Page 40 of The Spare
I also couldn’t seem to stop myself from gently nudging the boundaries of what was appropriate between friends. I told myself that the line would be wherever she pushed back. We hadn’t gotten there yet.
I shrugged. “I guess it is Christmas.”
“If you take a day off, how will we mere mortals be reminded of your superiority?” she mused.
“I can arrange for reminders.”
Her eyes sparkled when she laughed. The sound made the possible loss of a board vote seem like a minor inconvenience rather than the giant roadblock it would be.
“So…you’re just going to live your life alone then?” she asked, looking down at her lap. Her lashes swept up, and she looked at my puzzled expression. Where the fuck did that come from? “Earlier, you said you weren’t in any serious relationships because you were working. You’re always going to be working.”
“Yeah…”
“Then, by your logic, you’ll always be alone.”
I shrugged. Why did any of that matter? “Seems unavoidable.”
“You couldchooseto make time.”
“Why would I do that?” The future wasn’t something I planned—not my personal one, anyway. Why plan for something that could be ripped away at any moment? I could control Sutton Industries; that was the future I planned.
“Won’t you feel lonely?”Genuine concern papered her face.
“I’m fine.”
“Fine isn’t really a feeling, though.”
“Thisfeelsa little like an interrogation.”
“Oh good.” She grinned. “I was scared I was being too subtle.”
“I thought you weren’t a litigator.”
“Doesn’t mean I’m not great at it.”She leaned back into the couch with an arrogant smile. It was fucking adorable.
I needed to change the subject. She threw me off balance. I would slip up and say something I shouldn’t.
“Once you become partner, what’s next?” I asked.
She crossed her arms. “I wasn’t finished with my questions.”
“I’m changing the terms, somethingI’mgreat at.”
“Managing partner,” she answered in a huff, defeated.
“That’s what you want?” Sometimes I wondered how much of her drive was fueled by expectations or the rebuking of those expectations. She was defiance personified.
“At the firm, I can be first. I can be heard. I have a real shot at it,” Sloan continued. She looked down, and some of her thick black locks fell forward. “I know it's a childish reason.”
“It's not childish.” Without thinking, I tucked some of the hair behind her ear. It felt good. Intimate. Her luminous brown eyes met mine, and something passed between us. Like a circuit finally clicked into place. For a moment, we were frozen.
She blinked and jolted back slightly, as if waking from a dream, and crimson ran along her cheek. I took note of the boundary I clearly crossed.
I had to get better at adapting.
I couldn’t be away from her, that much was clear. I’d have to find the edges of what was appropriate and stay within bounds. I could reel it in and stop myself from being lulled into a fantasy.
I could ignore the adorable way she filled the silence with a sly joke. Disregard that her laugh lifted my mood. I could pretend that I didn’t feel the way I did. I’d been doing it for years, and practice did make perfect.
