Page 9 of Starting Back
I smiled at her huff.
“I’m sure Aunt Peyton doesn’t mind. Why don’t we make a deal? I’ll promise to relax and have fun if you do. How does that sound?”
My heart broke a little at her resigned exhale. I loved when people commented that Chloe and I looked like twins. Same color hair and eyes, almost identical nose and cheekbones, and sometimes a slight resting bitch face even when nothing was bothering us.
But when I was her age, I laughed all the time and lived for fun on the weekends with my friends.
Since Colin and I’d decided to officially end it, I’d fallen down a miserable rabbit hole of self-doubt, burning the candle at both ends for my kids and going without the little things for myself. It was what prompted Nicole to plan this trip, and while I waved off her concerns about why I needed to get away, I finally got it.
Treating myself badly in front of my kids was setting a detrimental precedent for all of us. I’d get the most out of this break and work on being a better example upon my return.
“Uncle Jake wants to take us to the lake tomorrow.”
“Perfect, you love the lake. You and Mike can have a diving contest again, which I’d much rather than the all-night video game sparring I know you’ll do the whole time. Go and have fun. For me, okay?”
I cupped my forehead, wishing I could see her face right now. I watched her as closely as she watched me lately, constantly trying to decipher if she was still adjusting or if this was becoming a more serious issue.
There was no playbook for divorced parents. Therapists, family, and the internet all had different opinions, and it was hard to know who was right or what to do when your kid was struggling.
“I love you. I hate that you’re alone.”
I let out a long sigh as my gaze wandered back to the bar. Leo stood over my now-empty seat, his brow knitted together as he scooped up my glass. When his eyes met mine, I couldn’t help the smile on my face after his shoulders dropped as if he was relieved.
“I found a friend to talk to for the moment. I’m the adult and you’re the kid. I worry and you don’t. And I love you very much. Go annoy Mike, and don’t give me another thought.”
I pictured her reluctant nod as the call ended.
I needed about ten drinks to forget that conversation or the urge to fly home and scoop both my daughters into my arms and make them believe that we would all be just fine.
Which would be easier ifIbelieved that.
“Everything okay? How about a refill?” Leo’s hopeful smile triggered an odd pinch in my chest. For the past hour or so, the conversations we’d had made me feel, even for a moment, as if I were someone different—not a divorced mom still trying to navigate her way through a new life.
Reality had wormed its way into my attempt to escape it.
“I had to call my daughter, and I didn’t realize it was past dinnertime. I should probably eat after all this day drinking.” I motioned toward my empty glass. “Thanks for spending most of your shift with me.”
“Of course. What a good bartender does or should do.” He flashed an easy smile as he leaned closer. “My shift ends in an hour. I can help if you still need to be forced to have fun.” He lifted a shoulder before clearing his throat. “I assume since you’re alone, you don’t have set dinner plans.”
I chewed on my bottom lip, too surprised and tongue-tied at first to give him an answer.
“That’s a sweet offer, but—”
“They’re showing a movie on the beach tonight. They put up a big screen on the sand and set up a mobile bar and grill. If you’re staying here, you wouldn’t have to travel anywhere. You wouldn’t even need to change.” He raked his eyes down my body, heat searing my skin in their path. “Fun doesn’t have to be difficult. Could be easy, if you give it a chance.”
He made it seem too easy, and that made meuneasy as hell.
I nodded, blowing out a long breath. I could go back to the room, sit on the terrace, and worry about my kids all night, or I could keep my promise to my family and make the most of it.
This was what I was here for, right? Fun, relaxation, meeting new people. Being this affected by a man I’d just met confused me, especially after forcing it with Colin so many times in more ways than I could stomach to recall.
“I actually don’t have dinner plans. Movie on the beach sounds fun, as long as it’s notJaws.” I let out a nervous chuckle, giving Leo a smile I hoped didn’t look forced and would give away the flutters in my stomach.
“I don’t think so. Meet me back here at seven.”
His lips stretched into a megawatt, panty-melting smile that took my breath and my voice away for a moment as I nodded.
“Sounds good.”
