Page 27 of Finding Carly
Which made Carly’s smile widen. Then she felt the need to say, “I should warn you, I’m usually not as amicable as I’ve been lately. I’ve let you talk me into a lot of things, but don’t get used to it.”
It was Jag’s turn to smile. “Yeah?”
“Yeah,” she said.
“Okay.”
“Okay? A lot ofguysdon’t like independent women who think for themselves.”
Jag didn’t answer right away. He pulled into the parking lot down the street from Food For All and turned off the engine, before turning to face her. “Some men do love having submissive women. But it’s exhausting having to work all day, then go home and make all the decisions about a relationship or a household. Especially in my line of work. SEALs need their women to be strong enough to not fall apart when they’re sent on a mission. Throw kids in the mix and it’s even more important.”
Carly couldn’t help but be relieved at his words. He went on.
“And you can’t use that asshole Shawn as a metric,” Jag went on. “Guys like him want all the control, they thrive on it. They don’t want a partner. Don’t want someone to share their lives with. They need to completely dominate someone to make themselves feel like they’re hot shit.”
“He wanted me to move in with him, but I kept putting him off,” Carly admitted. “He wasn’t happy. But I couldn’t do it. Luke was still living at home, and it felt weird to me. I knew his son hated me, and the more Shawn tried to convince me moving in was what good girlfriends did, the more I balked.”
Jag’s brow furrowed. “Is this about you staying at my place?” he asked, the worry evident in his tone. “Because I amnothinglike that fucker. If you want to go back to your apartment, you can.”
“No!” Carly blurted. “That’s not what I meant at all…unless,” her voice got softer, “you want me to go?”
“Hell no, I don’t want you to leave,” Jag said. He took a deep breath and closed his eyes. “I’m screwing this up,” he muttered.
Carly couldn’t stop herself from reaching out. This man was such an enigma. “You aren’t. I shouldn’t have used that as an example,” she said, resting her hand on his forearm.
Jag’s eyes popped open and he looked at her. “I’m not good at relationships,” he admitted. “I’m good with being a friend. I’m a great teammate, both on and off the battlefield. But man-woman stuff is completely foreign to me. I…I haven’t had very good role models.”
Carly stared at him, sensing he was trying to tell her something, but not sure what it was.
“I’m trying to learn from Mustang and the others by watching the way they interact with their wives and girlfriends, but it’s a lot different than I expected. I said this earlier, and I’ll say it again—I’ll always have your best interests at heart. I might not explain myself very well, and I’ll probably say stupid shit. But you’re important to me, angel.”
“You’ve had girlfriends before, right?” Carly asked.
Jag blushed. He actuallyblushed. Carly wasn’t sure she’d ever seen a man truly blush when he was embarrassed before. It was one more thing that endeared him to her.
“No.”
It was Carly’s turn to be confused. “Never?”
“I’ve been with a couple women, but never had a true girlfriend.”
“Jag…I just…that’s just so hard to believe. You’re…Look at you! You’re so damn good-looking. You’ve got all those muscles, and you have this badass expression on your face most of the time. Yes, it scares people, I’ve seen it, but womenlovethat shit. The bad boy thing and all that. And what about high school? Or when you were in your twenties? Don’t most SEALs take advantage of the fact that women fall all over them because of what they do?” Carly knew she was babbling, but it was impossible to believe that this man hadn’t had a girlfriend—ever.
“Most SEALs, yes. But not me.”
Emotions swirled in his chocolate gaze, and Carly wanted to know everything he was thinking and feeling. But they were in a car, in a parking lot, and this didn’t feel like the right place to have a deep conversation.
“So…you’re a virgin,” she teased.
He didn’t even crack a smile.
“Holy crap. You’re not a virgin, right?” she asked, completely shocked.
“No, I’m not a virgin,” Jag said after a long pause.
“Not that it would matter if you were,” she added. “I just…seriously, Jag, you’re like my every fantasy come true. You’re hot, smart, protective, compassionate, scary when I need you to be, and I don’t care if you’ve been with five hundred women or none. I’m just thrilled, and nervous as hell, that you want to dateme.”
Jag reached out, palming the back of her head and bringing her forehead to his. He held her against him, and Carly gripped his forearm. She had no idea what he was thinking.
