Page 69 of Then and Now
I pull back slightly and cup her face in my hands. “How ‘bout you let me decide if I’m going to worry about something. And right now, I’m worried about you. Are you still processing what happened last night? You know you can stay here as long as you need to. Hell, forever would be fine.”
“We arenottalking about me moving in yet, okay?”
Her kiss softens the blow of that statement, but only slightly. Because the truth is, I want her here every goddamn day for the rest of our lives.
“Fine. Then what is it?”
“Geez, okay, okay. Stop the interrogation, I’ll talk.”
Satisfied, I step back in and wrap my arms around her again. She doesn’t speak right away, but I wait her out.
“There’s just a lot right now, you know?”
I nod, knowing she can feel the motion.
“And as much as I want to admit I’m totally in over my head, barely keeping up with the game of emotional whack a mole going on inside of my mind, I’m also terrified to do that.”
“Why?” I can’t help but ask.
I feel her shrug. “Because ever since I moved here, I’ve been thestrong one. The independent, don’t need nobody, especially not a man, take charge kind of woman. That’s not the type of person who openly admits they’re drowning under the weight of too much responsibility.”
“I disagree,” I say softly. “That’sexactlythe kind of person who does that. Because admitting when you need help, when you need someone to lean on,thatis true strength.”
Serena tilts her h up to look at me, a knowing expression on her face. “You sound like that’s a lesson you’ve recently learned yourself.”
“Yeah, it is,” I answer honestly. “It took coming here, letting my family help me with Violet, and lettingyouhelp me with Violet to help me realize that it doesn’t make me any less of a father if I don’t do it all myself.”
Serena doesn’t say anything for a minute or two, but there’s no rush to fill the silence. So much has happened in the last twenty-four hours, I can tell she needs some time to sort through her thoughts.
“Being here with you, it feels so good, so right. This is almost everything I’ve ever wanted, and yet I feel guilty that I’m so happy, especially after last night.” She nuzzles in closer, and I kiss the top of her head.
“You have nothing to feel guilty about, Tippy. But what do you mean by almost everything?”
I feel the rise and fall of her chest. “Having you in my life again, being free to love you again, it’s a dream come true. Yet, I can’t help but feel like I’m trading one dream for another because I’m terrified I’m going to lose my dance studio. I’m running out of time. And now the repairs that are needed after last night — I don’t have the money or the time to wait for insurance to pay. But I also don’t know if I could find a buyer without fixing things. And if I lose the studio, I lose dance.”
I hold her a little bit tighter. “Not gonna lie, it feels damn good hearing you say being with me is a dream come true. But I get it, baby. I get why you feel guilty for being happy, even though I wish you didn’t. Because you deserve to be happy. And I hope you know I’ll do whatever I can to help you save the studio because that studioisyou. Teaching might not have been your first choice, but honestly, you’re incredible at it.”
Her face tips up to mine, and our lips meet in a soft kiss. I finally feel some of the tension ease from her body.
“Thank you. Seriously, being with you, having your strength in my life, it does make it easier to bear all of this. The thing is, I love teaching as much as I loved dancing professionally. Truthfully, I did envision myself opening a studio eventually. I just figured I’d have longer as a professional ballerina first. But now all of that is on the line.”
I hate that the conversation has shifted its focus onto something this depressing, but maybe she’s right, and losing the studio is almost a foregone conclusion. If that’s the case, all I can do is hope that she’ll lean on me for emotional support or more. No matter what, I’ll be here with her throughout whatever happens.
“Do you think the studio would sell quickly?”
“Yeah, I know it will. There’s someone down in Victoria that came around last year asking if I wanted a partner. I said no at the time, but they emailed me again a couple of months ago asking if anything had changed. I’m guessing if I reached out, they would buy it up quick.”
“Would they let you stay on as teacher?”
“Maybe.” She shrugs, and I can tell the nonchalance she’s trying to convey is faint, at best. “Even if they didn’t let me teach, I’m not going anywhere. Dogwood Cove is home.”
My head falls forward, heavy with relief. And now it’s Serena’s turn to cup my face, forcing me to look at her.
“You’re my home, Leo. You and Violet. I believe you’ll help me figure this out, and no matter what, I’m not going anywhere.”
The lightness in my heart and my head makes me dizzy with an impulsive need to show her how I feel hearing that. My hands go down to her ass, and I lift Serena up, spin around, and set her on the table — thankfully, it’s not covered in the usual mess of crayons, sippy cups, and paper.
“Leo, what are you doing?” She laughs, and that sound is music to my ears.
