Page 12 of Secrets of the Brother
I swallowed past the lump in my throat. “So am I.”
* * *
To avoidanyone overhearing our conversation, we led Benito down to the wine cellars located below my house. Similar to the rooms underneath the villa, these were essentially man-made caves carved out of rock over a couple thousand years ago.
Ancient soundproofing.
My brother Cesare was already down there, along with my cousin Matteo and his father, my Uncle Benedict.
My father’s older brother had traveled down from the family’s properties in the north, as a show of support.
Since he was somewhat infamous in our family for being a curmudgeon who hated society and preferred the company of the champion horses he raised, it was a quiet testament to how much trouble I was in that he made an appearance for this sham funeral, especially since he hadn’t bothered to attend my sham wedding.
The spitting image of my father, he crossed the room and handed me a glass of Scotch he had poured from a bottle he must have snatched from the bar upstairs. “Drink. I have a feeling you’re going to need it,” he said as he clapped me on the shoulder.
He then made the rounds, splashing Scotch into everyone’s empty glasses.
I took the etched crystal glass and nodded but didn’t drink.
I couldn’t stop thinking about Bianca.
Christ, she looked even more beautiful in person than I remembered, which was saying a lot since her beauty had reached idolatry proportions in my imagination.
There wasn’t a day, an hour, a minute that had gone by that I hadn’t thought about her.
Even her most mundane daily activities consumed me.
What was she eating?
What was she reading?
I never looked at a clock without calculating the time difference between Italy and New York and comparing it to what she would be doing in that moment.
Bianca would be sleeping right now.
Bianca would be in her graphic design class right now.
Bianca would be… with another man right now.
The last possibility was what had kept me up at night. It was what had kept me reaching for the bottle more often than I liked. I was shocked I wasn’t a complete raging alcoholic by now.
I probably would be if I hadn’t takencertain measures.
I wasn’t proud of what I’d done.
Hell, fucking Renata and getting her pregnant was just the tip of the iceberg.
If Bianca knew the lengths I’d gone to….
I glanced down at the amber liquid in my glass and raised it to my lips, savoring the burn as it flowed down my throat.
She could never find out.
It was a secret I kept, even from my close family.
Bianca only thought she was angry with me now.
If only she knew….
