Page 24 of Miss Behaved
He’ll just hurt you again.
I repeat it over and over in my head. So many times that it starts getting fuzzy, the way words do when you say them enough times. And when he glances my way, I fail to remember their meaning.
For a man who claims to be miserable at this retreat, he sure seems to be doing fine.
A buzz in my purse catches my attention, and I look at it, only to have my stomach drop.
Steven: I’m sorry. I miss you. Please call me.
Talk about words I don’t need to see or hear right now.
“Apology text. Classy,” Carson says from behind me, and I almost drop my phone in surprise.
Wasn’t he across the room five seconds ago?
I’ve tried to avoid him all night. I didn’t sit at our assigned table at dinner once I saw his nameplate across from mine. I’ve purposely drifted away each time he came near a group of people I was talking with. I even ditched my spot in line at the bar just so he wouldn’t end up directly behind me. But his presence is a beacon that pulses.
Calling me.
Calling me.
“You would know.” I roll my eyes at him and tuck my phone back into my purse.
Carson clenches his jaw, and those melty blue eyes lock on mine. It might be rude, but why should I care? Carson walks around here acting like we can just restore the factory settings on our friendship and no harm, no foul.
As much as the sight of his full-grown, chiseled body makes me wish that were possible, my heart still remembers what it’s like to be hurt by him. The ache in my chest waves like a warning flag.
“Monica!” Grace darts out of a group of people and nearly knocks Carson out of the way to get to me. She pauses for just a moment to throw her platinum-blonde hair over one shoulder and narrow her eyes at him. He must feel the heat radiating from them, because he turns and integrates back into the crowd.
“That man looks at you like he wants to eat you up,” Grace says as we watch Carson walk away.
“Eat me up, spit me out, and run me over,” I correct her.
“You knew each other as kids, right?”
I nod, but I don’t elaborate. She doesn’t need to know he’s the one who shook up my insides and messed me up for all men, that his playful smile is a walking reminder of why I need to stay strong and keep him at a safe distance.
Grace slips into the chair next to me and crosses one of her bare legs over the other. I might be blessed with a long, lean torso, but never the legs-for-days that men seem to go for. Especially Carson.
As much as I’ve tried to avoid him the past ten years, it’s impossible to not catch the occasional tabloid story. Especially given hisglowingreputation. I’ve seen the women he goes for now. Models, the occasional actress. Tall, waif-thin, faces like they’ve spent years sucking on lemons.
“I’ve got good news, and better news,” Grace says with a wink.
Exactly what I need right now. “Have at it, then.”
“Mary loves the rough outline you’ve put together for your next series. Like, really loves it.” A giant grin stretches her face.
“That’s great!” I say. After my last series underperformed, I really need to hit this one out of the park. If my publisher is already feeling it, that’s a great sign. “And the better news?”
Grace tilts her head toward me, and her grin slowly spreads. “They want five books.”
My eyes go wide. Five is huge. Astronomical. Most of my series are three books, with one that made it to four. If they want five, they must really love my idea. Excitement swims through me, but it’s cloaked with the smallest shadow of doubt. Five books is more than I’ve committed to in the past. And since I’m already feeling a little lackluster in my writing, I need to use this conference for all it’s meant to be and find my spark again if I want to pull this off.
“There’s one more thing,” Grace says, straightening up in her chair. “A teeny, tiny, little thing.” She holds out her thumb and index finger with a half inch of space between them. “I assured them it shouldn’t be an issue.”
Her nose scrunches, and I know that look. She’s about to ask me something I’m not going to want to agree to.
“They’d like you to consider open-door sex.” Her hands hold on to her legs like she’s bracing for an explosion.
