Page 72 of All of Him
I wanted him. His heart. His body. His past. Hisfuture.
I wanted all of him.
And I wanted him to have all of me too.
“Want to see my Christmas gift to myself?” Noah asked.
He walked into my apartment, smiling from ear to ear on Christmas Eve. Teel and Delia had cooked dinner and invited him over along with Dad, who hadn’t arrived yet.
“Sure,” I said. “Where is it?”
Noah wiggled his eyebrows and waved me out the door. I looked at Delia and Teel, who were clearly confused. I followed him outside anyway, then down the steps into the crisp December air. I hadn’t put on a coat in my rush to follow him, so I hugged my middle tightly with my sweater-covered arms.
“Like it?” Noah asked, pointing to a navy-blue SUV.
My jaw dropped, making him laugh.
“Come see the inside! You’re freezing!”
I quickly skipped over to him like an idiot and climbed into the driver’s seat, observing the black leather interior.
“I kept the truck, but I needed something more reliable. What do you think?”
“You bought a car,” I stated.
Noah nodded, smiling wider than I’d seen in a while. He was like a kid with a new toy.
“I’d been looking for one for a while, but I wasn’t sure if it was the right choice. This was a great holiday deal, so I just went with it.”
I smiled, reaching out and rubbing his arm.
“It’s awesome,” I said. “I’m happy for you.”
“But…” he continued, grabbing the hand that was on his arm.
I shivered more, though not from the cold that time. Noah touching me wasn’t something I was used to.
“But it’s below freezing outside,” I said nervously.
Noah laughed and moved so I could get out of the car, but he didn’t let go of my hand.
“I am happy for you, but it’s alsoreallycold. Take me for a spin in it tomorrow?”
“Absolutely.”
We started back to the stairs, Noah finally dropping my hand and stuffing his own into his pocket, as if he wanted to take back the gesture. I stopped, folding my arms over my chest, and waited for him to notice. Once he did, he closed his eyes and tilted his head back, defeated.
“Don’t read into that, Manda,” he begged, offering me a sad smile.
I clenched my jaw, feeling like he was yanking me around. It was irritating, and for the first time in months, I pushed him.
“What about that night on your porch? Should I read into that?”
Noah bit his lip, realizing I had a point, and stepped closer. I held my breath, no longer concerned about the frosty air as he wrapped his arms around me and kissed the top of my head. Tucking my head against his shoulder, I finally let myself inhale.
“I need to think,” he explained after a minute of silence.
I pulled away reluctantly, needing to see his face. Instantly, I regretted the decision, unsure of when I’d be able to be that close to him again. Noah stuffed his hands back into his pockets and glanced at me under heavy lashes.
