Page 38 of The Billionaire's Last-Minute Marriage
Pandora made a tiny, strangled sound and when he looked down at her he could see she was shaking her head, the strangest expression on her face.
‘Are you laughing? I’m making a very serious speech here and you’re somehow amused by all this?’
‘The exact opposite. I’m frankly amazed at the fact that I was just about to...’ She shook her head, the tiniest hitch in her breath the only outward sign that she was not amused at all. ‘You never contacted me, the entire time I was in Japan with Ran, apart from sending over information about the wedding. It’s like you weren’t even affected by anything that happened between us. And now you’ve decided on all this without even asking me what I want. So yes, I’m entitled to be upset.’
She was...upset? Hope bloomed in his chest like a weed, careening up the stony walls around his heart and finally crumbling them to dust. She had already told him that she loved him once...was he a fool to think that her love hadn’t completely died when he’d behaved so badly? He’d acted out of fear before, he had practically pushed her to leave. But now...he felt the significance of the moment stretch out before him like a murky precipice. There was no guarantee that she wouldn’t still walk away, but he had to try. He had to take that leap of faith and trust it wouldn’t destroy him.
Quickly, he stepped in front of her, blocking her from walking away from the raised podium they stood upon. He looked around them at the rose-covered archway and the candles flickering in the light twilight breeze.
Pandora felt the last tiny ember of hope she’d clung to that he’d missed her while she was gone over the past week fade, giving way to a torrent of white-hot anger. Howdaredhe? He had the gall to insist on this preposterous marriage deal in the first place, and now, barely a month later, when she was no longer useful to him, he was abandoning her as quickly as he could?
It had felt as though his words had come at her like arrows, hitting her squarely in the chest.
She shouldn’t feel so hurt by his offer of a divorce. It had always been going to happen in less than a year’s time. But hearing him say it so cavalierly, so soon, surrounded by this ridiculous wedding tent and what felt like a million of her favourite roses...she felt the last final piece of her heart shatter.
Unable to look up at him, she let the cold numbness that had threatened her all day finally take hold, steeling her features to blankness. Protecting her from falling down into a huddled pile of pain at his feet. But suddenly, the realisation of the ridiculousness of their situation dawned on her and she felt a semi-hysterical bubble of laughter escape her lips.
She covered her face with embarrassment, wishing she could simply click her fingers and return to the solitude of her room to have what was probably going to be a spectacular breakdown of sorts. She felt Xander move forward, the heat of him pressing along her bare arm making her jump with surprise.
‘Pandora...please, don’t cry. God, I’m messing all this up.’ He touched her hands, concern lacing his voice for a split second. ‘Wait, you’re...laughing?’
‘Sorry, I’m just...this is completely ridiculous.’ She shook off his hand as another bubble of laughter escaped her chest, sending a tear down her cheek. ‘We’re starring in our very own soap opera here. You do know that, don’t you? The jilted groom, jilting his replacement bride at the altar.’
He frowned at her words, looking almost hurt, which made absolutely no sense considering he was the one ending things between them. She felt unhinged and exhausted and, God, why was he still looking at her that way?
‘Jilting?’ he echoed. ‘Do you honestly think I would do that to you?’
She paused, something about his tone making her stand very still. He stood under the archway, looking like every fantasy bridegroom in her wildest dreams. But it was the look in his eyes that made her swallow hard. In all the months they’d worked together, she had never once seen Xander Mytikas admit fault or apologise the way he’d apologised to her tonight.
He’d practically begged for her forgiveness. And now, looking at him, steadfast under the arch where they’d been set to pledge their vows... She wondered if perhaps she’d got it all wrong. Still, she couldn’t quite bring herself to ask him. That small, shaky part of her had already taken a catastrophic bruising. So she did the next best thing and uncrossed her arms, letting them lie flat at her sides. She took one step towards him, then another, until finally they were only slightly more than arm’s width apart.
‘I don’t think you would hurt me like that on purpose, Xander,’ she said softly. ‘But the truth of the matter is, there is no reason for us to remain married now. I don’t even work for you any more.’
‘Without the deals and obligations...you can’t think of one reason why we should?’ he asked hoarsely.
He reached out and took her left hand in his, his thumb rubbing over the polished platinum rings on her third finger. ‘You want to know why I’ve been quiet? Why I have barely been able to trust myself to be around you without an audience? It’s because I’ve been wracking my brain to try to find a way to keep you. I just didn’t think I deserved you.’
‘Oh.’ The single syllable left her on a rush of breath and she felt the world slow right down to a fine point. Everything else fell away and suddenly all she could see was Xander. For the first time since she’d walked down the steps, she looked at him, really looked at him.
There were fine lines of pressure around his mouth and a tiny unshaven patch of hair just under his ear, he had dark circles under his eyes and he looked thinner, as if he’d been exercising too much and forgetting to eat. Goodness...he looked just as terrible as she felt. How had she not noticed that?
All this time she’d been operating under the impression that she had been the fool who had fallen face first into love, but now as she looked into his eyes... That tiny spark of hope winked back to life within her chest once again.
‘Knowing you were across the world in Japan this past week has been the most tortured I’ve felt in a long time. I know why you left. You are immensely talented and passionate and you shouldn’t have been sitting around waiting to be wheeled out as my society bride. I was selfish to not continue to use your tremendous talents. I’m so sorry. Your replacement is utterly useless, if that’s any consolation.’
She opened her mouth to respond but felt his index finger press gently against her lips, his left hand reaching for hers, his thumb smoothing over the rings that she had yet to remove.
‘Pandora... I woke every morning this past week alone and surrounded by your scent. At first it made me angry, knowing you had left me. But as I calmed and your scent began to fade with every day...’ He looked up, his eyes dark and earnest. ‘I think it was while I burrowed my face into that damned pillow, trying to get one more breath of you... I think that was when I knew.’
‘You knew that you wanted more?’ she whispered, needing to clarify, needing to know exactly what he meant.
‘So much more.’ He lifted her hand to his lips, inhaling softly against her skin, breathing her in. ‘I don’t just want you in my bed for a week,agape mou. I was stupid to ever think that was all we could be. You are worth more to me than I could ever confine to one night, one week, or even one year.’
‘Are you saying that you...?’ She breathed in, feeling her heartbeat thrum so hard in her throat she felt a little dizzy. ‘Xander... I need you to be clear before I...’
His eyes darkened. ‘Before you what, Quinn?’
‘Before I do something utterly ridiculous like jump your bones right here on this altar. It might not be a church but I’m pretty sure it would still be illegal.’
