Page 103 of The Time It Takes
“A pleasure,” Oliver states with a tight smile. Julian nods his agreement all while studying him closely.
Here comes that instinct to run again, but I shove it away. I do eye the door, though. Just in case.
I chew on my bottom lip as both men go back to sizing each other up. I don’t think it’s necessarily in a bad way, but since I arrived with Oliver, I know Julian is curious about him—and well, alright fine, Oliver might be considering a pissing contest according to the vein that looks like it wants to leave his neck.
“I assume my mother has helped you settle in?” Oliver asks.
Julian slides his hands into the pockets of his slacks. “She did. I suppose we should be thanking you as well.” He bumps his shoulder into mine as he smiles down at me.
I frown. “Um.” I glance between them. “Sorry, I’m confused. What’s happening?”
“Mrs. Grayson said you told her about my work, and she thought about inviting me to showcase it at an event for charity. So, then she googled me—or rather how to reach me and now I’m here.Surprise.” The look of his genuine excitement makes me smile.
“Hm. Then where aremythanks?” I ask him.
A playful gleam lights up his eyes. “Your thanks are in a box in our room.”
“My mother placed you two in the same room?” Oliver’s voice booms over the silence surrounding us in the lobby. He doesn’t even try to hide how much he hates that idea.
Julian’s eyes dart between us curiously.
“It’s fine,” I find myself stating and cringe, avoiding eye contact with Oliver.
“It’s not like they haven’t shared one before,” Beth interjects, checking her nails. She tries to play it off as playful, but Julian catches it. Her presence isreallystarting to annoy me.
Julian studies me for a moment, and I’m thankful when he says, “Ah, yes well you know artists—always starving. Budgeting is a must.”
The corners of my mouth lift, but when I look at Oliver he’s not amused in the least.
Julian sweeps a hand over the lapel of his jacket. He looks down at me. “I think I’m going to turn in for the night, meet you up there?” He side-eyes Oliver quickly and the understanding when he looks back at me makes me want to hug him for it.
Knowing that’s not such a good idea, I nod and reach out, squeezing his forearm instead. Once he reaches the elevator and the door closes behind him, I give Beth a pointed look and step toward her. “You can save your little snide comments. You involve Julian in the issues you have with me again and we’ll have an entirely different problem.” I offer her my bestfuck with me and find outsmile.
She rolls her eyes like she couldn’t care less, and I nearly choke on the laugh in my throat. The absolute nerve of her. When I look back at Oliver, his eyes are focused on the floor.
His voice is a dead calm when he says, “Give us a moment.”
Beth’s mouth falls open when she realizes he’s talking to her. She places a hand on his shoulder. “I’ll grab my bag from the bar, and I’ll wait in the penthouse.” My jaw cracks from how hard I clench it. Though, she didn’t sayourpenthouse, it still makes me uneasy.
It seems that Oliver and I are sitting in the same boat—breaking other hearts in hopes to save our own.
I always thought of love to be a selfless thing, but maybe the books I’ve been reading are wrong. Maybe love is being selfish in a sacrificial way. Maybe that’s why it’s so terrifying. When you love someone, you never think it’ll hurt someone else. You don’t think love will hurt after you’ve found it, but it does. No matter what, it seems like you can never stop fighting for it. Love is a war zone with casualties, but those casualties deserve to find it too—to find the kind of love that makes you entirely selfish in the pursuit of it, but selfless toward the one you tried so hard to find.
I stopped looking for love a long time ago because I had already found it. I found it in green eyes, dimples, and a tattoo of a butterfly with a broken wing. I stopped looking because there was nothing else to find. My world begins and ends with the man who used to be my best friend. I’m finally ready for it to begin again, whatever the cost.
Without saying anything, Oliver turns and walks away. I follow him quietly down a wide hallway, knowing he wants me to follow him. I’m terrified at what he’s going to say to me. I’m terrified of what I’m going to say to him. This only reminds me how much we still need to discuss. I stare at him and sense the tension coming off his body. I’m not sure what his mood is or what he’s feeling about the situation we’ve found ourselves in.
When he pushes open a door, it leads to the stairwell. When the metal door slams shut behind us, I feel locked inside.
He faces away from me as he runs his hands through his hair and down his face. I cross my arms and wait.
When he turns to face me, he looks like a wreck. For the first time since I’ve been back, he looks overwhelmed and utterly defeated. My heart begins to sink.
Before I can consider anything else, Oliver advances toward me and forces me to take backward steps until I’m trapped between him and the railing when he smashes his mouth into mine. My hands fall behind me, gripping the cold black metal to steady myself. Oliver’s fingers dig into my hips as his lips maneuver over mine. It’s quick and brutal. I realize it’s a reminder. I hold onto him like a lifeline, taking what he gives me and giving it back just as fiercely.
He yanks himself away, his chest rising and falling at an uneven pace. He takes a few deep breaths and pinches the bridge of his nose. I stare at him, still feeling the weight of his kiss on my lips.
He looks back at me and says the last thing I thought he would. “Tell me about him.”
