Page 30 of All of Him
“You’re not too bad yourself.”
17
Amanda
“YOU LIKESTARS?!” Isaid to myself on the way home from Noah’s. I hit the steering wheel repeatedly as I drove in frustration.
We had finally been having a nice moment, and I had to fuck it up with one of my classic, awkward one-liners. Not that it bothered him. I’d gotten a compliment after all, and he’d seemed to enjoy my shame.
Whether or not my awkward comment had gotten to Noah, I was still scolding myself. The unusual frustration probably had to do with the fact that I’d been asking him about an accident that hadkilledhis brother. Was I supposed to have known that? No, but I could have stopped prying after the first mention of it. I tried to tread carefully as it was with what had happened with his parents. But knowing what I did about his brother? I needed to handle Noah Murphy with kid gloves.
I’d gotten that smile out of him again though. That rare smile had proven to me that he had a light somewhere inside of him and that I held the power to bring it out. I wanted to test that power, to reach in and pull him out of the dark, but he didn’t have his hand outstretched for anyone to grab. Still, something told me to keep trying.
I pulled into my parking spot at the apartment and checked my phone. I had a text from Noah, surprisingly, and my heart skipped a beat at the sight of his contact photo.
Please don’t tell anyone about Garrett yet.
Got it,I responded.Thanks for sharing it with me. I know it wasn’t easy.
I expected for him to text me back, but I wasn’t sure why. I stared at my phone, willing a response. Part of me wanted to continue the conversation, but another part nudged me away from the idea. I wasn’t entitled to any more information. Noah had already shared more with me that night than he had with anyone in a while. I had to be grateful for that. But that didn’t mean I didn’twantto know more.
“Damn,” I said to myself, finally getting out of the car. “Why do I care so much?”
“Care about what?” Delia asked, falling into my line of sight. She was onlyjustreturning from work, pencil skirt and all.
I sighed, tucked my phone into my back pocket, and followed her into the building.
“Noah texting me,” I admitted.
Delia raised her eyebrows and unlocked the front door, letting us both in.
“Is something going on with him?” she asked before smirking. “Should I tell your sister about this?”
“There’s nothing to tell.” I laughed, playfully smacking her arm.
I flung myself onto the couch and blew out a long breath. Delia doubted my answer and folded her arms over her chest.
“We’re friends now, and he opened up to me a little.”
“He’s cute though, isn’t he?” she pushed.
“Yes, and my dumbass self already told him that, so it’s not a secret.” Delia laughed and sat next to me on the couch. She’d been around for a large portion of my life and knew me well. I didn’t talk about men—none had ever really interested me enough for that. So me bringing up Noah was likely quite the surprise for her.
“I just really want to get to know him better,” I attempted to explain.
“So, give it time,” she suggested, as if it were the easiest thing in the world. “He’s not going anywhere. You work together, and your dad is working on his house. You guys are obviously only going to get closer.”
I nodded, thinking ahead and wondering what we could be.
“It sounds like you guys should just let the friendship progress naturally, and everything will work out. Don’t push him.”
“Oh, I already made the mistake of pushing him.” I laughed sarcastically. “But even after the pushing, I feel like I only have a small fraction of his story.” Delia sighed and pulled her legs to her chest, kicking her pumps onto the ground.
“Do you know how long it took for me to get your sister to admit she wasn’t straight?”
I shook my head.
“I had a crush on her foryearswhile we were just friends. Only toward the end of sophomore year did I tell her that I liked her as more than a friend. Even though it had been so obvious to me the whole time that she wasn’t into guys, I never forced it out of her. I was patient, and it paid off.”
