Page 62 of Offensive Edge
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By the time they headed upstairs after lunch, Theo was feeling a lot more sober. Having some food in his stomach, and some quiet of the three of them being alone in their house instead of hosting a party, or being at the largest parade Theo had ever been a part of helped, too. He thought he might have drunk all he needed to in order to celebrate. It was time to dry out. At least until their Cup days.
Rowan was still dealing with his ankle issues, which he would continue to have to deal with for at least a handful of weeks, if not longer, so Theo was careful as he helped Rowan strip down, then stripped himself. He got a soft smile from Rowan as he reeled him in, bare skin to bare skin, Rowan’s hands roaming over his chest. Theo wasn’t one for bulking up vanity muscles if they weren’t going to help with hockey, but he knew that he would be adding some additional chest exercises to his weight routine that summer.
Between the two of them, Theo was the one with the more robust sexual history, and while he and Rowan were getting more comfortable with each other, Rowan was just not the kind of person who got off on weird, risky stuff. He was the kind of person who needed to feel safe and alone, and Theo was more than happy to provide that for him. And in the future, he hoped Rowan trusted him enough to tell him if he wanted to experiment with anything else.
Rowan surprised Theo by pushing him onto his back, and climbing onto his lap as soon as they got in bed.
“If I hadn’t signed with the Serpents this year,” Rowan said, “and you still won the Cup—”
“You know we wouldn’t have without you.”
Rowan rolled his eyes. Sometimes it was hard to pick apart the tangle of false modesty, shyness, and the genuine sense that he wasn’t the most special player this game has maybe ever seen, but Theo was pretty sure the last option weighed most heavily on that eye roll.
“If I had signed somewhere else, it would have made me happier to watch you lift the Stanley Cup on TV than it would have to lift it myself, without you.”
“Ro,” Theo said, pushing himself up to sitting, Rowan in his lap. He wrapped his arms around Rowan’s waist and held on to him as he wiggled his legs free and wrapped them around Theo’s back. They were tangled like two pretzels. Like a pile of necklaces at the bottom of his mom’s jewelry box. It might have been messy getting where they were, but they were stuck like that forever.
“I’m not kidding,” Rowan insisted.
“I know. I don’t think you are. Exaggerating, maybe…”
“Teddy, c’mon. I’m trying to say something here.”
In the last handful of months, Rowan had really shown up for him. He’d tried to be as direct in his communication as possible. He’d showed Theo that things are different now that they’re adults. And he’d shown Theo over and over the regret he carried over the way their respective professional careers started, and their relationship ended.
In turn, deciding to bury the hatchet and look his own shitty teenage behavior in the face made him feel lighter than he had in a long time. Being with Rowan made him feel like he was a cracked teapot that was getting glued back together.
“I would have been pretty heartbroken to watch you and Felix win the Cup together,” Theo admitted, in the name of transparency. Rowan laughed.
“I know. I don’t blame you.”
“Not that you didn’t deserve it. I watched so many Victory games over the last eight years, and you and Felix really put on a clinic every night.” Theo had a measure of jealousy around Felix still. Felix got to be Rowan’s best friend for some important years Theo missed out on. But the thing that he and Felix undeniably had in common was that no matter how good at hockey either of them were, they would never be the best player when playing on the same team as Rowan.
“You watched my games?”
“You didn’t know that?”
“I thought you were angry with me.”
“I was. But ever since I met you, there has been a large chunk of my brain reserved forThinking About Rowan Foley, and it has never gone away.”
Rowan’s arms were tight around Theo’s shoulders. They had both shaved their playoff beards, and while Theo’s was already on its way back, the unstoppable force of his life and reason he usually didn’t shave in general, Rowan’s face was still bare and smooth. It suited him much better than the scraggly beard he’d been rocking for weeks.
“I love you,” he told Theo, his words holding the cumulative weight of their journey. It was a different love than it had been those many years ago. It was stronger now, settled. It was built on honesty, and trust, and forgiveness.
“I love you, babe. Are you going to let me fuck you while Vic is home?”
Rowan laughed like it wasn’t something he had a little hang-up about. If he didn’t feel comfortable with it, Theo was happy to just nap next to him. But he had a little energy left, and he wanted to use it up by making Rowan come.
“Yes,” he said, wiggling a little in Theo’s lap.
“Does the presence of you in my lap mean you want to ride me?” They hadn’t done that yet, and he couldn’t pretend his dick wasn’t interested in the idea.
“Umm…”
“Umm yes or umm no? If not, it’s no big deal.”
