Page 55 of His Housekeeper's Twin Baby Confession
Massimo made a face and took a sip of wine. He put down the glass. ‘I can take it or leave it. Christmas when I was growing up was chaotic, so I’ve never really had the traditional experience.’ Almost as an afterthought, he said, ‘Except for once.’
‘Oh?’ Carrie had to admit she was intrigued by any glimpse into Massimo’s early life.
‘Well, Christmas with my parents was all or nothing. They either lavished us with gifts when they were organised and had remembered, or we were left with the nanny while they went on holiday. But one year the nanny couldn’t stay with us, so we went to a schoolfriend’s house to spend it with his family.’
‘What was that like?’
‘A revelation. For the first time in our lives Ric and I witnessed a functional family. A loving family. Who celebrated Christmas the same way every year. Very simple, nothing fancy—the boy was at our school on a scholarship—and yet when it came to it his parents were the ones who offered to take us in for the Christmas holidays.’
‘Did you enjoy it?’
‘It was a little unsettling—like being an alien beamed down from another planet and learning how to behave like normal people. Playing games. Watching movies. There was none of the high-octane glamour and chaos that we usually witnessed. I think Ric discovered drugs for the first time at one of our parents’ parties.’
Carrie couldn’t help feeling a pang at the thought of two young boys feeling so lost in a normal situation that most people took for granted.
She said, ‘Christmas when I was growing up was just me and my mother. We didn’t have enough money for this kind of feast, but she always tried her best so that we’d have some kind of treat. And we’d watch movies. She loved all the old classics, likeIt’s A Wonderful LifeandMiracle on 34th Street.’
‘You miss her?’
Carrie nodded, avoiding Massimo’s eye. ‘She was all I had. She was wonderful.’
‘You were lucky to know a mother’s love. Our mother was a kind person, but she didn’t have the ability to be responsible. She’d been totally pampered as a child, and yet her own parents had farmed her out to nannies and boarding schools. She literally didn’t know what to do with us. And her fragile emotional state meant she was very susceptible to alcohol and drugs. Our father’s philandering only made things worse.’
Carrie looked at Massimo. He was staring into his wine glass.
She said, ‘That must have been tough.’
He shrugged. ‘It was all we knew.’
He looked at her and Carrie was caught by his dark gaze, turning golden in the low lights and the fire in the background.
He said, ‘You must have been young when you married.’
‘I was eighteen.’
Massimo made a faint whistling sound. ‘That’syoung.’
‘My mother had recently died. I was feeling a little...lost. Vulnerable. I was an easy target for someone who recognised weakness and wanted to exploit it and exert control.’
‘You weren’t weak. You were grieving.’
Carrie let his words fall into that place inside her where she’d punished herself for so long. They didn’t sting. They were like a balm.
‘I let him in and he took advantage. That’s why I won’t marry again. I don’t trust myself not to let it happen again. The thought is...terrifying.’
‘So you’d prefer our children to grow up with separate parents?’
Carrie tensed. ‘You’d have access. Separate parents has to be healthier than a marriage made for the sake of the children. I could keep—’
Massimo cut her off. ‘Do not say you could keep working here. It’s not feasible Carrie. Not any more. You’re already showing a little.’
Carrie was feeling claustrophobic. ‘The staff don’t have to find out the babies are yours.’
The sudden tension in the room crackled.
Massimo stood up. ‘These babies are the heirs to the Linden fortune and a legacy that stretches back to the Middle Ages. You’d deny them that?’
Instinctively Carrie put her hand on her belly, as if to shield the babies from Massimo’s terrifying words. ‘I... I hadn’t thought about it like that, to be honest.’
