Page 84 of Scheme
“That’s all it took? A good bollocking? I didn’t realise it was so easy to get the great Kit Iyer to fall in love,” I sniffed, a stray tear escaping. I was trying to joke, to play down the seriousness of the conversation, but Kit wasn’t letting me off the hook so easily.
“Well, no one else has ever managed it,” he said mildly. “In short, if you want to break up with me, it better be because you can’t stand the sight of me, Margot. There’s no self-sacrificing bullshit happening here, okay?”
“I don’t know how this works,” I whispered, wringing my hands together. “Where we go from here, what to do. Kit, I’m terrified.”
“Come here.” He pushed his chair back and I didn’t hesitate to round the table, sitting in his lap and burying my nose at his throat. Kit’s scent was so soothing that my heart rate slowed from a gallop to a trot almost instantly.
I’d always wanted to live in New York. And while I was happy on my own, I’d be willing to take a mate if they were therightmate, and Kit ticked every box I had. And while I was still nervous about my scent influencing him, the job application had calmed my worries somewhat.
So, what was holding me back?
Was it just the idea of change? Or was it something more?
Kit held me tightly, a gentle, rusty purr rumbling up from his chest, lulling me into a peaceful bubble.
I wouldn’t like it all the time,I thought vaguely, but the purr definitely had its moments.
“We’re going to that party,” Kit murmured eventually, giving my thigh a gentle squeeze. “You can tell your family whatever you want about us, about me, but you’re not going alone.”
“I could just not go at all,” I slurred, still a little purr-drunk even though Kit had cut off my supply.
Kit hummed. “I know you’d figure out another way to help Asher if you didn’t go, but you’d still regret it I think.”
“You’re right,” I sighed, my head clearing. “But you and I still need to talk about everything. To figure this all out.”
Kit pressed a kiss to my temple. “We will. But I get the feeling that your head will be clearer after you talk to your family. This event has been weighing on you for weeks.”
“You’re not… You’re not disappointed?” I asked hesitantly. “You made this lovely declaration, and in return, I told you I was terrified.”
“So long as you haven’t ruled me out completely, I’m not disappointed. If all I wanted was aneasyrelationship, I’ve had plenty of opportunities. But I want you. Gloriously complicated you. You’re worth the wait.”
I wrapped my arms around his neck, clinging to him so tightly it was probably uncomfortable. Kit was everything I wanted.Everything.
And maybe, if I was brave enough, I’d be able to keep him.
Chapter 20
Kitparkedonmyparents’ street, and I reluctantly climbed out of the car, a bead of sweat already running down my back beneath my floral cotton sundress. I smoothed down the skirt before checking that my hair was still neatly smoothed back in a ponytail and my inoffensive blush-coloured lipstick hadn’t smudged. Better not to give my family any more ammo than necessary.
“You look beautiful,” Kit assured me, locking the car and coming around to offer me his hand.
For a few silent seconds, I just stared at him. He was clean-shaven for today, his hair perfectly styled into neat waves, and a duck egg blue shirt tastefully unbuttoned just enough to show off his unmarked throat.
He lookedperfect. So handsome ithurt.
In some ways, I’d grown so much from the person I’d been at eighteen. I didn’t fixate on my looks every hour of the day anymore. I didn’t derive my value or lack thereof from my appearance. I knew I had plenty to offer, no matter what I looked like.
But being back here messed with my head. There was a reason why I didn’t visit my youngest siblings at home.
Kit frowned. “Get those voices out of your head, they don’t deserve the space they’re taking up there. You. Are. Beautiful.”
“Thank you,” I rasped, slipping my hand into his, holding my head high and heading for the house. He’d already met Chelsea and Asher, so it wasn’t as though Jules and Layla would come as a total surprise to him.
Still, in the context of all of us, even without Calum here, the difference between myself and all of my siblings was stark. Wherever possible, I avoided being in the same place as all of them at once for my own self-esteem.
It was stiflingly hot today, the pavers beneath my sandals felt as though they were frying me from below while the scorching sun did its best to freckle me into oblivion from above.The melting makeup would really add to the effect,I thought morosely.
I didn’tlikethe melancholy nature of my thoughts. It reminded me of Margot from all those years ago, who’d tucked her tail between her legs and ran away in shame. Whatever else was going on, I wasn’tthatMargot anymore. I was accomplished, content, successful in my own right. Perhaps still a little bit of a people pleaser, but I was getting better. I couldn’t be the sister Layla expected me to be, but I was a good sister to Jules, Chelsea, and Asher.
