Page 81 of Secrets of the Brother
I blinked several times, hating the heavy, caked feel of my lashes as the tear-soaked mascara weighed them down. “I know exactly what’s happening here. You’re trying to bully me just like my parents. Well, I won’t stand for it.”
“No. Your parents want to use you. I’m trying to protect you. There’s a difference.”
“I fail to see it.”
He raised an eyebrow. “Take off that dress and I’ll show you.”
“This is absurd. Being married to you didn’t protect Renata.” It was cruel, but I was desperate for him to see reason.
His jaw tightened. “That was different, and you know it. Renata got herself killed because of the people she crossed. Your parents are trying to drag you into that same trap, but I’ll be damned if I let that happen.”
“I already told you in the church. We’re finished. Done. It’s over. I’m not your responsibility!”
With a frustrated sigh, he tossed the belt aside. “Fine. Have it your way.” He then turned his back on me and walked out of the room, into the en suite bathroom.
My chest tightened. I should be taking advantage of his absence to grab the key and escape, but all I could do was stand there, dumbfounded.
I swallowed past the lump in my throat as fresh tears formed. I bit the inside of my cheek until I tasted blood, but the shock of pain did nothing to dull the torrent of conflicting emotions spinning around in my stomach so violently I wanted to vomit.
I reached out blindly for something to hold on to. My fingers grasped the heavy maroon and gold brocade drapes which framed the massive arched windows.
The realization that I had been fighting him all this time as some form of test… a test he just failed…hit me with sickening clarity. Part of me wanted to make him hurt and suffer for the pain he had caused me. Another part wanted to make him provethat it was me he had always wanted, not my sister.
I had wanted him to fight for me… to choose me this time.
And now it really was over. For real this time. I couldn’t complain. I had told him emphatically over and over and over again that he no longer meant anything to me, that I didn’t want him, that I had moved on.
I couldn’t expect the man to read my mind when I didn’t even know it myself.
One moment I loved him more than life itself, and the next I hated him.
I covered my mouth to stifle a sob.
I really thought….
I guess I was stupid for thinking….
Oh God.
It was over. No mental tricks. No what ifs. No maybes.
That was the double-edged sword with closure. You thought you wanted it. You thought you needed it, but you didn't realize that it took away that tiny kernel of hope, that silly fantasy that kept you going, that maybe…one day….
I just… I really believed he was going to fight for me, for us… this time.
Which was insane, since I wasn’t even sure I wanted there to be an us.
Except that I did… maybe.
Dammit. Everything was so confused and jumbled.
I squeezed my eyes shut as I lowered my head.
I didn’t hear him approach.
He swept me into his arms before I had a chance to object.
“What are you doing?”
