Page 58 of The Governess and the Brooding Duke
‘Was there a man back in Scotland?’
Her face went ashen. As if a light had been snuffed out, and he hated that.
‘I was thirteen when I left,’ she said.
A girl. Close enough to Elizabeth’s age.
‘And you have managed to gain that much education in so few years?’
‘Yes. As I have been teaching the children, when something feels like a gift, when you never felt owed it, or guaranteed, it feels like a treasure. And you do not squander such treasure.’
‘You learned everything you could?’
‘Everything. I did at least twice the amount of schoolwork every year, and I did not leave on school holidays. I was fortunate. A rare thing, for a girl to be able to be educated in such a fashion, and there are few places that provide such. My family never could have—never would have—but the leader of my clan saw potential in me and honoured my dreams.’
‘And you knew then that you wished to forgo a traditional life? No husband or family?’
He knew everyone in society. And he was tired of them. It was all games and doublespeak. All completely disingenuous. They all knew each other and knew of each other. Everyone knew his father had been a monster, but his father had been a duke. So nothing had been done.
It had been known to many that Jane was occupied elsewhere. But not to him. He commanded respect, unless there was some greater social amusement at work.
He was tired of everyone in his acquaintance.
But he did not know Mary.
And he felt compelled to know her more. It was the first time in so many years he had felt that way about anyone.
‘A life as a wife is a life spent in a cage. And while in your part of society that cage is often an especially lovely one, in the world I’m from, it is not. There was no future for me there.’
‘Some might argue that life itself is a cage regardless. We must all play a role, after all.’
‘Some might argue that, I suppose. But a duke is in perhaps a rather interesting position to attempt to argue from. You are the keeper of these things. Much more so than most.’
‘I am the keeper of an ancient title that must be carried on. There is duty and propriety that I must observe, whether you believe that to be true, or a burden, or not.’
‘But you have choice, and the way that the world would respond to you would be entirely different than a woman who made the same choices. You are correct, there is an element of a cage whatever I do. Whatever a woman does. But I have the freedom of my time when I am in my room alone. And I would not barter that.’
‘And will you tell my daughter these things?’
‘Your daughter will likely be happier if she makes a good match. Most girls dream of finding a husband. I lived a life that made that dream quite impossible. But you... Surely you know the reputation of any man and his family who might seek her hand in the years to come. Surely you will be able to protect her.’
Everything in him went grim. Because he could hear what she was saying. Really hear it.
A marriage to a man like his own father was a life sentence to misery. His mother had lived that misery. He would never, ever consign his daughter to such a fate, and if he were to discover that her husband raised his fists to her, he would kill him.
But he could see then the concerns that she spoke of, clearly.
He did not worry about such a thing for Michael. Michael who would be the Duke.
But Elizabeth would have to make a good match, and that meant so much more than society defined it as.
‘I take your meaning,’ he said.
‘I’m glad you do.’
She was a woman who had seen cruelty. He could see that clearly.
‘It is time, likely, for the children to get back to their lessons.’
