Page 71 of Wild Mistake
The next week passes quickly.I spend a few hours with Pops in the mornings, help Will at the hardware store, and stop by the diner to flirt with Sarah during her shifts. Sometimes she comes over after work for hot soaks in the bath and the best foot massages in the world. Her words, not mine. We make love. We fuck. We kiss like two teenagers who can’t get enough.
Which is how she makes me feel. I can’t imagine ever getting my fill when it comes to Sarah.
We missed out on so many moments together. So much time. But I’m determined to make up for it all.
The hardest part is staying in the moment, especially when everyone in town asks me what my plans are. I want my future to include Sarah, but beyond that I’m still figuring it out. For now, I stay busy, filling my time with the people I care about most.
I’m sweeping the floor of the hardware store on Thursday afternoon when I glance at my watch. Shit. I push the broom to where my cousin sits behind the counter. “You mind if I dip out of here?” I ask as he looks up from the order form he’s filling out. “I want to swing by and see Sarah before it gets too late.”
“As I keep reminding you, you don’t work here.”
“Yet, you aren’t turning down the free labor.”
“I’m not stupid.” He laughs. “But I’m starting to worry you might be.”
“I like helping out.” I shrug. “Besides, I owe you. I should’ve been around more over the years and I wasn’t. This is me making up for lost time.”
“As much as I truly enjoy your company, and the use of your muscles, that’s not how it works, you know.”
“Yeah,” I say, but I disagree. I missed a lot over the years. I wasn’t here when Mom got sick. I wasn’t here when my brother’s marriage fell apart. Hell, I even missed Will and Samuel’s wedding. All because I couldn’t bring myself to come back to this place after Sarah moved on without me.
I always justified my decision because my job in the Army was important. Hell, not everyone qualifies for Ranger training, let alone makes it through. But I’m beginning to question if the sacrifice was worth it. There were too many times I should have been here for the people I love most, and I wasn’t. I have so much to make up for.
“It’s not my place and you didn’t ask, but you don’t owe me or anyone else for the time you spent away. This isn’t a mission. This is your life.”
“Right.”Is that what everyone thinks?I don’t like being psychoanalyzed by my own cousin. I shove the broom back in its place and grab my coat.
“Shit.” Will sets down his pen and meets my gaze. “I overstepped, didn’t I?”
“No. You’re entitled to your opinion, and I respect what you have to say. Always have.” Only, I can’t deny his words cause me to pause. They hold truth, and some of it isn’t pretty.
“I’m sorry. Don’t listen to me. What do I know?”
“Probably more than most.” I force a grin and change the subject. “I’ve seen you talking with customers. Does everyone give you their life story when they’re placing an order for lumber?”
“I must have a trustworthy face.”
“Yeah. That must be it.” I wipe the sweat from my forehead and glance around the storeroom. “I’ve only been here a week, but I don’t think the place has ever looked so good.”
Will snorts. “That sounds like something Samuel would say.”
“When does he get back?”
“Oh.” Will glances away, picking up the stack of orders and shuffling through the papers. “He extended his trip another week.”
“We should all go out when he’s back.”
“Yeah.” Will doesn’t quite meet my eyes.
Shit.Are Will and Samuel having problems? It’s none of my business, but maybe he needs someone to talk to. “Everything okay with you two?”
“Eh.” He makes a non-committal sound.
“If you want to talk about it, or anything, I’m here.”
“It’s nothing.” He shakes his head, but I don’t believe him. “I’ve just been feeling a little off, and my mind goes places. I’ll feel better when he’s back.”
“Sure.” I understand that. Though I also want to tell him not to ignore his gut. How many times did that little voice inside my head save me? “Well, if you change your mind, you know where to find me. I’m happy to listen. I’ll even call you out on your bullshit.”
