Page 51 of Fake it For Good
“Hell no,” I said with a laugh. “You gave him up fair and square.”
“That was before I knew what I was getting into,” she groaned.
“How many have you been on?” I asked her.
We headed for the clothing racks and started the search. We never really knew what we were looking for. It was all about the browsing and finding the good stuff. I had gotten more than one designer skirt and top just by putting in the time and effort to dig deep.
“Two,” she replied from the other side of the rack.
“Wow! That’s what, ten grand?”
“Six,” she said, sighing. “I think I’m going to charge more if they say they are in IT. I went out with a guy two nights ago. He spoke an entirely different language. It was code this, driver this, more code and a bunch of other words I didn’t understand. It was awful.”
“Where did you guys go?” I asked.
“The first one wasn’t bad,” she said. “It was just a dinner with his parents. It was the last one that killed me. If I could have stuck a screwdriver in my ears, I would have done it. We went to a tech conference. Tech. You know how much I hate computers. I can’t even program my Roomba correctly. It was three hours of nerd-speak. Everyone he introduced me to was the same way. I have never felt more out of place in my life. I swear I fell asleep three times.”
I laughed at her misery. “I’m sorry. That does sound pretty bad. Can we request not to go on certain dates?”
“We always get to approve the dates, but I told myself it couldn’t be that bad,” she said. “I mean seriously, when you’re getting paid that kind of money, you can deal with anything. At least that’s what I thought.”
“Honestly, I feel very lucky to have gotten the job with Cane,” I told her.
“Don’t rub it in.”
“You’ll get a good one,” I said.
“I’m hoping I get one like your toymaker,” she said, laughing. “Third time is the lucky one, right?”
“For your sake, I hope so,” I replied.
With nothing catching our eye, we meandered to the housewares section. My entire apartment had been furnished with secondhand stuff. Technically, I imagined a lot of it was third or even fourth hand. Buying new just seemed so wasteful.
“Oh, look at this!” I held up a ceramic cat. It was a joke between us. It had been after a long night of drinking, and I had been certain I was going to spend the rest of my life alone. The date I’d been out on had been horrible. I decided I was destined to live with a hundred cats. The next day, Marie had given me a ceramic cat.
“No,” she said firmly. “That was a joke. You cannot start collecting cats. That’s just wrong. You are not going to be an old spinster with twenty cats. You keep putting that out into the universe and it’s going to come true.”
I put the cat back on the shelf. “Fine, but if I’m sixty and my house is empty, I’m blaming you. This is one very cute cat I’m passing up.”
“You’re not going to need it,” she said. “Besides, you’ve got a very handsome hunk already.”
“Uh, he’s not mine. He’s paying me to pretend he’s mine. Cane is this wealthy, powerful man that should be on the cover of a men’s magazine. He should be wearing boxers on a billboard. He’s gorgeous. Every woman should get to see a masterpiece like him at least once in their lives.”
“Now, you’re just bragging.”
“I am not going to forget the man in a long, long time,” I said.
“Do you think you’ll get the chance to do him again?” she asked.
“Do him? When did we step into the locker room?”
“I’m living vicariously through you,” she said. “You’re getting to fly in private jets and have sex with a hot guy. I’m stuck with guys that have probably never given a woman an orgasm in their lives.”
“I’m really sorry,” I said again. “If you’re trying to make me feel guilty for taking the date, it’s almost working. But to be fair, this is my niche. Could you talk toys for hours?”
“If I had the chance to get that man in bed, I’d play with toys for hours,” she shot back.
I wasn’t going to be jealous. Cane was a hot dude. It made sense he’d be desired by a lot of women. He wasn’t just attractive. He had charisma and was very normal. He didn’t flash his AmEx black card like it was a sign of wealth. He just did his thing.
