Page 9 of Hateful
I’m definitely more woman shaped than I was last semester. I think longingly of all the desserts I’m going to have to miss out on. And here I was thinking I’d gotten past this already.
Seems I was wrong.
Seems it’s only just begun.
* * *
We still havethe same classes as last semester, so I keep walking with Rafael on the way to our shared morning class. It’s the first full day of back, and I’m nervous. Much more nervous that I expected to be.Thisis supposed to be the normal now.Thisis supposed to be easy. Natural.
I guess a few weeks away did more to me than just pad out my deceptively female figure.
I try to keep Caleb’s words in my head.Avoid, avoid, avoid,I think as Rafael and I enter our classroom and pass by Jasper’s desk.
Jasper.
I half expect him to do another unexpected switch since I saw him last, to suddenly go back to his old aggressive, confrontational self … but once again, I’m wrong.
As soon as I walk into the room, Jasper averts his eyes, his body shifting uncomfortably in his seat. He sits between two empty desks, so I suppose Beck and Heath aren’t here yet.
My stomach sinks as I find my own seat. What will things be like with them?
Surely they haven’t grown as timid as Jasper.
I tap my fingers nervously as I watch the door. A steady stream of fellow students trickle in, and I find myself jumping as I see familiar things like a shock of blonde hair the same as Beck’s, or a certain color I know Heath wears often. My tapping increases in speed until Rafael reaches over and pushes his palm against my knuckles, flattening my hand against the desk. I glance at him, but he’s not even looking at me, just scribbling something on his notebook.
“If you keep making that noise,” he says, still not looking up at me, “I’m going to break your fingers.”
I scowl and jerk my hand from underneath his, but I know better than to keep provoking him. I shove my hands into my armpits and clamp my elbows down to my sides.
And then, suddenly, there they are. Beck enters first, his eyes wide and searching, his fingers curling and uncurling at his sides as though hoping for a fight to start so he can participate. Tall, broad, blonde, blue-eyed, and with cheekbones sharp enough to slice me in half, his gaze snaps to Jasper before he drifts over to take a seat on his left.
Then comes Heath. His hair is a little longer than last semester; it curls over his ears just a little. A relaxed grin stretches across his face as he saunters in, hands in his pant pockets.
Heath sits, and The Brotherhood—TheWickedBrotherhood—of Bleakwood is all in one room once again.
I watch them for a moment, looking for any sign that something has changed in the other two over break. But the more I look, the more normal Heath and Beck seem. Beside them, however, Jasper looks positively stiff, like a wax version of himself.
Has he told them anything about what happened that night? Do they know … about me? Not one of them looks my way, and I’m mostly thankful—but part of me fumes a little. What, after all the shit they put me through last semester, they think they can justignoreme now?
“All right, class,” sighs the professor, and I tear my gaze away from them, grabbing my pencil to take notes. I need to get my head on straight.
But throughout class, I find myself sneaking glances in their direction.
It’s good that they’re ignoring me. I need to avoid them, anyway.
I just didn’t expect them to be the ones doing the avoiding.
Chapter Five
“We should head to the assembly,”Rafael says nonchalantly as he tosses me a banana. I stare longingly at the little cupcake on his plate as he sits across from me. I’ve never wanted a cupcake so much in my life, but I can practicallyfeelmy hips starting to sway beneath where I’m seated in the dining hall.
As if to mock me further, my stomach lets out an enormous rumble. I’m not even hungry. I filled up on greens and chicken since I’m not exactly trying tostarvemyself, even if my stomach would like me to think that I’m going to die if I don’t justeat the damn cupcake.
Rafael is staring at me when I finally look away from the dessert and up at him.
“Is it important, like, atall? Can’t I just skip it?”
Rafael shrugs. “It’s about time to do the annual competition against the girls’ school.”
