Page 14 of His Housekeeper's Twin Baby Confession
But nevertheless her urge to self-protect was stronger than her instinct that she could trust him.
‘I’m sorry but I can’t agree to do this. I don’t need to think about it.’
Immediately a knot of regret clutched at her gut. She pushed it down.
His expression didn’t falter. ‘If that’s your final decision then I accept it.’
His gaze was steady. Dark. All-encompassing. They were outside on the terrace but she felt she needed air.
She stood up. ‘I think I’ll take my break now, if that’s all right, s—’ She’d been about to say,sir, but stopped herself.
‘Of course—take all the time you need. I have to go into the office for the rest of the day, and I’ll be eating out this evening.’
Carrie left the lunch table with her half-eaten plate of food and went inside. There was a housemaid who came every day—a friendly young woman. She was in the kitchen now, and Carrie instructed her to clean up once Massimo had finished his lunch, and to make sure the chef knew that he was dining out this evening.
Then she made her way straight down to ground level and stepped outside, where she was met with a wall of still, humid air. Not the clear, refreshing oxygen she needed so she could try and wrap her brain around what Massimo had just asked of her. And her answer. Which had been met with equanimity.
She bought an iced tea from a nearby coffee shop and made her way over to Central Park, looking for even the smallest of breezes under the shade of the massive trees. She sat on a bench and watched people go by, sipping her drink.
A pair of young lovers, hand in hand, clearly besotted, caught her attention. Her heart spasmed. Growing up with her mother’s stoicism after being dumped so comprehensively, Carrie had always prided herself on not having any illusions when it came to love and fairy tales of happy endings. But when she’d been vulnerable, and her husband had used all his manipulative charm to seduce her, she’d allowed herself to believe briefly that maybe it would be different for her.
But it hadn’t been, and she should have known better. There was no such thing as romance. Only people who want to control and dominate others...take advantage of any vulnerability. There was no equality. Only power games. And she’d never be on the wrong side of that equation again.
She’d had to refuse Massimo, to see how he’d react. Like some kind of test. And because she’d sensed no passive aggression that might threaten to blow up at a later point she couldn’t help but wonder if she’d overreacted.
As if to mock her for her cynicism, the young lovers had stopped to kiss now, and it was sweet yet passionate. They were oblivious to voyeurs. Before she could deny it, Carrie felt a sense of yearning. An ache for something she’d told herself didn’t exist. Maybe it did for some people, who weren’t damaged or driven to manipulate and dominate.
Then a mother passed her, with a baby in a stroller, and an even bigger ache gripped Carrie right in her womb. She put a hand there unconsciously, as if that might dim the pain. That was when she realised that it wasn’t sharp, as it had used to be. It was softer. Still there, but not so acute.
Time really was a healer. Such a cliché. But she couldn’t deny feeling a sense of peace after four long years of hiding and licking her wounds.
Maybe, whispered a little voice,just maybe it’s time to stop hiding yourself away? Maybe it’s time to live a little again?
A tiny bud of something light unfurled inside her. Along with a frisson of electricity at the thought of being brave enough to accept Massimo’s invitation.
If there was a way to start embracing life again, then surely standing beside Massimo, Lord Linden, had to be a pretty audacious place to start?
CHAPTER THREE
MASSIMOWASDISTRACTED,and he’d been distracted all afternoon and evening. It wasn’t every day that a woman turned him down. Thatanyoneturned him down. He felt irritated with himself at the fact that it bothered him. Carrie was his housekeeper—clearly she was being professional and he should commend her for it.
If he’d been trying to test her she’d passed with flying colours. What he had asked of her was beyond the realms of regular service and he knew well that his motives weren’t as straightforward as he’d led her to believe. He’d hoped that if she said yes, then she would lose whatever fascination she held for him.
More than fascination.
He shifted in his seat in the back of his car as it made its way through the night-time Manhattan traffic.
He’d just endured an interminable dinner where, as his peers had grown drunker and drunker, he’d found his mind wandering back to Carrie. The look of shock on her face earlier when he’d suggested eating together. The way she’d sat there so primly. The way she’d spoken to him, asking him things no one else ever had.
She intrigued him.
But perhaps she’d sensed his interest and her low-key and humble demeanour was an act.
A part she’d been playing for four years just to engage his interest?
The voice mocked his cynicism, but at the same time, considering the lengths some women had gone to to get his attention, it was not entirely beyond the realm of possibility.
But he couldn’t deny that she’d first intrigued him four years ago, when she’d come to be interviewed for the position as his housekeeper. So it had been brewing under the surface for a long time.
