Page 108 of The Devil's Reward
Neither of us speaks as I carefully pull out of her and then set her on her feet. I make quick work of washing us both before turning off the shower, grabbing some towels from under the sink, and drying us both off. When we’re not soaking wet, I carry her to the bed. I wrap her in my arms as we lay together.
I let myself have a few small moments to bask at the feel of her in my arms. I need this more than I thought.
Our small silence is broken when Quinn says seriously, “Is it over, Shadow? All of it? Whatever is happening with you and the mafia? Now that the Dmitri guy is dead?”
I don’t want to lie to her. “Our battle with Dmitri is over, but it’s well known that mafia guys are like cockroaches. When one dies, more will step forward. Now that they’re in our town, it’s going to be hard to get them completely out, but there’s no more threat to the club.”
I can tell my answer isn’t the one she wanted, but she slowly nods. “But we’re safe, right? They won’t be coming after me for revenge? Or Macy?”
“No,” I say firmly. “You’re safe. They won’t come after you or Macy. And they may even leave us alone because they don’t want to cause trouble with us now that we’ve taken out their leader.”
“You took him out,” she said pointedly. “You’re sure they won’t come after you specifically?”
I shake my head. “The only ones who know I killed him are us, Dagger, and the henchmen. As far as anyone else is concerned, it was a team effort.”
She looks like she doesn’t quite believe that. “I need to know that Macy is safe going forward, Shadow. This could have ended so badly, especially if she hadn’t been in the pantry. Your lifestyle is dangerous, and I can’t be with someone who is going to put my child in danger.”
I’m quiet as I digest her words. How do I convince her not to give up on us? Not yet. Not now. Not when I just got her back in my arms. I sit up, hauling her with me, making her sit facing me on my lap. “Our way of life is normally quiet, Quinn,” I tell her honestly. “Like I told you before, we party, sure, but nothing dangerous. We don’t do illegal shit like sell drugs or run guns or pimp women. We do charity runs and volunteer and make donations. We like to live our way, and sure, some of that living might straddle a line, but this is not the normal. Can I promise that shit won’t reverberate down the line, no, but I promise that I will protect you. If there is a whiff of danger, I can send you to a safe house, or I’ll put a brother on you twenty-four-seven. I will do whatever I have to to make you feel safe with me. To make you feel like you can trust Macy and her safety with me.
“Don’t give up on us when we’ve barely gotten started, Quinn. Let me prove it to you. Your life doesn’t have to change, and I’m not going to treat you like your ex. You and Macy are important to me, and you know I will protect you with my life. I will also make you happy, piss you off, and give you the best sex of your life. You won’t want for anything, and you also have the added protection of the club. They will protect you with everything they have if something ever happened to me. You would never have to wonder if you were going to have to do it all alone again. Just give me a chance to prove it to you.”
“And Sam?” she asks quietly.
“Sam is a part of my past, Quinn, and I can’t change that. She will always be important to me, because of the lessons I learned from her. Hell, she’s the one who told me that when I found the right woman to hold tight and never let go. That advice wasn’t about her, Quinn. I fully believe she sent you to me, and sent that little hellion of a daughter you have. Both to let me know that you are my forever, but also to pay me back for all the shit I did to her when we were in the Forces. She liked to pull pranks, and I liked to get even. But she is not you, Quinn, and I’ll spend the rest of my life showing you that. I’ll honor her on certain days, but I won’t compare you. Because you are Quinn Holt, the most important woman in my life, and she is Sam Nolans, former friend and teammate.”
Quinn is silent as she searches my face. I let her see it all. Every promise and all the sincerity I have. I need her to believe me. Finally, she says, “I want us to work, Shadow, but I’m telling you right now that if the club gets involved in dangerous shit, I’m walking away. My heart might break, but my daughter and her life are more important. And if I think you’re comparing me to Sam, I’m done. I want to be loved as I am, not by someone else’s measuring stick.”
I nod. “That’s fair. I promise you won’t regret giving me a chance, Quinn.”
She goes quiet for some moments, then asks shyly, “Did you mean it earlier? When you said you loved me? Or was that just a heat of the moment thing?”
So she did hear me. I bite back a smile, cup her face in my hands and kiss her. When I pull away, I murmur, “I meant it. I love you, Quinn. Just as you are. How beautiful you are when you smile, the way you manage Macy with only the mom-look, the way you listen, and the way you scream my name when you cum.” Her face flames red. “We don’t need to rush into anything, but I’m not going anywhere. I want, when you and Macy are both ready, for us to be a family. I want more children with you, and I want to adopt Macy. I want you as my Old Lady, and I want you to wear my patch so that every bastard around knows just how lucky I am.”
“You are good with words,” she says with a bashful smile. “I love you too. If I didn’t, I think I would be running the other way.”
I kiss her again, and this time when I roll her onto her back, I take my time. Bringing her to the edge time and time again, murmuring words that probably don’t make a lot of sense, but I pour everything I am into making her feel my love.
When we’re spent, she chuckles. “Is now a good time to mention that my parents are going to be visiting soon? You might want to hold off any declarations of love until after you meet them.”
I wave that away. “Your parents will love me. I can be charming.”
“Oh, I have no doubt they’ll love you, but my mother and sister are a lot like Rose,” she says with a slow smile.
I raise my head and stare at her. She holds my gaze, eyes still shadowed, but teasing. I give a long groan. “They’re never allowed to meet,” I declare. “We don’t need any more trouble. I don’t think my wallet can handle the extra expense.”
She laughs. “Dad can help you out with that. I’m sure he’s had to consider bail before.”
He sounds like a smart guy, but if a man needs a bail fund, that doesn’t bode well. No, we’ll keep them away from each other. For the sake of my sanity and my wallet.
FIFTY-FIVE
QUINN
I need to bleach my brain.
I’m so excited I’m shivering with it. They’re finally almost here, and after nearly a year of not seeing them, I know I’m going to cry like a baby. I glance again at the screen above my head and see their flight has arrived, which means they’ll be out very soon. My heart starts to pound.
The last few days have been a whirlwind of emotion. I’ve had nightmares almost every night, but Shadow has always been there to wake and soothe me. Macy has been sleeping just fine, and she hasn’t so much as hinted about going home. Shadow said we could, but I think we both weren’t quite ready to be out of each other’s sight just yet. Not to mention, I’ve been spending a lot of time with Rose, Sage, Izzy, and Syn. Those ladies are a hoot, and I love them to pieces.
