Page 55 of Malice and Surrender
Tears spilled over and trailed down my cheeks. Nothing moved him. Nothing lessened his strong grip or wavered that unnerving stare. I tried to claw at his face, aiming for his eyes, but he kept himself just out of my reach.
His lip pulled up at the corner in a smirk that was once so sexy but now only sent cold dread racing along my spine.
“You having fun, Tink?”
He yanked me towards him and spun my body around. I cried out as I was smashed into the door, my cheek and already sore ribs taking most of the blow. Pinning me against the wood like an insect on a board, Kai got close to my ear, and all I felt was the heat radiating off his body.
I closed my eyes, and my body shook uncontrollably in his hold. Kai ran his nose up the side of my neck.
“You smell so good, Tink. You smell exactly how I imagined you would.”
“Get off of me, you asshole,” I growled and kicked backward, trying to find any soft spot or even a knee, but he must have been expecting that, and I didn’t hit anything.
“Keep it up, Tink. I like hearing your screams.”
“Oh, I know you do.” Gathering all my strength, I pushed with all my might against the door and swung backward as hard as I could with my elbow.
“Fucking bitch,” Kai yelled as my elbow made contact. I felt his grip loosen on my sweatshirt and spun around. I broke his hold and bolted for the front door.
The house that had always seemed so small now felt like a marathon run to the door. My legs pumped hard, my lungs burned, and my head felt light with my erratic breaths. I knew I might pass out with this much adrenaline pumping, but I couldn’t stop it, no more than I could stop the hand from grabbing hold of the hood on my sweatshirt. The cool touch of the door handle grazed the tips of my fingers, and just like that, I was wrenched off my feet and crashed to the floor.
Everything went numb. The air was forced out of my lungs, my fingers and toes tingled, while my head spun.
I cried out but could only wheeze as a heavy weight pressed into the middle of my chest. The lightning flashed, and the thunder rumbled like the sky was as angry as the man that held me. Kai’s knee was on my chest, but the hand wrapped around my throat, and the fingers that steadily pressed in until I couldn’t breathe told me that I was going to die.
I grabbed at Kai’s arm, begging with my eyes to let go. I locked eyes with him, and there wasn’t anything left of the boy I remembered. The boy I’d fallen in love with, the boy who broke my heart, stole my virginity, and now was going to take my life.
How I wished I’d just gone to the airport.
He raised his fist, and I glanced at those large knuckles and then back up into his eyes.
“P…l…ease,” I pushed past my constricted windpipe. “Kai…”
His arm shook as the fist hovered, but it didn’t matter now. Black dots exploded behind my eyes, and I tried but couldn’t get a breath into my burning lungs. Hot tears slid down my cheeks and were the last thing I felt before the world went dark.
Kaivan
“Fuck,” I roared and released Raine’s neck.
I dropped to my ass beside her limp body and watched as her head lolled to the side. She looked like she was peacefully sleeping, eyes closed, and her long lashes wet from tears.
The rage still flowed like lava through my veins, and yet I…I couldn’t kill her. I could’ve easily crushed her windpipe and ended it. So many nights, I’d lain awake and stared at my small cell, picturing exactly how I wanted her to die after she finally paid for what she did to me. The lies she spread put me in the one place I promised I would never end up.
Ultimately, I didn’t care as long as she was no longer breathing. Walking through her house, I’d envisioned all the possibilities, but now that the moment was here, I couldn’t fucking do it.
How many people had I killed without a second thought, but the one who’d caused me more pain than anyone else…she broke me. My mind and body revolted when my hand closed around her throat. I stared into her big blue eyes that looked the same except filled with terror. My hand wouldn’t listen, and my mind screamed that I didn’t want to do this.
Those blue eyes haunted my mind like a viperous spirit ready to strike, and tonight they had. They’d snatched my retribution. I should be ripping them out of her head, not admiring how beautiful they still are.
“Fuck my life!”
She made me no better than my old man, and now, after everything I’d done…I was worse.
“Fuck you, Raine! Fuck you!”
Memories of her smiling and laughing as she wore her little pink outfits raced through my mind. The feel of her touch lingered as she hugged me and told me she would miss me when I left for college. Her lips on mine as I kissed her, and for those few brief seconds, my life had been perfect.
Why? I needed to know why.
