Page 42 of Caught in Us
“Mama! Go!” This time his scream is angry and his foot stomps when she doesn’t move to his demands.
She scoops him up and meets my gaze over his head. “I think we better wrap this up before he has a total meltdown.”
“Mama! Go!” He waves the wooden truck as if he’d like to chuck it over the edge.
“It might be too late for that.” She winces, catching his fist and the toy in her hand to draw his gaze to hers. “Matthew. This is the last one. One more time. Then we have to go.”
His face scrunches up, his features twisting with displeasure. “No. No go!”
“Hey, bud. How about we take a ride to go see more toys? You wanna take a ride?”
“Mo’ toys?” He blinks, the tension leaving his body at the idea. “Mo’ toys now?”
I have to bite back my laughter. The way he says things is too cute. “Yeah!” I nod, holding my hands out. “Let’s go find more toys and take a ride!”
He doesn’t even glance at Alicia, the truck she confiscated already forgotten as he scrambles down out of her arms and practically leaps into mine. There’s something about it. The total trust. The adoration in his wide eyes. His innocence. I’ve only known him a short time, but already this boy has my heart.
“Come on.” I lift him over my head and onto my shoulders. “Let’s go find more toys.”
“You better not be making empty promises,” Alicia teases, though there’s a bite to her words. She climbs down from the play structure, taking my hand a short moment for balance. Awareness of her skin on mine zings through my body.
I’ve always found her attractive, but after today, watching her care for our son, witnessing how patient and joyful she is with him—it stirs memories from the summer we shared. It’s a magnetism simmering just below the surface that we’re both stepping around. If I wasn’t with Julia, I probably would act on it, which only adds to the confusion between us. What are we to each other? Over time will this desire fade, or will it only grow stronger?
I think I know the answer, and frankly it doesn’t scare me as much as it should.
As we walk through the museum, I focus on clearing ceiling heights with Matthew on my shoulders. I hold on to him tightly, but as soon as he notices us walking toward the exit, he shares his thoughts on our direction.
“No go. No. Mo’ toys!”
Alicia sighs. “We’ll be lucky if we make it out of here without a full-blown tantrum.”
“He’s pretty easygoing most of the time, though?” I ask, making the assumption on his personality today. He’s busy. Curious. The kid has buckets of energy. But he’s not rude or territorial like some of the other kids we came across.
“Oh, yeah.” She nods. “But going on no nap and lots of play, it’s a matter of when, not if.”
“Then I guess I’ll have to keep my word.” I stop outside the gift shop doors, and slide Matthew off my shoulders. “Let’s go find a toy, okay?” I say before setting him on his feet. He takes off running to the first display—a table of trains.
“You’re going to spoil him, aren’t you?” she asks, but she doesn’t seem terribly upset. If anything, more amused.
“I have a few years to make up for.” The second the words leave my lips, I regret them.
Alicia’s smile falters and she turns away, tucking her chin so I can’t see her face.
“Alicia.” I want to explain. I didn’t mean to make her feel bad, not after this perfect day. But I can’t because Matthew races away from the trains, over to a wall of stuffed animals, and begins pulling them down like it’s an Olympic sport.
“I’ll meet you outside,” she says without a backward glance, then pushes out of the store.
“Hey, buddy.” I make my way to Matthew, scoop him up, and balance him on my hip as I return the toys to their spot on the shelf. “How about we find one toy to take home? Only one. That sound good?”
“Good.” He nods. “Yes.”
I have no idea whether he understands, but his quick agreement brings a smile to my lips. We walk through the aisles and he entertains me by allowing me to hold him as we discuss a few options. Of course, the conversation is one-sided. Or rather, it is until we find our winner.
“Truck! Me!” he shouts, pointing at the mini monster truck. It’s lifted, with a tailgate that opens and shuts. I can already picture him playing with it in the dirt.
“You want this?” I pick it up and hand it to him.
His smile is wide and his little fingers curl around the toy as he hugs it to his chest.
