Page 93 of Malice and Surrender
“Hmm, did I, though? I said I’d make it worth your while, but that is completely different. It’s your fault you didn’t get clarification before we left.” I smiled at her and loved that she pressed her lips together in a hard line as she shot daggers at me with her pretty blue eyes.
That’s it, Peaches. Let the tiger out to play.
“Besides, what good does it do us if we sugar-coat shit? All it ever does is create half-truths, hurt feelings, or misunderstandings, and honestly, I don’t have time for that shit. If I like you, I like you. If I don’t, you fucking know it. So, I will ask you one more time. Do you love Avro?”
Raine licked her lips, and I was so fucking tempted to grab her face and scare the shit out of her as I kissed her while driving, but the highway was too busy to do that tonight. Scaring the shit out of her was one thing. Driving head-on into another car was not on my bucket list.
Raine sighed and leaned her elbow on the door as she rubbed at her forehead. “This is all new.”
“But you’ve known him for four years. Are you saying you have no idea how you feel after all that time? I find that hard to believe. And if you’re just leading him on, I will leave your ass right here on the side of the road,” I growled.
Raine turned in her seat and hit me with a glare that went straight to my cock and had it swelling. The way her brows drew together and those bright blue eyes sparkled with anger…Even the way she bit her bottom lip like she was trying to bite it off rather than say what she really wanted. Fuck, that look was hot.
“You can’t force me to say something I don’t fully understand. Feelings don’t exactly work that way, Jace,” she said, her voice venomous as she said my name, and my cock twitched a little more. If she kept looking at me like that, I was going to pull over right here on the highway. It would make a great headline for the tabloids when the state police came knocking on the rocking car window.
“Tell me what you do feel. Spit it out, Peaches. Let go of all the doubt and wonder and worry and what ifs and just speak,” I said, my voice holding as much heat as her gaze.
“Fuck, you’re irritating,” she groaned. I smirked. “I think so, but I’m not sure, and before you spout off again, I’ll tell you why. I’ve spent our entire time together as friends. Did I want him? Sure, but I wasn’t stupid enough to pine over something I thought would never happen. I shut down any inappropriate feelings before they got a chance to get rolling.”
She held out her hands toward me. “You’re asking me to describe how I feel when I’ve barely got my head wrapped around the ludicrous idea he even wants me. Then with the shit that happened with my ex-friend, I’m just not in the right head space to say yes, I love him, or no, I’m not as a definitive answer.”
She moved her hands in two circles in front of her chest. “There is so much going on right now that I don’t know which end is up, but if you are asking if I have strong feelings, then yes. He makes me smile and feel safe. He makes me feel things that I thought were only in fairy tales. So if you want to kick me out on the side of the road for that, go for it.”
“Fine. Do you think you could?”
She nodded, but the softness in her eyes and the way her shoulders relaxed said she was all up in her feels, even if she didn’t recognize it.
“Yeah, I do.” She cocked her head. “Why aren’t you asking about yourself?”
I tapped my finger on the top of the steering wheel and pulled out to pass a long line of cars that decided tonight was Sunday drive time. “Because I don’t care if you love me or not.” I gave her the full weight of my stare. “At least not yet.”
“If you care so much about what Avro wants, why were you so upset when he wanted to change the arrangement you two have?” she asked.
“Had.”
“What?”
“Had, as in past tense. Did you not pay attention in English class?” I snipped and bit the inside of my cheek to keep from laughing as she went as red as any cherry I’d ever seen. “Don’t worry about answering. I don’t really care. I grudgingly already agreed to his new idea, or I’m going to try for as long as I can.” I shrugged, loving this game of poking at her way more than I should.
I still wasn’t sure I could hold off having sex with anyone other than my hand for that long, but for Avro, I’d fucking give it my all. Not damaging our relationship was the most important thing to me. Not even my music career meant as much.
“So what does that mean? You just going to start cheating on him when you decide you’ve had enough?” Raine fumed, and my mouth curled up in a smile. Good, she was protective already, and that boded well for us.
“Do I strike you as an asshole?”
She turned her head like a bird as she stared at me with a ‘are you fucking stupid’ look on her face. “Is this a trick question?”
“Fine, I’m an asshole. Do I strike you as a cheating asshole?” I asked.
“How am I supposed to know that? We’ve spent less than a week together. I had a goldfish I knew better than you,” she said.
I barked out a laugh and then smiled wide. “I like this side of you, Peaches. You have a fire that you’ve been keeping buried for far too long.”
“Yeah, well, you seem to bring out the colorful side of me,” Raine mumbled.
“To answer your question, no, I’m not a cheater. Despite whatever the tabloids, social media, or entertainment shows say, I don’t do anything that is not a media stunt or is discussed and approved with Avro. I knew about you for a long time.”
“You did?”
