Page 8 of Vengeful Devotion
“What’s your name?” she asks.
“Oh, uh, Gemma. Gemma Rossi.”
“Gemma. That’s a pretty name. I’m Francine McBride. You’ll have to excuse my son. He can be a bit touchy.”
Warren scoffs. I’m surprised to hear that she’s his mother. They look nothing alike. Francine looks like she stepped out of a Martha Stewart magazine, while Warren looks like he came from the wrong side of the tracks.
“It’s okay. So, burgers and vanilla shakes?” I ask, doing my best to focus on the task at hand and not on dissecting my customers.
“Yes, please.”
“It’ll be right out.”
Tommy calls my name, letting me know my order is ready. I finish writing down their order before dropping it off at the kitchen and picking up the country fried steak.
As I walk up to the table, I realize the customer isn’t there. I’m not sure if I’m supposed to leave the plate or not. I turn back towards the counter, hoping to find Aggie for directions. But I run right into the customer, spilling hot gravy all over him and dropping the plate. It shatters at my feet.
“What the fuck?” he yells. “You bitch!”
“I’m so sorry. I didn’t see you.”
Aggie comes running over, grabbing a towel from her apron. “Are you okay, sir?”
“Do I look like I’m fucking okay? Your girl here just tried to scald me!”
“N-no. It was an accident, I swear.”
Aggie closes her eyes. I see the exact moment her patience runs out. That’s when I know. I’m done here.
“Go home, Gemma. You’re more trouble than you're worth.”
Tears well up in my eyes. The crunch of splintered glass beneath my feet is all that can be heard in the diner. Even the bell above the door has gone silent. Everyone is staring at me. Their eyes judging, thinking I must be an idiot because I can’t even carry plates correctly. My heart pounds. The walls close in on me, making it hard to breathe. I pull the apron off, tossing it to the floor and running out the door. The world spins. My body is full of panic, disorientating me. All I know is I need to get as far away from this place and my very public failure as I can.
Worthless.
Aggie’s words mix with Lonny’s. I’m never going to be good enough. What was I thinking? Lonny was right. He was being kind with his treatment of me. I’m never going to survive on my own. I’m too stupid. Too weak. Just like he said.
I walk down the street, wiping tears from my face. The sidewalk isn’t crowded with everyone focused on getting lunch. Guess I should be glad that my humiliation is limited to the diner. But all I can feel is the urge to end all this. To silence the pain buzzing through my veins. As much as that sounds appealing, I can’t break my promise to Lia. It’ll kill her. She worked hard to get me out of that house. I can’t let her down.
There’s an unexpected chill in the air. I hurry across the parking lot to my motel room, before the man at the desk can see me. I promised him I’d pay for another week after my shift since tomorrow is my checkout day. That was before I knew I’d be getting fired. Now, I don’t have enough money. With no way to earn anything else, I’m screwed. When I check out tomorrow, I’ll be on the streets.
The moment I close the door, I fall to my knees. My body feels like it’s being ripped apart by despair. I don’t know what I’m supposed to do. I can’t go on like this. But I can’t go back to Boston. There’s nowhere for me to run. No one for me to ask for help. I’m all alone. A knock interrupts my sobs. I take a deep breath, trying hard to put all those feelings back in their box. Trying hard to shove them down and hide them from whoever is at the door.
I open it, blinking the remaining tears back to see.
“Francine?”
“Hi, Gemma. You left this at the diner,” she says, handing me my bag.
“Oh, um, thank you, you didn’t need to do that.”
She laughs a little. “Can I come in?”
I look over my shoulder at the dingy motel room. It’s not much, but I don’t want to be rude.
“Uh, sure.”
Francine smiles at me, stepping over the threshold. She looks so out of place here. The diamonds on her hands are probably worth more than the entire motel.
