Page 85 of Finding Carly
“Nothing,” Carly said.
“Bullshit. Spill,” Kenna ordered.
Carly couldn’t keep the smile off her face. “Jag and I just have…special plans tonight.”
She didn’t need to explain. Kenna squealed a little and clapped her hands lightly. “Yay! Are you nervous?”
“No.” And she wasn’t. After everything that had happened between them, sex with the man she loved more than life itself wasn’t anything to be nervous about. She hoped and prayed everything would go smoothly for Jag’s sake, but she wasn’t overly worried about that. She’d experienced Jag’s increased confidence firsthand in just the last week.
Shehadbeen worried about his first session with the psychologist, about all the horrible memories he’d have to relive, wondering if they’d make him reticent to touch her sexually. Instead, the opposite seemed to happen.
Jag had touched her more in the last several days than he had in the last couple of months. He seemed more…secure in his masculinity. He kissed her longer and harder, his hands lightly roamed her body when they lay down to sleep. He smiled easier, laughed more. It was as if the weight of the world was beginning to lift from his shoulders.
No, Carly wasn’t nervous in the least, she was excited about what making love might do for their relationship.
Kenna tilted her head as she studied Carly. Finally, she said, “I’m happy for you. Jag’s really great. Kind of quiet…but I have a feeling you’re helping him slay his demons.”
“Who said he has demons?” Carly asked a little defensively.
Kenna shrugged. “It’s fairly obvious…but not in a bad way. He’s relaxed a lot since meeting you. It’s a good thing, Carly. I’m not judging or anything.”
Carly forced herself to chill. “I know, sorry. And heisgreat. I literally don’t think I would’ve been able to make it through what happened without him.”
“Order’s up!” one of the cooks in the kitchen yelled, making both Kenna and Carly jump in surprise.
Kenna chuckled. “Jeez, he loves to do that,” she complained.
“Yup.” At one time, being startled like that would’ve sent Carly into a panic attack. She was proud that she could laugh it off now.
Glancing at her wrist, she saw that she only had twenty-five more minutes before she was done. Jag had texted earlier. The guys were working later than usual, and Aleck had arranged for the car service to pick up both her and Kenna.
Carly knew the time would come when she needed to start driving herself to work, but for the moment, she was content to keep things as they were. She was getting better, less frightened to be out by herself, but she also didn’t want to rush things. Baker was still working on uncovering who was helping Shawn, and the last thing Carly wanted to do was be one of those “TSTL” heroines in some of the romance books she liked to read.
Thinking about romance made her thoughts return to Jag. She couldn’t stop the smile from forming on her lips.
“Oh, Lord, don’t go daydreaming again,” Kenna complained. “Get your order out, woman.”
Carly smiled. “You’re just jealous,” she taunted.
“Nope. Really happy for you, actually. But knowing you’re gonna get some tonight makes me want to show my man how much I lovehim.”
Carly rolled her eyes as she put two chicken sandwich meals on her tray. She turned, balancing the tray on her shoulder, and looked at her friend. “Probably a good thing for all of us to make sure our men know how much we love them. I have a feeling they’re gearing up to be deployed again.”
Instead of disagreeing, as Carly had hoped she might, Kenna nodded. “Yeah, I’m getting that impression too.”
For a second, Carly felt the familiar panic begin to rise within her, but she pushed it down. She didn’t want to think about being on her own without Jag to lean on, to make her feel safe, but she vowed to never put more stress on him than he might already feel leading up to a mission. She’d be fine. She had close friends, and if she felt she was in danger, she’d just hole up in Jag’s apartment until he either returned or she felt brave enough to venture out again.
“Everything’ll be okay,” Kenna soothed, putting a hand on Carly’s free arm.
She nodded. “It will,” she agreed. Then smiled at her friend before turning to head into the dining room to deliver the meals. She wasn’t going to think about Jag leaving. It was inevitable, but she didn’t have to make herself sick wondering when or how long he’d be gone. This was a part of her life now, and she needed to prove to herself, and Jag, that she was strong enough to handle it.
For now, she wanted to concentrate on moving their relationship forward. And tonight was going to be the first step toward the rest of their lives.
* * *
The anticipation was thick in the air, but Carly did her best to ignore it. She’d put some chicken breasts in the oven when she’d gotten home from work, taken a shower, shaved her legs, and made sure to put on more of the cherry blossom lotion than usual, because she knew Jag loved it so much.
When he’d finally gotten home, they ate dinner, talked about how their days went, and generally tried to ignore the desire building between them.
