Page 85 of Smoke Screen
“I’m not kidding,” she said, “I have issues, believe me, I’m aware, but man-oh-man, you take passive aggressive to new heights.”
He spun back, his eyes wider than dinner plates. “Are you nuts?”
Actually, this might be the most sane she’d ever felt. “You should ask yourself that.”
He propped his hands on his hips and craned his head toward her, clearly shocked that Good Girl Maddy actually had a spine.
“What the hell, Maddy?”
She stepped inside, stalking by him and then whirling back, jabbing her fingers into her chest. “Seems to me, of the two of us, I’m the more self-aware. I mean, yes, I’m a pleaser. To a fault. I know that. I’m working on it. Trying not to apologize all the damned time. Trying to make sure people don’t walk all over me because I’m the good one. Good Girl Maddy. That’s me. And, let me tell you, after the last couple of days? I’m about filled.Up. I am fuckingchokingon my need to make people happy. Iknowthat about myself, Phin. Understand it on a visceral level. You? Complete denial.”
His mouth hung open. Total shock.
Good.
“Denial?”he said, his tone harsher than he’d ever used with her.
Good. Whatever this was between them, he needed to know they were equals. Despite his apparent protective instincts, she had a say in her life.
“Yes,” she shot back. “Denial. Whether it’s not living the life you’d expected—you said yourself you feel trapped—or being around people like Senator Blakely who make you feel crummy, you, my friend, are not happy.”
Whoa.She’d just said that. Out loud.Buh-bye, Good Girl Maddy.
Instinct kicking in, she opened her mouth, ready to apologize. To plead her case.
No.
She clamped her lips shut. Wrong? Maybe so, but he’d been rude to her first, which, news flash, wasn’t exactly a mature attitude.
So what? For once, she’d be reckless.
If she’d stepped over a line, so be it. He could tell her to fuck off. Which he probably would, forthwith. Tout de suite.
“Oh, please.” Phin waved her off with both hands. “Happy. I love how people throw that word around like it actually means something. Is anyonehappy? There’s always more to want. Does that make usunhappy or ambitious? Why does wanting more mean I’m unhappy?”
“Wanting more isn’t the problem. Not going after it is. That’s the damned difference. Clearly, you’re mad about something. If whatever happened in the time between us getting back and now isn’t my fault, don’t take it out on me.”
She made a move toward the door, striding past him, head high. Before she got there, his hand clamped on her wrist, halting her.
She peered down at his hand, then slowly drew her gaze up, meeting his eye before she blasted him for putting his hands on her. Immediately, he let go, held his hands up in surrender.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
“For?”
“Grabbing you. Acting like a toddler. All of it.”
She folded her arms across her chest, forcing herself not to be tempted to touch him. “All I wanted was a box of tissues. That’s why I came up here.”
He dropped his chin to his chest, shaking his head. “I’m sorry. You walked into me having a meltdown. No excuse for being nasty to you.”
And, oh, the tips of her fingers itched. She tapped them against her biceps, keeping them busy so she didn’t get the harebrained idea of doing something. Something like touching Phin.Tap-tap. Tap-tap.“What happened?”
He let out a huff that may have been a laugh but didn’t quite make it. “Honestly, I’m not sure. It started out with me being pissed at Ash because he was here this morning and we had that great talk. Then we came back to reporters outside, and he didn’t even give us a warning.”
She uncrossed her arms, holding up her hands. Classic halt signal. “Not to throw your words back at you, but it’s not about you. It’s about me and this crazy situation.”
Fingers on fire, she finally reached for him, loosely clasping his forearms. “I know you don’t want to hear this, but I really should go. Being here is causing y’all way too much trouble. I’m a grown woman and can take care of myself.”
