Page 36 of The Billionaire's Last-Minute Marriage
But the look on Pandora’s face when she’d spoken those words to him on the train in Japan...she hadn’t looked weak. She had been glorious. Her silver eyes incandescent and aglow with the terrible truth of her heart, even when he’d tried to extinguish that flame. His fists tightened on his knees as he leaned forward, his forehead pressing hard against the cold window of the helicopter as the city lights began to blur in the distance below.
This was madness, thinking that a man like him had any right to her heart. He had broken her enough already and for once he would do the right thing. If she was no longer bound to him through their deal, she would be set free.
He needed to set her free.
Pandora rose from her chair, taking in her appearance with swift efficiency and calmly telling the stylist that she would finish dressing alone.
If they had any complaints, they didn’t voice them. The kind-eyed make-up artist took charge in shooing them out and made sure to ask her if she needed anything before he left himself. Then she was alone, in blissful silence.
She felt a coldness settle over her as she focused on removing some of the heavier make-up and curling her hair around her face. Simple pink pearl earrings adorned her ears and a matching necklace sat just above her collarbone. The dress she’d chosen for the rehearsal was a blush pink shift that teamed beautifully with flat golden pumps that sparkled in the light as she turned from side to side before finally leaving the confines of her room.
Show time.
She was infinitely glad that she hadn’t been pressured to wear heels as the steps already felt unsteady beneath her feet as she descended. Her heart thumped hard in her chest as she spied Xander waiting for her in the foyer of the venue, his back turned as he studied the glass in his hands. Whiskey, she realised with disappointment. Was he dreading the spectacle of pledging himself to her in front of his precious society? Was he worried she would embarrass him and his image?
For a moment, she briefly contemplated running back to her room to compose herself, but then he looked up and their eyes locked and she felt something within her melt.
She had seen Xander in a suit a thousand times since the day they’d first met, but the look on his face was what caught her breath. There was a level of heat there that seemed to burn through the fabric of her dress, touching her very heart. It should be a crime for a man to look the way he did in this moment.
She reached the bottom step and he was right there, taking her hand in his but not pulling her any closer. The foyer was just filled with a handful of staff members, readying the place for the rehearsal dinner. There was no need to put on a show. Yet she ached to reach up and touch his jaw, to kiss his lips and get carried away in that electric heat of desire that always seemed to end with them in a tangle of limbs in a bed, on a desk or even on the floor on occasion.
But something was different today. For someone who had always struggled to read people’s meaning in their words, she had always been extra sensitive to their moods. But with Xander, it sometimes felt as if he had become an extension of her, as if she could feel his energy simply by being in the same room as him. In Japan, that feeling had only intensified, making her lose focus and fuelling her anxiety whenever he’d behaved in a way she hadn’t expected. Like right now.
‘You look beautiful,’ he said, guiding her along the hall that led to the outdoor ceremony area. He paused just before they exited the double doors, where their celebrant waited along with the events team. Xander had made sure to send Pandora detailed reports of every decision that was made, ensuring that she knew what to expect. Slowly she had begun to understand the enormity of what she had agreed to. This was to be a finely executed event. But it would be okay, she told herself.
Xander would be by her side. She was simply playing a different role, just like the ones she had played all her life. The roles that smoothed out her edges and made her more palatable to others, the masks she wore to stop herself from standing out or being an embarrassment to the people she cared about. And she did care about Xander, probably far more than was sensible for a woman who had entered into a marriage with a one-year expiry date.
One year.
During her time alone in Japan she had stopped thinking about the fact that they had set a limit on their arrangement. But clearly he’d never forgotten.
She had never dreamed of more for herself than her studies and visiting her family, challenging herself to move to new countries and adapt. She had been content before meeting Xander, before he had shown her just what it meant to feel connected with someone in such a primal way. She felt as if before their first kiss, she had just been existing. From the moment his lips had touched hers, he had unleashed something inside her. He had opened up some hidden box within her soul and now there was no way to put it all back again. But still, a foolish hope stubbornly bloomed within her, growing and moving towards him like a flower seeking the sun.
It wasn’t fair to him, putting him in such a position. He had never offered to be her sun or her moon. He hadn’t even offered to be her husband, in truth. They had gone from a fraught working relationship to the tentative alliance of their temporary marriage then somehow had become lovers before either of them had had the chance to catch their breath.
They walked out into the evening light and she was stunned to see the ceremony had been completely set up in the few hours she’d been holed away upstairs with the styling team. The long lawn now boasted satin-covered chairs and flower stands spilling over with yellow roses. Her breath caught. Had he done that? The idea that he would request her favourite flower on purpose was a reach, the more likely situation was that an event planner had chosen them in pure coincidence. But the lawn was spilling with them, fragrant arrangements filling every corner.
Love for him filled her chest and she fought the urge to claim him once again, to demand that they give up on this foolish charade made up of restraint and rules that she knew neither of them wanted.
Xander might care about the propriety of their arrangement, but she didn’t. Call her impulsive, but if this was a terrible decision, she wanted to dive in head first.
What if this connection between them was meant to be more, what if this marriage was meant to be real? The moment she felt the question take shape in her mind, she felt it fill up and expand. She couldn’t marry him like this, she couldn’t give up on the chance that they might actually be something to one another outside this deal.
She felt the pressure of reality weighing her down with every step, crushing her with expectation and responsibility.
Suddenly her feet refused to move.
She heard Xander ask if she was okay as though he were on the opposite side of a wall, while her thoughts swirled and caved in upon her with raucous vengeance.
The event planner smiled brightly, explaining that the usual series of vows would follow. The woman’s shrill excited voice was impossible to keep up with, along with the banging from the chairs still being arranged on the lawn. So many chairs. So many strangers, watching her, wondering how on earth someone like her had wound up married to a handsome Greek billionaire.
Quirky and scatterbrained...autistic spectrum disorder...
‘I’ll get you to stand right here.’ The woman nudged Pandora lightly on her shoulder, placing her at an angle to Xander’s left. Pandora felt her mind grow foggy with the effort of withstanding her own panic. Still, the event planner continued to chatter mindlessly while Xander nodded, his hands stuffed into the pockets of his designer trousers. She focused on the watch upon his wrist, noting how dull the metal looked. How out of place it seemed. Was this how people would always see her? She had thought she was immune to the pain of being an object of public speculation. But that was before...
Before she’d realised that it wasn’t just her that was affected by public opinion of their marriage. By the public opinion of her. Before she’d cared about Xander’s happiness so much, a happiness that was directly affected by his social reputation.
The thought came with blinding clarity, like a sudden beam of torchlight. Painful and impossible to ignore. She knitted her hands together, wondering how on earth she had ever thought she could maintain the façade of a perfect wife for him. It would be laughable, really, if it weren’t so impossibly sad.
