Page 29 of Shattered Saint
“Do you think about our last conversation?”
His response caught me off guard. “Um… no.” It was a lie, but he didn’t have to know that.
He shrugged and crossed his arms once more. His body language screamed that he wasn’t sure he wanted to talk about this topic, but his eyes shined with all the confidence anyone could muster. “I think about it often, along with what happened the night before.”
I could feel something within me snap. I’d wanted to go into this with a level head, but his words made me reach my breaking point. My hands curled into fists, and it took me counting to five before I felt as if I had enough of a handle on my emotions that I could guarantee I wasn’t going to hit him.
“Listen, I don’t know what game you’re playing, but you’re not about to drag me down into your shit. You and I both said some things that day, and that was the end of it. Just because you’re my brother’s best friend, doesn’t mean that I have to entertain any of this. Now what is it that you want?”
Easton looked down at the ground and I could see a slight smile forming on his face. It only infuriated me even more.
“I didn’t expect such a response from you, especially since it’s been years. I’m impressed with how you’re handling yourself.”
My mouth dropped open slightly, and then I threw my arms up in anger. “You know what? I don’t care anymore about what you want with me. But what you’re going to do, is stop harassing me, stay the hell away from me, and forget we ever spoke… or fucked.”
I didn’t wait to hear what his response was. I marched over to the classroom door and swung it open. Without a backward glance, I walked out of the room, daring him to follow me as I left.
I didn’t stop until I made it outside to a small park that was located on campus. I looked around to double check that he hadn’t followed me. When I realized he hadn’t, I finally was able to calm my nerves enough to be able to think.
Did I think this was over?
Not by a long shot.
Deep down, I knew that this was only the beginning of whatever the hell he was doing. Because ever since we first met, things with him and me were never that simple.
* * *
I wishedI could make it stop.
The panic. The busyness that surrounded me.
All of it. I just wanted to make it all stop.
It was later that night, after I ran into Easton in my psychology class, and I couldn’t get the interaction out of my head. I took a swig from the glass of wine I had in front of me and stared off into the nothingness that was my apartment. Sure, I had all I needed here and could do anything I wanted, but staring into the abyss seemed much more attractive to me.
On the surface, I had it all. I was the mayor's daughter who never wanted for anything monetarily. My brother, best friend, and my sorority sisters loved me. My mother cared for me at times. I would love to say that my father did too, but that was a story for a different day.
I took another big gulp of the wine in front of me. It was my third glass of the night. While I knew I should stop, I didn't want to. The alcohol was helping to numb the pain I felt, and I was alright with that for now.
Tomorrow, I would deal with the consequences. After all, this was reason for a celebration, even though it looked as if right now I was doing anything but.
I'd kept my cool today, and I was proud. I didn't have a sip of alcohol throughout my whole time in the city, including at a gala I was forced to attend tonight. The urge to wash away my feelings about having to be somewhere I didn't want to be was strong, but I resisted.
But that ended as soon as I got back to my apartment. Once I was in the comfort of my own space, I took the opportunity to unwind, although by the looks of it, I probably should have stopped drinking a while ago.
I stared at the wineglass in front of me, debating with myself whether it made sense to drain the rest of the wine.
Before I could make a decision, there was a knock on my front door.
I felt my head swim, I contemplated opening the door. Who was that? Could I keep myself together enough to open the door?
I was going to ignore the person at the door because it seemed like a bad idea to answer, but then they knocked again.
With a deep sigh, I stood up and made my way to the door. When I opened it, I was met with an unexpected surprise. On the other side stood a woman from the front desk of my apartment building, holding a vase of beautiful white roses and blue hydrangeas.
"Good evening," she said with a smile. "These were delivered for you." She gestured to the vase in her hands, filled with delicate flowers.
This small gesture of kindness was sweet, but I didn't know who sent them. After thanking her, I grabbed the vase, and she closed the door once she left. It probably wasn't best for me to be attempting to carry this given how much I'd been drinking, but I made it to the kitchen counter unscathed.
