Page 138 of Commanding Flame and Shield
Behind us, Ansel and Lana had turned Bing Crosby on the radio, and the crackling fire flickered light across the walls. Laughter seemed to reverberate through the small space, and we all drank our drams deeply. Happy, I realized with a start. I was happy. Here, with them. With our little family—soul group, whatever we might be. To whichever end this war would serve us, it would all be worth it for having foundthis.
I stayed to myself for a long while. The men continued raiding Aren’s collection of liquor, while the women whipped up treats. I watched the numbers tick down on the brand on Alvara’s arm—her rolled up, flour coated sleeve tucked just above it. He would die for that, too. For marring her body.
My eyes wandered upwards, quickly forgetting all violence as I soaked in Alvara’s jubilation. Flour dusted her arms nearly to her elbows, a streak across her cheekbone, as though she’d shoved her hair back. Alvara was forming balls of dough between her hands as they continued to laugh, and talk, telling endless stories with Fae and Lana, the three of them exchanging smiles over long-lost memories. Victories won, and friends lost.
She had emptied the last scoop of dough from the bowl and scraped a bit off with her finger to pop it in her mouth. When her gaze fell on mine, firelight flickering across those emerald eyes, lips still firmly wrapped around her finger, my balls tightened.Mine. And now she knew it all…I studied the way the skin around her eyes wrinkled when she smiled, the way her full lips parted. The way she moved.
You are the most beautiful thing I have ever seen. You’re all I’ve ever wanted. I love you, Alvara of Grayshell.
Without breaking her eyes from the bowl she was cleaning, she grinned and said, “I love you too, August of Grayshell.”
Her head snapped up, eyes wide with realization. Something like panic slithered into her expression, and I lunged forward, wrapping her tiny waist up in my arm, and pulling her against me. I brought my other hand up to cup her face and kissed her. Passionately, urgently, I poured everything I wanted to say into that kiss. She parted her lips for me, and I breathed her in as quickly as I could. But as her mind began to connect with my own, I peeled our lips apart, and stepped back.
“I’m ready when you are.” It was all I could think to say.
And then she was there, that fiery presence flickering back to life in the depth of my mind. A light in the darkness. Stronger and more present than the others. Stronger, I realized, because Marcus was right. She was my mine, and I was hers. That’s why her absence was physically hard. Why Ifeltwhen she was injured…
The entire room held their breath as the energy ebbed and swelled around Alvara. Eddies of power seemed to pour into her, and her eyes fluttered as her hands stretched out and flexed. Accepting the swell, I realized. Egging it on. Willing it back into place.
When she opened her eyes, the gold in her deep emerald irises began to glimmer. Alvara's power, I realized, was reunited with its wielder as well. Like a living entity, it too seemed to celebrate.
Alvara glanced down at her arm as the branding mark vanished. A debt made good. She rolled her neck and popped her knuckles. Simultaneously, the scrapes and bruises across her skin vanished as her healing restored as well. My breath came in a desperate whoosh of relief. And yet. And yet, I wanted to reach for her immediately, to keep the connection we had formed. To deepen it.
It was a different sentiment than the one in her mind as she focused on Aren and flashed that feline smile. “Let’s go get this son of a bitch.”
The Commander grinned.
FIFTY-FIVE
WORKING THEORY
ALVARA
It seemed Adrastoswasas sharp a seer as I was, and tracking the son of a bitch down did indeed turn into a clairvoyant volley. Just as August had anticipated, for each thread I pulled on, a new one spooled out. For each choice any of us made, there were five new directions they could go, and then ten as Adrastos adjusted as well.
We had interrupted our Christmas Eve tradition of cozying up at Aren’s cabin after sledding, to bake cookies, and watch movies, in order to get our asses back to Grayshell, and get a game plan that took things back under our control. My primary concern was what Saraya had found in my blood—ideally so we could create an antidote, but at the very least, duplicate it to keep the battlefield even. Even if Adrastos would inevitably know about it.
Cookies were still, naturally, essential on Christmas Eve, so Fae and Lana had continued the project in the common room kitchen as the rest of us marked maps, and sketched visions and plans. The timer chirped, and Fae jumped up from her perch on the side of Alec’s armchair and made for the kitchen, as I drifted away from the present.
I felt as though my body had frozen, stopped responding to my prompts. Concrete limbs for a mind working in overdrive. As my visions didn’t include the past, I couldn’t tell us what kind of bullshit the brothers had pulled while my gifts were out of commission. But whatever they’d done, the visions of their future were brighter. In stripping me so easily, in neutralizing Aren’s weapon, they had given themselves an intense advantage.
August was sitting on the floor below me, and I was vaguely aware of his warmth and pressure as he leaned against my knees. I couldn’t help wishing we’d had even an hour more to hold each other—to really hold each other. But a connection as strong as ours would take days to read back through if we weren’t interrupted. Weeks, perhaps, if there was a lot of depth to sort through, and given the binding on our memories, I assumed there would be. August sighed through his nose, reading my thoughts, and laid his head back on my thighs. I allowed myself to risk enough to run my fingers through his hair, so, so carefully. Cherishing even that simple intimacy. He closed his eyes and hummed, just as oblivious, it seemed, to Aren and Ansel’s current debate as I was.
More and more conflicts flashed through my head. All of which ended at the same damned bloody killing field, with August walking across it. And that was as far as I could get. There were too many threads after it. But the one of me, bloodied and broken, had indeed vanished.
So that much of Adrastos’ taunting and yapping was true then. He could not kill one of us to use the other.Soul bound. Interesting. I should have known as much—August was the only soul I had ever feared failing so much that I’d become prone to panic attacks, the only calling that brought that kind of desperation to my search. And, uniquely, intensely, perfectly my counterpart when it came to our gifts. Gifts and elements that could braid, connect, and lend strength to the other when needed. Soul bound, indeed.
A soft smile tugged on his full lips at that.Once I ascended, I nearly forgot about…everything. My old life. I thought I loved Layla, but it was like she was a distant dream as soon as we were together. I couldn’t explain it. Didn’t understand any of this soul group, soul bound, soul mate stuff.
I thought about that for a long moment, gave myself the space to process the flicker of guilt I’d had over Michael. Allowed myself to acknowledge that love long lost. Allowed myself to breathe and know that I was not dishonoring him in finding my true soul mate in August, and that he would want me to be happy, all these years later.
Threehundredyears later, Ally. Trust me. If he loved you half as much as I do, he would want this for you too.I blinked back the burning in my eyes.
I love you, August Porter. If all of this was necessary to get to you, I would do it all again. Even now, with this storm bearing down on…everything. I would do it all again.
“Ugh. You two are going to make me sick, can you focusplease?” Lana pinched the bridge of her nose, blinking dramatically. But there was mirth in her eyes, tugging at the corner of her lips. I shook my head. Ansel flashed that rare smile at his mate and rolled his eyes before turning his attention back to Aren.
“No promises,” August muttered under his breath, opening his eyes to look up at me, amusement flashing there.
