Page 35 of A Matter of Time
I had walked right into that one, hadn’t I? After the last few days, going out for drinks with Cam, even surrounded by other people, seemed like a terrible idea, but the pleading look that Marianne gave me was hard to resist.
“I’ll have to check my calendar,” I tried to demur, but as her face fell, I gave in. “But I’m pretty sure I’m free.”
If that kept up, I would soon be as much of a soft touch as Cam, but I tried to tell myself it would be fine. After all, how much worse could things get?
~Cam~
By the time Tonia returned to my office for our appointment that afternoon, she looked calm, cool and composed, and I did my best to match her. We stuck to business, neither of us alluding in any way to either the past or what happened the night before. From the outside, no one would have had a clue that we were anything more than business acquaintances.
Inside was a different matter. Inside, I couldn’t stop thinking about the way it felt to be with her again.
Her legs crossed as she adjusted on her chair, and I could almost feel those legs wrapped around me. A whiff of her perfume hit me as she leaned over to show me something on the screen, and I remembered the way it lingered in my room after she’d gone. She tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear, and I could hear the words I’d whispered to her the night before, the dirty words spoken directly against her skin.
Did I affect her the same way? Was she thinking about it too? Or was she really just as focused on work as she appeared to be?
When our time had finished, Tonia got to her feet and packed up her things, keeping her eyes on her bag as she spoke. “I’ve been invited to go out for drinks after work tomorrow with some other people from the office. I’m not sure if you were planning on going, but if it’s going to be a problem, I can make an excuse. This is your workplace, after all.”
Though I appreciated the consideration, I didn’t think avoiding each other was necessary. “For this month, it’s your workplace too. Don’t let me stop you from doing anything you’d normally do.”
Her response to that was a curt nod. “Alright. See you tomorrow, then.”
“See you tomorrow.”
When she had gone, I exhaled, perhaps in relief or perhaps in disappointment, which would be ridiculous. She’d done just what I asked in keeping things professional, so I had no earthly reason to be disappointed.
Sighing at myself and my contradictory emotions, I did my best to put it all out of my mind. I almost succeeded too, until I got home after work and found Marley waiting for me outside the door of my apartment building.
“Oh, come on,” I muttered under my breath. Why did the universe have it in for me? Normally, I wouldn’t mind talking to Marley, but she had probably shown up to apologize for telling Tonia what happened even after she swore she wouldn’t, and I really didn’t have it in me to rehash everything one more time. I had been planning on going to the gym and running on the treadmill until my lungs burned and I felt nothing except the pain in my muscles. It would be better than the dumpster fire inside my head.
“Tonia already told you, didn’t she?” Marley guessed as I walked up to where she stood. The way she twisted her hands nervously made her look a lot like the 16-year-old girl I’d known all those years ago.
“Of course she did,” I answered bluntly. “Did you think she wouldn’t?”
“No,” she admitted with a wince. “I always knew she was the kind of person who wouldn’t keep a secret.”
That stung, as she must have known it would. All those years, she insisted I’d done the right thing by keeping the truth from Tonia because Tonia would never have kept it to herself. In Marley’s eyes, she’d just been proven right.
“It’s not the same thing,” was all I said in response. “What brings you to town, anyway?”
“I’m here to check on my dad.” Marley’s dad had never fully recovered from the loss of his wife, and he’d never returned to Sandy Creek either. When word got out in town that Marley’s mother had died, other people from the church offered to take her in so she wouldn’t have to change schools. By the time I left for college, she had moved in with a family who had a teenage daughter of their own, and she and Marley became close friends.
Other than her mother dying, things had worked out pretty well for Marley, all things considered.
“Can I join you for dinner?” she asked me with a tentative smile. “My treat.”
Against my better judgement, I agreed. Partly, I just didn’t have the will to argue, and part of me was curious about exactly what she’d said to Tonia, even though it absolutely should not matter to me. “You don’t need to buy me dinner. I’ve got some steaks upstairs, come on.”
Marley had been to my apartment once before, the last time she was in town, so she made herself at home, fixing a salad while I quickly grilled the steaks. Not being allowed to have a proper barbecue was really my only complaint about living in an apartment building. Otherwise, it suited me just fine.
Sitting down with the steak, salad and a beer at the table on my balcony, Marley launched into her explanation, telling me exactly what she’d said to Tonia. None of it surprised me; she’d told her the whole story as far as she knew it.
“I knew after we talked last week that you were all worked up about Tonia again, and then I heard that you were at the hospital with her over the weekend.”
I almost had my mouth open to ask where she heard that until I remembered the Sandy Creek rumour mill and closed it again. Dumb question.
“I just thought it would be better to get it all out in the open, finally, and you could finally know for sure if you two have any chance of getting back together.”
Did I want that? Had I secretly been hoping for it all these years? I hadn’t thought so, but after what happened the night before, I couldn’t really deny it either. Somewhere deep inside, I must have had a secret fantasy that when Tonia knew the truth, she would admit she’d been wrong not to trust me, and she’d want to pick up right where we left off.
