Page 50 of The Devil's Reward
Then my empire will grow, and I’ll be able to take my rightful seat.
TWENTY-SEVEN
QUINN
Something tells me this date is going to be interesting.
I’m a wreck. An absolute wreck. I spent far too much time this morning picking out a nice outfit that I could wear at work and then out with Shadow. I need to pick up Macy at the school and then head straight over to the restaurant to make it on time. Which means no time to go home and change. The only problem is that I’ve spent all day freaking out about it.
Okay, not the date itself, but the kiss. No, kisses. He kissed me more than once, and I dreamt about it, and, uh, other things, most of the night. To the point that I worked myself up into a state this morning, worried that I’m moving too fast. What kind of mother welcomes a man into her home, practically begs him to kiss her, and grinds herself on top of him like a cat in heat?Oh, that would be me. I’m not sure I can face him today.
I’ve debated canceling half a dozen times but I keep chickening out, my family’s words from last night keeping me from following through. Well, that and the fact that I want to see him and prove to myself I’m not crazy. So instead, I keep freaking out while trying to focus on my work. Thankfully I’m light on appointments today, which means I’m not making a total fool of myself, but I’ll be glad when tonight is over.
My anxiety is through the roof as quitting time approaches. I try not to worry about what Macy is going to say about this, but she did technically okay me going out with him.
God, when did I start to allow my five-year-old to dictate my dating life? I need some serious help.
I glance at the clock again, and I swallow hard as I realize I need to leave in the next fifteen minutes. My phone buzzes and I see a message from my sister in the family group chat.
Peyton: DO NOT CANCEL! WE WILL KNOW.
Damn it. I should have known she would guess where my head is at right now.
Me: I haven’t canceled.
Peyton: But you’re thinking about it.
Me: …
They don’t knowwhyI’m thinking of canceling. Or about that kiss. I haven’t told them about that either.
Peyton: Don’t do it, Quinn. You’ll regret it for the rest of your life. Just go and have fun. Then call me with all the details when you get home.
Mom: Unless you’re getting busy! Then morning will be fine (winking emoji)
Me: Macy is going to be with us, and there will be no getting busy.
Peyton: Macy does have a bedtime, and that kid sleeps like the dead. Just make sure the door is locked and keep the screaming to a minimum.
Oh my God. I just can’t with this. Surely Shadow won’t want to do that. He said we’ll take things slow and I believe him. Sex on the first date isnotslow. Despite everything last night, I know I’m not ready for that yet. Well, not until he kisses me a few more times, then I might change my mind.
My phone buzzes again, and my heart pounds when I realize that it’s Shadow.
Shadow: Still good for five?
With trembling fingers I type back my answer.
Me: Still good. We’ll see you then.
Well, I’m committed now. No way can I back out. My stomach sinks and I have to take deep breaths to keep from passing out. I need to get a grip, because Macy needs me to be calm and collected. For all I know, he’s secretly an asshole and last night was just a fluke.
Alright, I know that’s a stretch, but I’m not going to completely rule it out.
I glance at the time again and start shutting everything down. I have ten minutes to be in my car and pulling out of here, and I need to make sure I’m on time. My phone buzzes again; this time it’s my mother.
Mom: I think she’s ignoring us.
I quickly type back a response.
