Page 80 of Seeking Stars
"Why are you sorry?"
"I… well, good question. I guess it's because we haven't really talked about where we're at, how private we're keeping things, if we're looking into something open or exclusive or…"
"Right." Even through the reduced size of her phone screen she could see him rub the back of his neck. "I suppose we should talk about that. I thought I might wait until we were together in-person again, but maybe best to do it now."
"Yeah, it probably is. Questions are already coming up and I'd like us to know where exactly we stand, so that when my friends or my parents ask, I know what to say. Mom and Dad ask me periodically if I have a boyfriend, so I want to be prepared."
"Boyfriend?" The spark in his eyes had humor and something else.
She half-cringed, half-smiled. "God, I don't remember what the cool way to do this is. I've been out of the dating pool for too long."
"How about we keep it simple? Let's share what we want and see where we're at. No games, just honesty."
"Okay." She took a calming breath. "I'll start with something I think we have in common: even though it's hard to know where this is going, I'd like to give it a chance. I'm in it. I jumped in, and I'm not going to quit until I've given it a fair chance."
He grinned. "Yes, I'm there with you. If this seems to be working out— and it is— then I'm not interested in a fling."
"Same." Lightness filled up her chest. "If it feels good between us— and it does— then this is meant to be a real start to something that matters to us."
"I like how you said that."
"Okay, another thing. What do you think about keeping it private?" She watched his eyes, seeking as much of his truth as she could gather.
"Private in what way? I don't want to hide it but, well, I half-expected you would." He frowned.
"Me? From my friends?"
"No, in general. I thought that maybe you wouldn't want people knowing we're seeing each other, because of your worries over your professional reputation."
His words trickled down her consciousness, clinking against different walls in her body and mind. While that fear hadn't changed, choosing to be with Liam couldn't be reduced to that one question.
"But what's the alternative?" she asked. "I already made up my mind. I want to be with you. Really, the only thing I can do is keep working and creating, and try not to think about what could happen if someone judges me for being with you. I'll keep fighting to do what I love."
"I hope you know, even if it doesn't work out— if we discover we're not good together— I would still do what I can to help you. I know I'm the safest one here. So, if you want to keep it private, I think I can live with it, for now, until you feel safer."
Her heart skipped a beat at his offer, but she shook her head. "I don't want that kind of privacy. I don't want to make it a secret. I want to be able to tell my parents, my friends, and anyone else who might believe me." She chuckled. "That's different than publicizing it, right?"
"I'm all for that. I'd like to go out with you, be together… but we don't have to discuss it with anyone else. We won't let it be used for PR. I just want it to be about you and me."
"I'm good with that. Let's ignore the noise."
He smiled, slow. "Sounds great."
Her grin echoed his. Words spilled out of her. "I want to kiss you right now. We haven't kissed enough."
"Exclusively?" he asked, a spark in his eyes, a slight curve to his eyebrow. After a bit, he added, "You said you also wanted to talk about exclusivity."
She nodded, her stomach tensing. "When we see each other… well, I expect us to have sex… if you want."
"If I want it? If?" he scoffed. "I get hard every time we talk."
She laughed.
"If you don't mind me saying that," he added.
"I don't, of course I don't. I guess I'm surprised— you didn't let me touch you that time. You seemed okay with just touching me."
His smile grew devious. "I'm glad to see you’ve thought about me touching you."
