Page 118 of Urgent Vows
Anger snaps in his dark eyes, his big body going rigid with lethal intent. "The one person in your house you knew had no power to change your fate."
"I couldn't tell Papà. He would have been too angry, and he wouldn't have listened anyway."
"She is right. Our father would not have listened." I put my hand on Severu's thigh, hoping it will help dispel his anger.
He is furious with my sister for putting me at risk.
"You did not try," Severu's voice is filled with judgment. "Instead, you played the part of the perfectly demur daughter, who would never think of disappointing her parent. You lied with your words. You lied with your actions."
Instead of being cowed by his condemnation, my sister glares at her don. "What else was I supposed to do? You don't know what it was like with Papà. Yes, I saw how he treatedsoru. Do you think I wanted him to hit me too?"
"You could have told me, or my mother."
"If you cancelled the engagement, Papà would have blamed me."
"You didn't think he was going to blame you for running away?" I ask with disbelief. At least if she'd told Severu,hewouldn't have a grievance against her.
"I knew he'd be mad at first, but he would have gotten over it. He always did."
Not before he found an outlet for that rage. It wasn't always me, but it was often enough. Carlotta had expected our father to vent his anger on me before she returned home.
It hurts, but I can't blame her. Anyone who isn't raised in a house with violence cannot understand. The fear is ever present, even for the child that is never beaten. Every day Carlotta had to wonder if that would be the day it changed for her.
Seeing what he did to me traumatized her too. She loves me and she loved our father. Her loyalties were constantly divided.
There is a tick in Severu's jaw.
I squeeze his thigh needing him to listen. "Growing up in that house damaged her too."
"You are too damn compassionate." The gentle brush of his hand on my cheek belies his angry words.
I shake my head. "I lived it. I know."
"I'm sorry. I'm sorry,soru." My sister starts to cry.
Part of me wants to go to her and comfort her, but the other part of me isn't there yet. Because although I understand, that doesn't make her betrayal hurt any less.
"I would like to add one condition to your plans for Carlotta."
My sister's head jerks up, hope lighting her gaze.
"What is it,mi dolce bellezza?"
Carlotta's eyes widen at the endearment.
Ignoring her surprise, I say, "I would like Carlotta to get therapy to help her process our childhood."
My sister gasps, her expression indicating that is not what she expected me to say. "I don't need to see a shrink."
"Do you want to go to culinary school?" Severu asks.
"You know I do."
"Then you will also see a therapist once a week and that therapist will be giving me reports, so you will do the work you have to. Despite your selfishness, your sister wants the best for you."
"I am selfish," Carlotta admits. "But I love yousoru. I always will."
"I love you too." It is easy to say, sitting beside Severu and knowing I am safe from the abuse of my past. "Your don is giving you a chance at the life you said you wanted. It will mean you learning to take responsibility and work for your dreams, but I believe you can do it."
