Page 31 of The Billionaire's Last-Minute Marriage
Time and time again this man had intimated that he was incapable of caring for others or falling in love, just like his father. But the way he cared for her, the way he made love to her... The way he was looking at her right now as he lifted her into his arms and carried her across the room to place her carefully on the bed... He murmured something unintelligible in Greek, pressing his face to her hair and inhaling deeply. The action seemed shockingly intimate, even in light of the many other, more scandalous things they had done together in the past week. She suddenly wished she had put more effort into learning his native language.
Of course, her first experience of falling in love would be with a man determined to keep her at arm’s length. She closed her eyes in despair. She’d tried to protect herself, but it was far too late for that now. What had happened in Japan was going to have to stay in Japan. It was what she’d insisted on, after all.
‘What’s wrong?’ Xander asked as he drew back and looked at her face.
‘I’ve broken your rule,’ she said simply.
Xander stilled, almost afraid to take another breath until she clarified that point.
‘Broken my rule, how?’ he heard himself say, his body still and unmoving on the large bed. Pandora stood up, folding her arms over her chest and walking over to the window. The world whizzed by in a blur of red leaves and blue skies but Xander’s gaze was glued to Pandora’s face and the whirlwind of emotions passing through it one by one until she finally closed her eyes.
Not liking being blocked out, he stood up before he could even remind himself of all the reasons why he didn’t really want to push her for an answer. Why he should leave her to compose herself and they could brush over her misstep and pretend it hadn’t happened.
‘I’m not just addicted to this, Xander. I’m...’ She shook her head, swallowing hard before she turned back to face him. ‘I’m in love with you.’
‘No, you’renot,’ he responded, the reflexive answer escaping his lips before he had a chance to catch himself. He’d seen her wince at his words, seen the pain on her face even as she closed her eyes against it.
‘Is it really so impossible to believe?’ she asked. She shook her head, her eyes meeting his for the briefest seconds, before sliding away. ‘I’ve...never said that to anyone before.’
His thoughts were consumed by the need to pull her back to him, to demand that they moved past this conversation and all the jagged edges it unleashed within him. Moments ago, they had been wrapped in one another—how had it come to this?
‘I don’t understand you,’ she said. ‘You have let Zeus take so much from you. He is dead, Xander, and yet you still use your fear of being like him to keep everyone at arm’s length. I believe that your actions with Eros were not done out of selfishness, but of love. You don’t have to keep shutting everyone out, Xander.’
He shook his head, words failing him as he reached for her. He would just kiss her, he decided. He would kiss away these doubts and remind her of what was good between them, what could still be good...
‘No.’ She pushed his hand away. Steel laced that single word, her shoulders squaring, shutting him out further.
Xander froze, his arm slowly dropping back to his side.
‘I can’t keep doing this. I will play my part when we return to New York,’ she continued as he remained silent. ‘But what has happened here in Japan between us...will stay here.’
‘Is that what you want?’ he finally gritted out. ‘That we leave it like this?’
‘I’m still technically your wife for the next year. Did you expect me to just keep sleeping with you indefinitely?’ She swallowed, her lower lip trembling. ‘This is how it needs to end. I’m ending it.’
He looked up at the ceiling, rage threatening to consume him. He wasn’t capable of returning her feelings, whatever she said. He’d never been cut out for relationships, he was too selfish, too cold and focused on growing his empire. He had seen what loving his father had done to his own mother, to most of the women Zeus had ever been with. To take Pandora’s love would be to doom her to a life of heartbreak. She deserved somebody more worthy of her love than him, maybe someone closer to her own age.
Of course, she was right that this should end now, but he wasn’t ready to do without the pleasure they’d found in each other’s arms just yet. If that made him totally selfish, then so be it. He’d had nearly a week of making love to her, of waking up to her face each morning. This...infatuation should have begun to feel less intense by now.
He’d never had much willpower when it came to the things he enjoyed most and Pandora Quinn had become the most delectable dessert to his starved, sugar-crazed palate. But truthfully, he knew that if the choice was his...he wouldn’t end it until they were both in ruins and she hated him for not being enough for her, for being unable to love her back the way she deserved.
So in the end, he simply nodded once, his own pride forcing him to walk away, even as hurt crossed her beautiful face.
CHAPTER TWELVE
PANDORAWINCED,STRUGGLINGfor the third time to comprehend what the handsome make-up artist was saying to her. The younger man frowned, looking over at his assistant with a thinly veiled exasperation. But just when she thought she was about to receive another snarky comment, the younger man directed his gaze at the woman who was blow-drying her hair to within an inch of its life. He made a small gesture towards the hairstylist and all at once the incessant noise in the room seemed to dip and Pandora let out a heaving sigh of relief.
Her thoughts had been a swirling vortex of anxiety all day. All contact with her husband over the past week since their return to New York had been limited to a few wedding-related email updates. He’d left every morning before she woke and not returned home until well after midnight. She should be glad that dealing with his brothers and the inheritance was taking up his time and giving them space in the aftermath of her mortifying declaration of unrequited love. She should be busying herself with her own plans to accept Ran’s job offer once the wedding was over. But she couldn’t stop herself from growing steadily more annoyed with Xander’s ice-man demeanour, wanting to poke at him like a child at an anthill. If she’d thought he’d been difficult before, when he had simply been her boss...that was nothing compared to the intense way she caught him staring at her every time they had the misfortune of being together in the same room.
On one such occasion, she’d got into the elevator to attend her final dress fitting only to have him step in at the last moment. The tension on the long ride down to the ground floor from his penthouse had been almost unbearable. He’d asked her how she was doing with the wedding preparations and she’d responded honestly that she was feeling quite overwhelmed. He’d nodded, but said nothing more.
He had looked tired, and she’d longed to reach out and brush the hair from his brow. But she’d remained still and calm, both of them silent for the rest of the journey out to their separate chauffeur-driven cars.
The next day, she’d been assigned a virtual assistant to filter out the remaining calls and tasks that she could read through and confirm or amend via email. Other than today’s final hair and make-up trial, she had nothing left to do other than show up on the day. There were no social events or dinners, no reason for her to stand by Xander’s side and play the part of his adoring wife. She should be relieved he’d taken the pressure off, she realised. In a way, it felt strangely close to being cared for, though she knew that wasn’t his intention. He was likely just trying to ensure there were no more embarrassing moments or public arguments to put the illusion of his perfect marriage in jeopardy.
Her thoughts were so busy, she almost didn’t hear the huddled conversation going on between the make-up artist and hairstylist in the background.
‘We can’t both work on her at the same time, it will be too much for her,’ the woman said, then winced. ‘Poor girl is probably already uncomfortable.’
