Page 88 of Mistletoe Mistake
I still didn't want any alcohol, so I asked for water instead. At least with Cole leaving the next day, I wouldn't have to keep making up excuses to avoid drinking with him. In another week or two, I should be able to take a pregnancy test and put my mind to rest about the whole thing.
When we both had our drinks, he sat down opposite me. I couldn't quite read the look on his face as he took a deep breath. “Before I tell you what she said, I just want to make it clear that it doesn't change anything between you and me.”
That didn't necessarily make me feel any better. What could she have said that would necessitate that kind of warning? “I'm assuming she didn't apologize,” I guessed, trying to make him smile.
It worked. His lips curved upward, just slightly. “Hardly. She wanted money.”
My mouth fell open in disbelief. He couldn't be serious. “What happened to the money she already took from you?”
Cole laughed darkly. “I asked that exact question, but she didn't give me an answer.” His face turned serious once more, and he leaned closer to me, looking me straight in the eye. “The reason she thought I might give her money now was to support her daughter. A daughter that she claims is mine.”
My mouth opened again, but no sound came out. I hadn't been expecting that at all, and I could only assume that Cole hadn't either. His face held no clues as to how he felt about it. He only looked concerned about me and my reaction. He’d just said it didn't change anything between us, but maybe he thought it would for me?
“Is it true?” I managed to ask, realizing he had used the word 'claims'.
“I don't know, but it could be. At the time she left me, she had told me she was pregnant. I thought afterwards that she’d been lying, but perhaps she wasn’t. It's possible.”
“Either way, it's awful,” I couldn't help pointing out. “Either she lied to you in the first place and is lying again now, or she's telling the truth and she kept your own child from you all this time.”
Cole's look of concern softened into a gentle smile. “Yes. She's awful. You'll get no argument from me on that.”
That was some good news, at least. It didn't seem like seeing her again had rekindled any old feelings on his side, as Annabel suggested it might. But how was the news affecting him? I remembered what he'd said just the night before when I asked him about whether he liked kids. What did he think now that he might suddenly have one that he never knew about?
“How are you feeling about it?” I asked, trying to keep the question as open-ended as possible.
He leaned back and rubbed his hand over his face. “Honestly, I don't know. When we were together and she told me about the pregnancy, I was excited about it. And if there really is a little girl, and she's mine, then I want to know her. I want to be there for her, and it bothers me how much I would have missed already. It would kill me that she was out there all this time and I didn't know it. But I'm trying not to get angry or hopeful or anything, really, because I still don't even know if it's true. Does that make sense?”
“Of course it does,” I assured him. It made perfect sense to me, and it made me glad to know that he would want to be a part of his daughter's life, if he really had one. “For what it's worth, I think you're taking it very well.”
“I guess so. I don't know if there's a standard way to deal with something like this." He grew quiet for a second, his dark eyes examining my face closely. "You're taking it well too. Does it bother you that I might suddenly have a kid I didn't know anything about?”
Was that what he'd been worried about? I couldn't see that he'd done anything wrong at all. “Cole, you never lied to me about anything. You were honest with me about your past, and that's all I could ask for. You couldn't tell me about something you didn't know yourself. No one can prepare for every possibility, no matter how many rules you try to put in place.”
I gave him a playful nudge, and he narrowed his eyes at me in that way of his that told me he was actually amused.
“I told you that I want to be with you,” I continued. “And that includes dealing with new things that come up. Life's going to keep throwing things at us, at both of us. After the year I've had, I know better than anyone that you can never tell what's coming around the corner. Having your support these past two weeks has been amazing, and I will support you too, for as long as you want me to.”
Genuine relief flashed in his dark eyes. “Gemma, that sounds, as you would say, ‘bloody brilliant’.” He put on his fake British accent again for the last two words, making me laugh. He smiled back at me, his eyes warm with humour. “I'm so glad it doesn't bother you, but to be honest, I somehow knew it wouldn't. I knew I didn't need to be afraid to tell you, and the fact that I can tell you things, even hard things, means a lot to me."
He took my hand in his, rubbing his thumb across the top of it, his touch firm but soft at the same time.
"I guess this is as good a time as any to talk about what happens next.”
I assumed he meant what happened next with us, and I was very curious to hear what he would suggest. He had mentioned the night before that he didn't have a plan, so had he come up with one in the meantime?
“I have to fly back to New York tomorrow, as I always planned,” he began. “There are several things coming up that I can't miss. But once the end of the year is out of the way, I want to see you as much as possible. So, I want to know: how flexible is your work? Do you need to live here in London?”
I honestly hadn’t anticipated that he would want me to move, but on the other hand, it shouldn’t have surprised me either. Cole never did anything by half-measures.
I'd also never really thought about living somewhere else, but I couldn't think of any particularly good reason not to. What did I have to keep me in London? My job, of course, but now that we had the contract with Cole, most of my time would be spent designing for him anyway, and I could do that anywhere. I had Holly too, but I knew she would kill me if I turned down a chance to move forward with Cole because of her. She would probably stick me in a packing crate and ship me off to him herself.
Clearly, I had no family worth sticking around for. So, what was there to stop me?
“I don't need to live here,” I heard myself saying. “I would need to visit occasionally to spend time at the office, but it doesn't need to be full-time.”
Cole smiled widely, that genuine, almost boyish grin of his that I absolutely loved. “And how would you like to live in New York?”
“You want me to move in with you?” I wanted to be sure I understood the question correctly and hadn’t read too much into it.
