Page 56 of Caught in Us
26
Alicia
“More shots for the single ladies!”one of Jill’s coworkers screams above the current rendition of “Total Eclipse of the Heart” blasting from the speakers.
Our server holds out the tray of amber-orange cocktails, and most of the women from our group huddle around to take their glass.
“Drink up, bitches!” someone cheers, holding hers high before throwing it back.
I pass, of course, which earns me a few curious stares, but Jill’s friends are too polite to harass me about it. Or maybe they’re mature enough not to care. Either way, I’m grateful. I have no interest in sharing my life story. In my limited sober night-life experience, publicly claiming I’m a recovering alcoholic while in a bar tends to make people uncomfortable. Or they ask insanely personal questions. I’d like to avoid both.
Not that I frequent bars much these days.
As much as this isn’t my scene, I am happy to be here celebrating with Jill and Callie.And Chase’s girlfriend. Okay, so I’m not thrilled about that. A few people left after dinner and selfishly I hoped she’d be one of them. Alas, the universe is not that kind. She’s here, hanging out and acting like an all-around decent human. Because she is. Which is equally annoying. It would be easier to hate her if she was a bitch.
Fuck. In this scenario, I’m afraid I’m the villain. I abandoned Chase and my best friends. I had Chase’s baby and didn’t tell him until this week. She’s going to hate me once she finds out, and she’ll have every right.
“You okay?” Callie says, leaning forward so I can hear her over the crowd.
It’s a loaded question.
“I’m good.” I force a smile.
“If this bothers you and you need to bail early, Jill will totally understand.”
I wave off her concern. “No, it’s fine. I’m fine.”
“When you say you’re fine twice in the sentence, it usually means the opposite.” Callie wiggles her finger at me.
Nervous laughter bursts from my belly. “I am as fine as anyone can be in a karaoke bar.”And hanging with her baby daddy’s new girlfriend.
Callie scoots closer and bumps her hip against mine. “Don’t think I haven’t noticed you’ve been steering clear of that microphone.”
“I am not much of a singer. You should know that.”
“Oh, no.” Callie shakes her head. “You used to be the queen of karaoke. You’ve only been gone a few years. That kind of talent doesn’t fade way. Don’t think I forgot.”
Maybe after a little liquid courage.
“I’m not sure my voice works the same when I’m not drunk,” I joke.
“Come on.” Callie takes my hand in hers and gives it a squeeze. “For old times’ sake, sing a duet with me?”
Before I can refuse, Jill slides between us. “What are you two talking about and why do I feel left out?”
“We were just deciding what we should sing together,” Callie interjects.
I shake my head and hold out my hands. “Oh, no. I did not agree to that.”
Jill’s face lights up. “Fuck, yeah! We have to do a song! The three of us!”
“You wouldn’t deny a bride at her bachelorette party, would you?” Callie grins in triumph.
Fuck. There is no way I’m getting out of this. Not without looking like a total dick. “Ugh. Fine but I get to pick the song.”
“Let’s do this!” Jill threads her arm through mine and marches us toward the stage.
My stomach tumbles with nerves. I really don’t have the best voice. Not that anyone in here cares. Still, I feel out of my element. My confidence is shaken after this week, and I’m having a hard time finding exactly where I fit in. With Jill and Callie. With Chase. With my family too.
