Page 74 of The Shadows Between Us
“Oh, I’m having a dreadful time of it.”
“How can that be?”
Rhoda brushes a black curl over her shoulder. “I have come up with a ranking system for men who are in the running. But none of them are quite what I want.”
“You must tell me of this system you’ve devised!” I say, thoroughly intrigued by the conversation.
“I have come up with three different categories by which to judgemen. They are looks, manners, and personality. Each category is ranked from one to five, one being a low score, and five being a high score. Now take Lord Toles, for example. With his sculpted features and dark complexion, he is an easy five ranking in looks. He’s fairly polite and thoughtful, resulting in a three in manners. But personality? Oh, he’s as dry as a lake during a drought. Overall, he ranks only nine out of fifteen.”
“How fascinating! What would your ideal future husband rank overall?”
“At least a thirteen, don’t you think?”
I ponder it a moment. “Definitely. If we were only talking of bedding men, I would say you need to look only for fives in the good-looks category. If you were looking for a friend, all you would need is a five in the personality department. If you’re hoping for an escort to an event, then you would need only a five in manners, perhaps looks as well if you’re trying to leave a good impression. But for a love match? Definitely at least a thirteen.”
Rhoda nods. “I thought Lord Cosse would be the one after the last party. Did you know he and I danced three times together? Not in a row, of course. But three in total! He’s a four and a half in looks and a three and a half in personality. But manners? When I begged a break from the dancing because I was thirsty, he didn’t bother to offer to grab something from the refreshment table. He only went in search of a different dance partner. Can you believe that?”
“An outrage,” I say.
“My thoughts exactly. Lord Doukas has been after me for a while, but he’s only a two in looks. If we’re being kind,” she adds in a whisper. “The man is a five in both manners and personality. So it’s a real shame. I don’t like to think of myself as being shallow, but surely I should find a man I think is attractive if I’m to pursue him?”
“I agree.”
Rhoda sighs. “Sometimes, I don’t think there are enough men at court. And I’m convinced the perfect man doesn’t exist.”
Without prompting, Kallias’s visage rises to the front of my mind. The perfect symmetry of his face. The dark volume of his hair. His intelligent and bright green eyes. The view of his bare chest and bare… other things.
I think of our teasing and joking. Our discussions of bedding and reaching for the things we want. I think of the way he waited for me to arrive before starting on his dinner, how he waited up for me when I went out with Leandros.
Kallias has his flaws. Oh, so many flaws. I think of his temper. Of his selfishness to keep me to himself. Even though he doesn’t want all of me.
Mouth dry, I say, “I don’t think it’s necessarily about finding the perfect man but finding the perfect man for you. One person may rank a man far differently than another, even if they are both using your ranking system. But…”
“What?” Rhoda asks.
“The king is a fifteen. Perhaps not for everyone. But he is a fifteen for me.” And it’s the starkest truth.
Rhoda quirks her mouth to the side. “I assure you, Alessandra. It is not just you. The king is most assuredly a fifteen. Perhaps I should have rephrased. Noattainableman is a fifteen.”
How very right she is.
But I’m far from giving up just yet.
CHAPTER
17
The next day is more bleak than the ones we’ve been having of late, with gray clouds blocking the entirety of the sky. The air is full of moisture and constantly threatening rain, though no drops have surfaced just yet.
Despite the weather, I’m in a fine mood after the most recent letter from my father.
Alessandra, what did you do! Lord Eliades just withdrew his marriage proposal. He said rumors were abounding about you and the king. What happened?
You know we were depending on this after your failure to secure marriage with the king. Now I will have to start from the beginning to find someone who will have you. Why must you be so trying?
I suppose word of my naked swimming adventure with the king got back to Orrin. I’m so delighted to be rid of him.
I wrap a thick shawl about my shoulders and head outdoors, thinking today to be the perfect opportunity to sneak away for some air. No one else is likely to be outside. Not in this weather.
