Page 84 of All of Him
“Amanda Bette”—he kissed me—“I believe we might just be.”
46
Noah
MY EYES SLID OPENin the morning light, the sun out in Dublin—a rare occurrence. Amanda stirred next to me, in my arms and completely nude. I held her tightly against my body, not ready to break the touch. Her breaths were even, and I ran my hand down her arm, then under the covers and over her bare thigh.
“Morning,” she said groggily, flipping to her back and connecting her eyes with mine.
We smiled at each other, and I let my hand wander higher.
“Very good morning,” she corrected herself.
I chuckled and pulled her leg so that it draped over mine and she rolled toward me, then pressed my hips gently into her.
“You okay?” I asked, pushing her hair behind her ear.
“Are you?” she countered. “That was a lot of touching last night.”
“Amanda,” I said seriously.
She leaned in and kissed me softly, then pulled back, smiling.
“I’ve wanted that for a long time,” she admitted. “You?”
I nodded and pulled her on top of me, my hands on either side of her waist.
“Wanna know a secret?”
“What’s that?” I asked, barely able to control my thoughts. I knew she felt how helpless I was by her smirk and the way she adjusted herself slightly against me.
“I’ve never slept over with someone.”
“So, you’ve never had morning sex?” I provoked.
Amanda shook her head, smirking.
“I should say something before we…resume last night,” she started, leaning down and kissing me quickly.
“And what’s that?”
She paused, seemingly searching for the words, then slid to my side, though not letting go. “Last night was the most intimate moment I’ve ever had. You made it feel like my first time. You’re very thoughtful.”
My heart melted at her words, though I didn’t know what to say. I’d never been complimented on my skills in bed before, not in any way. But, unlike others before her, she was making it a priority.
“Thank you,” I responded. “I’m glad you’re happy.”
“And I’m glad you don’t regret it.”
“I can’t regret you, Manda. Never.”
The days of the trip passed too quickly. I took Amanda to some of the places I’d been while living there, holding her hand every chance I got. I stole as many kisses as I possibly could, but only in private or when I was too intoxicated to care. Amanda caught on that I wasn’t big on PDA, so she’d pull me into a dark side street to kiss me…always as if it were our last kiss.
We went out to lunch with Morgan and Jackson too. I’d wanted to see the little guy one more time before we left, and Amanda had convinced me that I’d regret it if I didn’t. She was pushing me to do things I’d never wanted to do, but confidence came with more pushes. I drove by the apartment Garrett and I had lived in, the place I used to work, and even my old therapist’s office.
I thought about visiting, but there was something I still didn’t want Amanda to know that only my therapist knew. Without a doubt, I knew she wouldn’t share anything with Amanda that I didn’t okay first, but I was still afraid of her being able to tell she was missing something.
Missing a big piece of my past.
