Page 118 of Off the Mark
Dean sipped his coffee in silence, mulling this over. “I wasn’t worried. Or mad. I knew it would work out okay. You’re my brother, Rowan. We’ve been looking out for each other since we were four years old. Even if you had to move mountains with your bare hands, I trusted that you’d protect my job. Protect the program we’ve poured everything into.”
I tossed him a smile. “You’re givin’ me a whole lot of credit.”
“Yeah, but that’s what you did, wasn’t it?”
I nodded after a second. “I kept telling Luciana that cutting you, cutting Eddie, eliminating the program wasn’t an option. She agreed. The board did too, but it didn’t seem like there was a way to save it. When they asked me to apply, I told her that I wanted the job.Andthat you had to stay. I’ll need a few months to pull together an actual plan to refund the program, but I met Leonard and Gloria Wilkinson last night, and they asked if they could come out for a visit.”
Dean’s eyebrows shot up. “Those Philly donors that Elaine was always trying to meet? Damn, how’d that happen?”
I swallowed roughly. “Charlie introduced us.”
“Ah, I see. Remind me to thank Charlie the next time I see her.” He considered the couch and the disheveled pillows. “If Charlie did something cool, like set you up with one of the best donors in the city, why the hell did you sleep here last night?”
I settled back onto the couch with a heavy sigh. “We got into a fight. She and I tend to do this thing where we get vulnerable and then push people away. Or, in my case when it comes to dating, I never evenstartto let people in. I felt like she was running…from this, from us…and got scared. Then I might have pushed her a little too much without owning everything I’d done wrong too.”
I cast my eyes to the ceiling. “I’m not some saint now or anything, but when Charlie met me, I was, what, twenty-one? Twenty-two? It was peak fucking around time for me. She saw a lot of shit, and I wish I could go back in time and change it. But I can’t. I know that Charlie trusts me, know it ’cause I canfeelit. When it comes to dating and being serious though? I can’t blame her for worrying I’ll bail when it gets hard. I’m worriedshe’lldo the same thing.”
I flashed him a grim smile. “We share a similar relationship pattern. When we were faking it for her reputation, it was easier to ignore all these little ways that we’d hurt each other in the past without realizing it.”
Dean sipped his coffee, nodded thoughtfully. “All the real-life issues are a challenge, that’s for sure. You’re starting to share a life together. There’s gonna be compromises and disagreements. Ways that you’ll miscommunicate and hurt each other. The difference is how you show up when it happens. Because if Charlieislike you, then she’s used to bouncing whenever things get complicated.”
I mentally tallied up the microscopic info I knew about her dating history and love life. “Yep. Yep, that sounds about right.”
He slowly spun his wedding ring. “For me, marrying Tabitha didn’t change much. Wedding or not, I’m committed to her forever. And if that’s the way you feel about Charlie, then you’ll figure out all the complicated stuff. The communicating and the compromising. You just have to stay and face it all together. One day at a time.”
A clever grin appeared on his face. “Have you reconsidered how many breakfasts you’d cook her in the morning?”
I huffed out a tired laugh. “I have and I swear to god, it’s like…a million. A million breakfasts. How do you get anything done now that you have Tabitha?”
“I stopped getting shit done like, six months after we started dating.” He inclined his head. “No offense to my new boss. Speaking of, should we head to work?”
I scrambled around for my phone. “We should because I guess I’m in charge now. But I should call Charlie first, right? I’ll call her now. Wait, should I though?”
Dean was pressing his lips together like he was desperately trying not to smile. “Let’s get to work first and then strategize your forgiveness tour. I would also take a shower and change, if I were you. You look like a damn anvil just fell on your head.”
29
CHARLIE
“What do you think?” I asked, holding up the door-sized poster. “Too cheesy? Or just cheesy enough?”
Tabitha peeked out from under Elaine’s—now Rowan’s—desk and flashed me a double thumbs up. “When it comes to little kids drawing signs, is there genuinely such a thing astoo cheesy? Also, how did you get them to draw all of that so last minute?”
I peered down the hallway. The group of mostly third graders peeking at me from the playground shrieked with laughter and ran away. “It turns out there are tiny dirt bike racing fans everywhere. I walked out there to say hey, and a whole cluster of kids recognized me.”
It’d been almost too cute to handle, watching them draw their names and color in around the message. Because these kids were regulars here at the center and neighbors of Rowan in South Philly and clearly adored him. When they were done, the butcher paper readCongratulations Mr. Rowan!!!!in big block letters. Around it, kids scribbled messages and designs, and even other staff came through, clearly delighted by the news.
By the time I made it back to the office to show Tabitha, my cheeks hurt from smiling.
“That sounds about right,” she said, voice muffled as she dusted across the top of the blinds. “You saw Rowan at Alice’s house the other night. He’s all swagger until it’s something he trulywantsand then he turns bashful. But he’s practically the mayor here and won’t ever admit it.”
She turned and tossed me the feather duster with a wink. “That’s why he’s gonna love this surprise, Charlie. You done good, girl.”
I assessed the room, which was already looking a ton better even after an hour of cleaning and organizing. Last night, Rowan had described the state of Elaine’s office as a kind of chaotic struggle that stressed him out. As soon as we’d walked in here with cleaning supplies and framed photos, I understood why.
This office situation wasdire.
It was a tiny gesture, but I’d enlisted Tabitha to help me make Rowan’s first day as theofficialexecutive director as welcoming as possible, complete with the giant, kid-drawn welcome sign. We made sure not to disrupt anything that was already out, but we’d opened the windows and scrubbed every surface, and I’d placed a large bouquet of sunflowers on the table by his desk.
