Page 43 of Good Girls Like it Dirty
She hadn’t, and he’d pondered on asking his lawyer to take care of the problem. He hadn’t been in a hurry at first, because they dealt with sharing their assets in such a smooth manner. Now he wanted to move on from that chapter of his life.
“I saw you arrive with Monique, so I’ll be quick,” she said, her voice surprisingly nice.
At least she didn’t call Monique names this time. He kept his spine locked in place, prepared for whatever she had to tell him, not fully disarmed yet. “What’s up?”
“This isn’t the best time or place, but I always seem to wait for the best time then it’s too late,” she said, a touch of sadness gleaming in her eyes. She reached for his hand on the table and squeezed it.
He glanced down at her hand on top of his, uncomfortable. Quickly, he removed his and placed it on his lap. “What’s wrong?” he said, thankful the group around them were engrossed in their lively political chat and didn’t seem to hear what they were talking about.
Tears brimmed at her eyelids, and she looked away for a second before darting her gaze back at him. “I can’t bring myself to sign the divorce papers. I’m sorry.”
He swallowed, an uneasy sensation settling in his gut. He much preferred Ashley being the type-A, controlling perfectionist than this toned-down, more emotional version. “Ashley, why not? You wanted the separation. You left our house,” he said, hesitating to call it a home.
She wiped the single tear streaming down her cheek. “I know,” she said in a small voice. “Can’t people make mistakes? That was mine. When I thought you could have cheated on me while we were together, I was so upset. Upset for days and I didn’t know why. Sure, my female ego was bruised, but it was more than that. I couldn’t see you moving forward because, well, it didn’t feel right. Us being apart doesn’t feel right.”
He thrust his fingers into his hair, feeling his pulse throbbing in his throat. Shit. Despite her petty ways recently, he didn’t want to hurt her. They’d tried. “You know…it’s unfair of me to say you left. We both jumped ship long before you called it. You just called it.” And for that, I thank you. He sighed with relief, pleased at sharing the guilt.
She put her purse on the table and retrieved a cell phone. “I hoped it wouldn’t come to this, but I have to do what’s best.”
“What do you mean?”
She opened the camera app and scrolled through pictures until she found a grainy black-and-white image and showed it to him. “I’m pregnant.”
Pregnant?
Shock punched him in the gut. He rubbed his eyes, hoping he’d misheard her or the whole thing never happened and this was some weird dream. But no, when he looked up, she was still there, her eyes filled with anticipation. She edged a couple of inches closer to him.
He dropped his gaze to the phone she held, with the outline of a baby greeting him. “May I?” he asked, and she handed it to him.
He touched the screen to enlarge the picture, and found her name on the bottom of the sonogram picture. She wasn’t lying. The last time they’d had sex had been about two months prior, days before she left the house. A last attempt at reviving their nonexistent sex life.
A lump of frustration lodged in his throat, and he tried to swallow it, but his tongue stuck to the roof of his mouth.
This was all wrong.
“I know it’s a lot to process…and I’m sorry I didn’t tell you before. I’ve been thinking about it, and when I saw you with Monique tonight I realized it’s becoming serious between you two if you’re bringing her to this type of event. You had to know or I wouldn’t forgive myself,” she said softly.
He pinched the bridge of his nose. Guilt lanced his chest and he reached for his collar, wondering if he’d done it too tightly. Because he wasn’t elated to hear about becoming a father, like he would have been if she had told him months ago. Or if the mother happened to be Monique. A heavy weight sat on his chest. “When did you find out?”
“Some time ago. I’m at eight weeks, give or take a few days,” she said. “I didn’t know, at first, if I’d keep it. That’s why I didn’t say anything. I needed time to think. Then, I really warmed up to the idea and now I can’t picture myself not having this baby.”
His temples throbbed and he rubbed his forehead, wishing to will away the frustration. “Ashley—”
She stood, caressing her stomach. She wore a beaded, ruffled gown so it was hard to see the size of her belly, particularly because Ashley had always been so slim. “The doctor said the first pregnancy takes a while to show. You can come with me to the next appointment.”
Zaine stared at her in silence, drawing a long breath, afraid he’d say the wrong thing. If she thought he didn’t know what she was doing, she was wrong. He sighed. Could he really divorce her now when a baby was involved? But he didn’t love her.
He loved…Monique.
The realization pounded his already throbbing temples with a vengeance. To think that a few minutes earlier he’d abstained from joining the group talking about a politician’s affair because he didn’t want to waste time with any drama. Well, now his life had become a soap opera. Within a short time he’d learned he was going to be a father and he couldn’t live without the woman who happened to be the one not carrying his baby. Shit.
Ashley squeezed his shoulder. “It’s a lot to take in. I’ll let you go, because I don’t want to be here when Monique returns. Think about it. You can’t throw away four years together, and the chance to raise a baby, because of a fling.”
He gritted his teeth. “She’s not just a fling.” She’s the best thing that ever happened to me.
She tilted her head to the side, looking at him in a condescending way like he had no idea what he was talking about. “I understand. I’ll give you time to think about what you want to do. I’ll call you again in a couple of days.” She gave his shoulder a tighter squeeze. “Now, if you’ll excuse me.”
He clasped the tumbler and took it to his mouth without delay. He drank a generous amount, the liquid burning down his throat. When he glanced to the other side, he found Monique walking his way. She strode closer, her spine locked in place. She’d probably seen him talking to Ashley and noticed the expression on his face. Probably knew he’d gotten bad news.
He stood before she reached him. “We have to talk,” he said.
