really was. Rory’s probably already slouched in the driver’s seat of his car, wondering if the girl next door ever existed at all.
Chloe already knew these things. But of all the possibilities she considered for the real Shara, she never seriously thought “evil genius” would be the one that fit.
Shara wrote in Smith’s note that she wanted to show him the truth, and that’s exactly what she’s doing. She’s not an angel. She’s the type of girl who hurts her friends on purpose and breaks her promises and leaves the people who care about her the most without even saying goodbye.
She gets why Shara would want Smith and Rory to know—what’s the point of wanting and being wanted in return if the person they want isn’t truly you? She still doesn’t get why Shara decided to tell her though.
But now that she knows… well, she hates to admit it. She really does. But this Shara, the one spelled out on pink stationery, is a million times more interesting than the fake one. Like, no contest.
It’s kind of a bummer she’s the only one who sees it that way.
FROM THE BURN PILE
Passed notes between Ace Torres and Shara Wheeler
Scribbled on the back of Bible worksheet titled “Armoring Yourself with the Lord”
Hey Shara!
I’m trying to study, Ace.
Cool, I was just wondering if you were free this afternoon for practice
We’ve practiced twice already this week.
I know, but I’m still not sure I have that last note down
You do. You sound good. Also, I have an essay due tomorrow.
Really?? You think so??? I mean, I guess if you think I’m ready, it’s just that tryouts are next week and every time I think about it I feel like I’m gonna blow chunks
Please never, ever use that expression again.
Sorry!!!! I’m just really nervous!!!
I’ll be over at 4.
12
DAYS WITHOUT SHARA: 17
DAYS UNTIL GRADUATION: 26
