Page 47 of Fixed Up Ever After
Cuddling felt more intimate than the marathon of sex they just had. Perhaps it was because she was baring herself to him in a different way and letting her guard down. She hadn’t done that for a while, scared that any new person in her life would find a way to disappoint her. She was still waiting for the other shoe to drop because what she felt for Javi had to have an expiration date.
Unless…there didn’t have to be.
His arms provided the sense of safety she needed tonight to keep the doubts and regrets at bay. She couldn’t regret what they did today, but she would need to clarify what they were to each other. This was so much more than cute touches and secret glances, this was…something she wasn’t yet comfortable describing.
A part of her was scared to develop anything further with Javi. Was she truly ready to put herself out there again? Javi made her feel like the most interesting person on earth, but was that enough?
But another part of her was scared because she had once thought Archie would never hurt her. The two men couldn’t be more different, but putting her heart out on the line again came at a huge cost and she didn’t think she was ready to pay it yet.
“Sleep well, Lola,” Javi said, pulling her out of her opposing thoughts. His breathing slowed and she felt the soft rise and fall of his chest. Tonight had been amazing, even if the aftermath was scary. The negative thoughts tried to penetrate her mind, but she kept them at bay. Tomorrow she could worry about their future and feel her feelings. Tonight she would let the ignorance comfort her and think of Javi’s arms around her.
Within a few minutes, Lola fell into a dreamless sleep.
CHAPTER29
Javi
The soft thrumming of a guitar filled the air, breaking the silence of the morning. Lola squirmed in his arms, whining at the sudden intrusion of sound. At first, his sleepy brain conjured up an image of a mariachi band playing outside as if they were sent by their neighbors to congratulate them on their marathon of sex.
When the sound abruptly cut off only to start back up again, Javi realized his phone was going off. His body was wound tightly around Lola’s, so extricating his limbs from hers was no easy task, especially because he didn’t want to wake her up. He had shown little to no mercy to her yesterday and she needed the rest.
After exiting the bed and hoping he didn't jostle her too much, Javi grabbed his phone. The screen lit up with an incoming call and Ofelia’s picture popped up. His stomach dropped as dread and dad guilt threatened to consume him. When he agreed to be Lola’s date, he had made a promise to Camilia that he would call her every single day. And he had not lived up to that promise. The past few days came and went without a single call or text.
He wouldn’t be winning a best dad award anytime soon.
Grabbing a shirt and sweats from the floor, Javi got dressed at record speed and made his way outside onto the patio balcony in an effort to not disturb Lola’s sleeping form. Right before his phone cut off, he answered it. His sister’s frown greeted him. “You too busy to speak with your own family?” Her tone bordered on annoyance and his sister hardly ever lost his cool with him.
It was his stupid fault. He hadn’t been thinking about anything other than his feelings and the strong pull he felt toward Lola. While he was selfishly taking care of his own needs, he left Camilia to fend for herself with Ofelia. Being away for an entire week was going to be hard on her and yet he had done nothing to make it easier.
“Shit—I’m sorry, Ofi. How is she? Is everything alright? Do I need to come home?” His words were a jumbled mess and he tried to peer around Ofelia’s head, hoping to catch a glimpse of his daughter.
“No, no. None of that.” She sighed and ran a hand through her hair. “Sorry, Mav’s back at training today and I’m alone with the kids. I called papá for backup because Arturo is going to drive me to drink. This morning he thought it would be a good idea to wake me up by dropping a sopping wet towel on me and proceed to belly flop on my face.”
Despite his tense mood only moments ago, Javi couldn’t help but laugh. Arturo was a rambunctious kid, but apparently so was Maverick at this age. He also made a mental note to buy his sister dinner and books for having to take care of two kids. That sounded like a handful, especially when they were two and six.
“But Camilia has been asking about you. She wants to talk; do you have time?” she asked, and Javi saw his sister move through the house toward the room she had set up for Camilia.
“I have time. I’m so sorry again, Ofi. I should have been checking in.”
Ofelia waved away his apology. “Honestly, it’s fine. Camilia is doing great, but I know she will appreciate talking to you. Hey, Camilia.” Ofelia smiled, no longer looking at Javi but over the phone to where his daughter must be. “Papá is on the phone. Are you ready to talk?”
There was some shuffling and a black screen before a rosy-cheeked little girl popped up. Her beautiful curls were pulled back into a high-top ponytail with a few unruly strands crowning her face. She had on her favorite hoodie he had gotten at a gas station a few months ago with a unicorn riding a bike. The biggest smile greeted him, slamming in the knife of guilt. His sweet girl didn’t hold grudges, but he couldn’t shake the feeling of fucking up.
“Mija, how are you? Papá misses you so much.” A strange lump formed in his throat, but he coughed it away.
“I miss you too. This much!” she said, dropping the phone on her bed and holding her arms out wide. “But tía Ofi is taking us to the movies today. After Arturo has a nap or else he will be a grumpy monster like tío.” Javi heard Ofelia laugh outside the camera.
“That sounds like a lot of fun. And abuelo is going too?”
“Oh yes. And it’s my job to keep him from snoring in the movies.” She giggled and launched into her plan of how she was going to make that happen. While she spoke, Javi listened and nodded his head when appropriate. Inwardly, he wrestled with his guilt of missing out on these small moments, even though there would be plenty more.
Camilia then spoke to him about school and how she was doing with her sight words. How she almost had all of them correct, but still needed to work on a few. Ofelia made sure to read to her every night and Camilia retold the stories they read. Javi couldn’t help but smile when his daughter mentionedThe Giving Tree. He pictured Lola rolling her eyes and explaining how problematic the book was. Still, he wondered if Camilia would ever ask Lola to read it to her.
It terrified him how easily he could picture Lola in his life. Would she be okay with starting a relationship with a man who already had a child? And why the hell was he even thinking about any of this now? Deep down, in the pits of his lonely heart, Javi knew exactly why he could only think of a future with Lola.
How he didn’t want any other man to have her.
She was his and his alone.
