Page 114 of Sit, Stay, Love
He shook his head and ran the backs of his fingers softly across her cheek. ‘I’m sure I’ve started it every single time. You need to make your decision about LA for you. Because it’s what you want. This,’ his finger waved between them, ‘shouldn’t be part of the equation.’ He rested his forehead on hers. ‘Though if you wanted to come for me too, I’d be stoked.’
She laughed and lightly kissed him. ‘Thank you. It’s a big decision, and having you on my side is pretty great.’
‘I’m a pretty great guy.’ He flashed her a grin, then lifted the pillow on his lap and peeked beneath it. ‘I don’t think this is going anywhere soon. I guess it’s dark out. Though I’ll take the long way home.’ He smirked. ‘I don’t want to impress my neighbours.’
She sat on the couch, her hair wet from the shower and her favourite pyjamas soft and comforting against her still-tingling skin. Buffy was tucked under her arm, demanding attention for being so unceremoniously tossed out of her bedroom.
She held Buffy’s face and looked into her soft, brown eyes. ‘Sorry about that.’ The dog slurped her nose. ‘Ew.’ She laughed. ‘How can I leave behind your bad breath kisses? Shall we go check on everyone?’
She grabbed a torch from beside the front door, shook out her gumboots – making sure no spiders had made their home in them – slid them on and went to check the kennels. The rain had finally stopped, but the ground squelched noisily below her feet, and Oxford Falls roared in the distance.
The dogs winced and blinked when she turned on the lights, stretched and wagged their tails, their noses poking through the gaps in their enclosure. Sera gave each one a treat and a pat and made her way through to the cattery. Two of the kittens she’d found under the house had already been homed, and the remaining siblings were curled into a basket together and squinted as they looked at her. The fat tabby the police had brought in had someone picking it up on Saturday, and Cookie and Monster sat on their cat tree, viewing her with utter disdain. As usual. Carol had taken a surrendered Oriental home to foster, but Sera was fairly certain she’d fail and the cat would soon be a permanent part of Carol’s family.
She looked up and down the row of animals, all of them eyeing her expectantly. ‘I love you guys,’ she said as she flicked off the lights. ‘Sweet dreams, babies.’
She sloshed her way down the paddock and towards the barn, the beam from her torch bouncing in front of her and Buffy’s chunky backside lit by the sliver of moonlight peeking through the clouds.
The horse and the sheep were tucked into their stall, content and warm. They’d become friends, and though they originally had separate living areas, they’d chosen to live together. She smiled as she looked at them, lying on the hay with their backs touching.
She reached down and patted Buffy’s head. ‘Maybe I’ll keep these guys. I’ll ask Herriot what he thinks.’ She looked towards her grandparents’ house glowing warmly at the top of the rise. ‘Can I really leave this behind, Buff? Even if only for a few months?’
And what if it was longer than a few months? What if her relationship with Ethan took off and they fell in love, and he got another job and she wanted to stay in America with him? What would happen to the rescue? What would happen to the animals? What would happen to her and Toby?
She turned and trudged back through the wet grass, her shoulders sagging under the weight of a decision she didn’t know how to make.
Chapter Twenty
Pros and Cons
Sera sat at her office desk and chewed at her thumb as she stared at the heading on her computer screen. She’d lain awake half the night, trying to decide what to do, her thoughts getting more and more jumbled and strange, as thoughts tend to do in the darkness, with nothing to draw them in line but a sleep-deprived brain. It seemed they were no clearer in the light of day.
‘Pros,’ she said to herself. Then began typing.
Money.
Money always helps. But if the upcoming fundraiser was a success, that could give the rescue’s finances the boost she needed. She may even get regular contributors other than her dad. So maybe money wasn’t a good enough reason to take the leap. She hit backspace and deleted money.
Experience.
It could be the start of a new career. But is that what she wanted? She sighed. Nope. She didn’t want to become a professional dog handler. She wanted to save dogs and build Rose’s into something special, and she wanted to write, and she was already doing both those things. She hit the backspace button again.
Adventure.
Yes. It would be an adventure and she was definitely up for that.
Ethan.
Ethan.
Ethan.
She groaned and decided to start on the cons list instead. With a deep breath, her fingers hovered over the keyboard.
Toby.
If she was going to add Ethan to the pros list, Toby had to be on the cons. Five or six times. Because out of it all, he was going to be the hardest thing to leave. Everything would change between them. Some days, she thought that was a good thing, but on her bad days, when all she wanted was his calming voice and soothing arms, his warm hugs and a cup of tea on his couch and his soft eyes smiling at her, she just couldn’t see her world without him, not even for a day.
‘Ugh.’ She hit close without saving, deleting the whole list. It’d been a stupid idea anyway. The decision was too big for a dumb list. It was epic; life-changing.
