Page 167 of Seasons of Love
I lean on him so much that I’m practically in his lap and rest my head against his.
“I think I’ve been in survival mode for so long that I don’t know how else to be.”
He kisses my lips gently. “You have Florrie, me, my family. We’re all here for you. The question is, can you let go of the past so you can heal and move on?”
“You think I should fight for the playground?”
“No. I think you should do whatever feels right for you. You don’t need to be involved with anything unless it serves you.”
I try to stand, and this time, Ellis doesn’t stop me.
He follows me out of the room.
Dave is in the kitchen doing the pans when we walk in. He doesn’t say anything but gives me an encouraging smile as I head toward the double doors.
I take a deep breath and go through.
Most people are still in the hall, so I take the bell and stand on the same chair Ellis did.
“Can I have your attention, please? Most of you know me, and most of you think you know the truth about what happened with my family. I don’t owe anyone my story, but all I ask is that you look at what’s in front of you. I’ve lost my whole family apart from the one gift my brother left me. You see me at the grocery store. You see me raising a child I love more than anyone can imagine. I was one of you when I was six and barely understood what was happening, and I’m still one of you now. I will continue to volunteer here like I’ve done since the first day. I hope, whatever your opinion of me is, that you either speak to me, get to know me, or move on. Life is already hard enough in this neighborhood for us to turn on each other.”
I step down from the chair and stand behind the soup I was supposed to serve earlier.
My hands are shaking from adrenaline, and I half expect everyone to boo me out of the hall.
Instead, something else happens. One by one, everyone stands and starts lining up in front of my post.
“Can I have a small portion, please?” someone asks.
I take a bowl from the stack and serve her the soup. Within minutes, the soup is gone.
“As far as olive branches go, that was kind of awesome,” Anne says.
“Thank you.”
I look at Ellis, and his proud smile warms me and gives me strength. He would have supported me if I hadn’t done this, I know that. But I did it for Sara and for me. We both have a place in the community and deserve to be treated kindly.
At the end of the evening, Ellis walks me home.
Sara is asleep and Florrie is reading her book when we come in.
“Oh, my lovely boy,” she says, almost in tears. “I’m so proud of you.”
“That knitting club gossip mill sure does run overtime,” Ellis says.
Florrie waves him off and goes to her place.
Ellis follows me to the nursery when I go to check in on Sara.
“She’s so precious,” he says.
“She’s my whole heart.”
Sara never stirs as we talk. Ellis gives me a good-night kiss and leaves.
It takes a couple of seconds for my brain to catch up. I run outside.
“Ellis.”
